


The Redneck and The Samurai (III)

by twhite179



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Andrea - Freeform, Baby Judith, Carl Grimes - Freeform, Carol - Freeform, Daryl Dixon x Reader, Daryl Dixon/Original Female Character(s) - Freeform, Daryl Dixon/You - Freeform, Lori Grimes - Freeform, Maggie - Freeform, Merle Dixon - Freeform, Michonne - Freeform, Original Female Character - Freeform, Reader Insert, Redemption, Romance, The Governor - Freeform, The Prison, Woodbury, daryl dixon - Freeform, daryl dixon / original female character, glenn - Freeform, hershel - Freeform, reader - Freeform, rick grimes - Freeform, the walking dead - Freeform, the walking dead - family, the walking dead - relationship - Freeform, the walking dead season 3, twd, twd - season 3, walking dead - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-30
Updated: 2020-12-29
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:00:41
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 27
Words: 77,295
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27787138
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/twhite179/pseuds/twhite179
Summary: After the trauma of your past and the world now in utter chaos, you'd never have thought you'd have found a group such as this to ride out the walker filled world. You navigate through this new apocalyptic life with Rick Grimes and others, including a certain redneck with a crossbow, facing obstacle after obstacle together and fighting for one another as friendships turn into family.Part 3 - Months since the fall of the farm, you and Andrea suddenly find yourself at a place called Woodbury, run by a man who calls himself the Governor. You are met with a face from the past but nothing stops you in wanting to carry on your search for the group, still holding onto the hope of finding them. Will coming across a prison change this? Will you be reunited with the group? With Daryl? What follows may just change your lives.(Part 4 posted)(Follows the walking dead (TV) storyline but with my added reader character, plotlines and twists of existing plotlines.)
Comments: 1
Kudos: 6





	1. one

Seven months. It had just gone over seven months now. All that time and we’d found no one. It had just been us two, Andrea and I, surviving together. We’d been trying to find the group, any signs of anything to track or interpret and follow but anything we found, came up a dead end. Andrea had lost hope long ago, insisting it was a lost cause and we would never find them, but I had faith. I had hope. It had wavered from time to time, when we had bad days or weeks, but I always pulled it back. There was more to life than just surviving from one day to the next and being with the group made me feel like we did have one, together. That’s why I never gave up. We’d been going from place to place, searched so many areas and there were a few more I wanted to search but then winter came. Andrea had got sick towards the end of it and our search got put on hiatus. Her condition and shelter becoming the priority.

After winter had passed, however, Andrea’s state hadn’t got better. Now back in the heat, it seemed to have got worse. I had been doing runs on my own, coming back to her wherever we were hauled up in with whatever I could find. Which wasn’t much these days. We had been slowly making our way in the direction to the areas I wanted to scout and search, stopping a lot for Andrea and to avoid walkers and herds. It had been a long seven months. But he we were. Alive, just maybe not well. 

I was making my way back to Andrea after a run, to this deer cooler place we’d been staying in the past few days. I didn’t have much to show for, except some aspirin I’d found. I came back to find Andrea curled up on the floor, not looking especially good today. I aided her to a sit, giving her some of the aspirin I’d found having to help her sip water from the bottle to wash it down. I held the bottle to her forehead and face as she gained the energy to speak.

“How is it out there?” she weakly asked, referring to the amount of walkers that were staggering around outside. “Same. It’s quiet.” I reply.

“You’re lying.” She breathes. 

I was. There seemed to be more and more each day now. No doubt a herd coming in this direction soon. I sigh. “We should go in a few days.” I suggest.

“They’re coming.” Andrea points out. “You should go.”

“No.” I protest. “I’ll hold you back. Go. I can take care of myself. I saved your ass all winter, didn’t I.” she jokes. Smirking at me cause we both know it was the other way around. She suddenly breaks into a fit of coughs and as she comes out of it, I try helping her drink from the water bottle, but she pushes it out my hand away from her.

“I won’t have you dying for me. Good soldier, won’t leave your post. Screw you.” She says, wrapping herself in the blanket, curling up.

I sigh. “We’ll go in a few days.” I state, rising up to a stand.

“If we stay I’ll die here.” She sadly points out. I stare at her on the floor, contemplating our next move. “Alright.” I reply. “We go now.”

We made our way out the back, avoiding all the walkers out front on the street, heading into the woods for cover until we could get back out on the road.

Later on, we’re walking on the road. Grassy fields either side of us, surrounded by the woods. It’s quiet. Andrea walks a couple steps behind me as I try not to walk ahead, turning slightly back now and then, checking that I haven’t walked too far ahead of her. As we’re walking along the road, I start to hear the whir of distant helicopter blades. I look around and see one coming in our direction but black smoke is pouring from it. Andrea gets to my side as it flies over, both of us watching as it passes, coming lower and lower until it crashes into trees of the surrounding woods. Staring at the black smoke rising from the woods, Andrea then faces me as if to say we’re going and walks off into the grassy field, headed for the crash as I follow.

We arrive at the crash site, the helicopter in ruin, as it sits in a small clearing. We stand in the treeline, Andrea breathing heavy as she suddenly vomits and has another coughing fit. I tell her not to push herself and help her behind a shrub to sit, handing her the gun from the bag before I move into the clearing to check out the crash.

Upon approach, I find a female soldier on the ground next to the helicopter blade that has been chopped in half by it. I instinctively put my hand on my katana’s handle, ready to unsheathe it if necessary as I proceed around the helicopter. I look around it and I’m about to check inside but start to hear vehicles in the distance. I look through the inside to see some trucks headed this way. I step back to move away and rush back to Andrea in the surrounding treeline.

“Someone’s coming.” I whisper as I crouch down next to her.

“Any survivors?” she asks. “Two dead, not sure about the other.” I quickly reply as I watch the trucks pull up.

A group of men get out the trucks and start looking around as one orders them to fan out, most likely the leader. We stay crouched and hidden behind the shrubbery as the men take out some walkers that have stumbled into the clearing while one man looks around and in the helicopter. They find someone in the helicopter still alive, the man calling out, referring to him as ‘a breather’, as one of the other men helps him get the survivor out the helicopter. 

“He’s saving them. We should show ourselves.” Andrea suggests.

“Not yet.” I whisper. Still not sure on the group of men.

The apparent leader of the group moves towards one of the other soldiers, that sounded as if they were alive, moaning in pain. But he doesn’t help them, he instead unsheathes his knife and stabs them. He starts going around all the others and stabbing them too. Why would he stab a survivor? He just helped one but then just killed another without a glance. I didn’t like the strangeness of it, we were staying hidden no question. 

Andrea tried keeping her sporadic coughs quiet, cupping her hand over her mouth to stop the noise travelling. We carry on watching the men as they walk around scoping the clearing, one of them getting a little too close for comfort, causing me to unsheathe my sword slowly and quietly, just in case, but he doesn’t spot us. The leader orders to move out and a quiet sigh of relief escapes me, Andrea too. We watch them walk back to their trucks before a twig snaps behind us and in an instant I bring my sword up to a stance, holding it faced down ready to rise and swing as I do at whatever was now behind us but I’m stopped by a man’s voice.

“Ah, ah, ah. Easy does it, girl. Mine’s a whole lot bigger than yours. Now, put down your weapons.” The man behind orders. I knew that voice. I start lowering my sword to the ground next to me as Andrea does the same with her gun. 

“That’s it. Nice and easy. And let me see your hands.” He continues. It was definitely him. We both rise our hands by our heads. 

“Now spin around. That’s it. Nice little twirl around.” He instructs as we slowly turn around to face this man. 

Shit. It was him. It was Merle.

“Oh, holy shit. Look at you both.” He exclaims, kneeling on one knee holding a gun at us, glancing at me to Andrea. 

“Damn blondie, you ain’t lookin’ so hot” he pokes at Andrea, before turning back to me but I notice a walker is making it’s way towards us from behind Merle.

“Now you on the other hand, darlin’ samurai. You’re lookin’ good.” Merle continues, looking to me as the walker snarls right behind him.

He turns bringing his left arm around and stabbing the walker up through it’s jaw into the head with a huge blade, that replaces his hand, attached to the metal contraption around his arm. So, he survived. And put his stump to use, I thought. 

He grunts pulling his blade out the walker, the gun still on us, and rises up to a stand, holding his arms out as he speaks.

“Now, how’s about a big hug for your ol’ pal, Merle.” he teases, raising his eyebrows as he gives a small nod. Andrea faints as he looks on at us smirking. A smirk I have not missed.


	2. two

Andrea was being treated. We’d been taken by Merle and this group, bags over our heads as we travelled to their camp or whatever and wherever it was we were. They had put us in a room, only then removing the bags, when soon an apparent doctor had come in to treat Andrea. I sat right next to her the whole time. I didn’t like that we were here. The start of all this coming off as strange, the group at the crash site, the bags over our heads, being kept in this room, and of course, Merle was here. That was enough to make me suspicious and unsure. 

“Why are we being held here?” I question the doctor. I get nothing. “We wanna leave.” Andrea adds as the woman finishes up with her.

“You’re not well enough. And it’s dark. You should stay the night.” She answers, directed to Andrea.

“Where are we?” I ask.

The woman glances to the two men standing by the door, then back to us before answering. “That’s not for me to say. He’ll talk to you.”

“Who?” I probe but the door opens and Merle walks in, dismissing the doctor.

“Go check on your patient, Doc.” He orders. Obviously referring to the guy they saved from the crash. She leaves as he goes to grab a chair to pull up.

“Bet you was wondering if I was real. Probably hopin’ I wasn’t. Well, here I am.” He chuckles at the end, pulling the chair into the middle of the room, standing over it.

“I guess this whole world gets a lil’ smaller toward the end, huh? Ain’t so many of us left to share the air, right?” he adds, sitting down in the chair.

“You know, when they found me, I was near bled out. Starvin’. Thinkin’ to myself, a bullet might make a good last meal. Take myself a nice, long nap after. Wait for Daryl on the other side.” He begins explaining.

“Am I supposed to feel sorry for you? Maybe you shouldn’t have left.” I chime calmly but sternly, with a cold look that could kill.

He chuckles. “Forgot you had a bit fire in ya girly. But maybe it was you who shoulda left with me, huh?” he counters. There’s a pause as we stare, my cold look backing down as we do. 

“You seen my brother?” he asks us. A little shiver of sadness goes through me at the thought of Daryl. Andrea sees this, knowing how I feel about him now, and answers. “Not for a long time.”

He scoffs. “Makes the three of us.”

“He went back for you. Us. Him and Rick. But we both know- you’d already up and left by then.” I state.

“Ah well,” he laughs as he starts to take off his arm contraption that hosted his blade, which wasn’t currently attached to it. “Not all of me. Ain’t that right, Samurai.” He laughs lightly again, showing off his stump. Andrea looks away momentarily in disgust while I continue looking at Merle, thinking back to when I chopped his hand off. How I hesitated, not wanting to do it. I should have just chopped it off straight away, I thought, saved myself all the trouble.

“Yeah, Rick.” Merle continues, now strapping the contraption back on. “He’s that prick that cuffed me to the rooftop.”

“Yeah. He tried.” I pause. “Daryl saw that.” I say.

“He’s always been the sweet one, my baby brother.” Merle adds, with the smallest look of sadness as he looks down finishing strapping his arm, but I still notice.

“He wanted to keep looking. Even after what I told him you said back in Atlanta. About you having nothing at the camp. But things happened.” I start explaining but don’t continue, Andrea does instead. “People died. A lot of them. Jim, Dale, Jacqui-,” she lists but pauses, taking my hand. “Amy and Sophia.” She says looking to me, we share a sad look before I look down.

“Your sister? She was a good kid. I’m sorry to hear it.” Andrea nods looking upset but appreciative, nonetheless. He turns to directly face me. “Sophia? Your sister as well, right? She that little girl that was on that rooftop with us in Atlanta?” he asks. I nod, “Yeah.” I say sombrely.

“Except she wasn’t her sister, she was her daughter.” Andrea adds. I glance to my side at her, wishing she hadn’t said that. I wasn’t in the mood to open up that can of worms and painful memories.  
“Now I remember it being mentioned she was your sister, girly, back on that roof.” He states.

“Well, I lied. I had her real young.” I pause and see in his face he’s working it all out in his head no doubt. “And it’s a long and hurtful story I’d rather not dive into right now.” I declare.

“Well, for what’s it worth. I’m sorry, girly. Gotta be hard losin’ a kid.” he comforts and I nod in appreciation. This being the only time I’d seen him showing sincerity and compassion. But not wanting to think about it any longer I change the subject back to the group.

“Yeah, well we, uh, had to leave Atlanta. Wound up on a farm.” I say.

“And Daryl stepped up. Became a valued member of the group.” Andrea starts, then faces me. “You both did.” I give her a weak smile.

“Now he’s dead.” Merle chimes.

“We don’t know that for sure. We got run off by a herd. As far as I saw, he made it out. Daryl and I saved Carol when I got off the bike for her. They drove off, while I got away too.” I explain.

“How long ago?” he asks. “About 7 months ago.” I answer.

“We both got separated from the rest of them. Y/N saved me; found me in the woods. We got left behind but Y/N doesn’t see it that way. She still thinks she’ll find them. A total optimist.” Andrea elaborates, giving me a look at the end I’d been seeing all of those months when we talked about the group.

Merle laughs. “Well, if you ask me that sounds like some serious denial there girly, not optimism. So, how’s it feel knowin’ you got left behind just like your ol’ buddy Merle here, how we both got left behind for that matter.” I don’t answer, I just stare, but that never stopped Merle, it still doesn’t. “What? Can’t stand the idea of the people you thought you knew just up and leaving you behind without a second glance? A second time for you now I suppose. What? Think they’re not capable, cause I can assure you they’re capable.” He prods, trying to get a reaction, back to his usual self.

“Maybe, maybe not. But I’m not you Merle, I’m sure they had their reasons, but I haven’t given up, I want to get back to Daryl-,” I pause, taking a small breath, “To the group. You didn’t say the same.” I retort.

He looks at me curiously, pausing a moment before speaking. “Now wait a second, do I spot a twinkle in the eye for Darylina over there? Well now I see why he didn’t come looking for me, not when he had a piece of ass as fine as yours at his tail, huh samurai?” he teases. I stare not answering, growing tired of him and annoyed.

“What do you want from us?” Andrea questions.

Merle’s expression drops back to a cold, serious look as he rises off his chair and around it, stepping towards us.

“Damn. There she sits, four walls around her, roof over her head, medicine in her veins. And she wants to know what I want from her. I plucked ya both out of the dirt, blondie. Saved your asses. How about a thank you.” He replies.

“You had a gun on us.” I point out.

He laughs. “Well, who ain’t had a gun on ‘em in the past year, huh? Show of hands, y’all. Anybody? Hm?” He says, putting his stump up, walking back around the chair. “Shupert? Crowley? Y’all had a gun on y’all?” he questions, looking to the two men, standing by the door still as he turns back to face us. He scoffs. “Hell, I think I’d piss my pants if some stranger come walking up with his mitts in his pockets. That’s be the son of a bitch you’d really wanna be scared of-,” Merle babbles on until Andrea cuts him off.

“Thank you.” She says. I look at her in disbelief at the fact she’d just said that. Merle clearly surprised too as it shut him up. 

Just then, the man I saw at the crash, the main man who was calling out the orders, enters the room from the opposite side Merle came in as the room had two entrances. Merle steps over towards him at the doorway and they mutter between themselves as we come to a stand to face him. I can’t make out what they’re saying but he soon acknowledges us.

“How you feeling?” he asks.

“We want our weapons.” I sternly answer. They’d taken them away from us en route to this place. I didn’t like being without my katana.

“Sure. On your way out the front gates.” He replies.

“Show us the way.” Andrea says. He looks to her. “You’ve kept us locked up in this room.” She adds.

“You see any bars on the windows? You’re being cared for.” He retorts.

“Under guard.” I point out.

“To protect our people. We don’t know you.” He states.

“We know enough about you to want out of this place. We watched you drive a knife into the skulls of two dead men. What the hell was that all about?” Andrea bursts.

He looked at us like it was a stupid question. “They turned.”

“They weren’t bitten.” I state.

The man looks to Merle, they share a knowing look before he sighs, facing back to us. 

“It doesn’t matter. However we die, we all turn.” He explains. 

I hear a small, quiet gasp of air escape Andrea but I suddenly think back to Randall. His neck was broke, he had no bites and he was a walker when we found him. It made sense. He was telling the truth. “I put them out of their misery.” He adds.

“It’s not easy news to swallow at first, but there it is. Now, you’re not prisoners here, you’re guests. But if you want to leave, as I said, you’re free to do so. But we don’t open the gates past dusk. Draws too much attention.” He says, walking towards the door on the other side of the room, standing before it as he continues. “And you, especially. You need a solid night’s sleep. You wouldn’t last another day out there in your condition.” He points out to Andrea. 

“I’ll have you brought over to my place in the morning, return your weapons.” He declares as he turns to leave the room, stopping in the doorway. “Extra ammo, food for the road, some meds. Keys to a vehicle if you want one.” he continues, Andrea looking to me like it’s a sweet deal but I’m not so sure. There’s something about this man and place that’s off to me. I don’t know what. I feel like they’re gonna want something in return. “Send you on your way. No hard feelings.” He adds, interrupting my thoughts, as he walks out, Merle urging us forward to follow him.

We walk through a large house, coming towards its front entrance. The man opens the doors; we step out onto a porch.

“Welcome to Woodbury.” He announces.


	3. three

As we look out from the porch, we see there’s other buildings and houses around. It was a small town. How had it survived this long is all I thought?

“Come with me.” The man said as he walked past us, down the steps. With Merle and the two other men behind us, we followed him off the land of the house, towards the town’s edge which was lined with a wall. So that’s how it’s survived. It’s a small, fortified town. He takes us over to the wall, where Merle and the men join a couple others up onto the wall. Merle saying orders to a few of them.

“Are you military?” Andrea asks. The man chuckles. “Hardly. A couple of vets, but by and large we’re self-trained.” He states.

“That’s heavy artillery they’re packing.” I point out, noticing their armoury of weapons, just on the wall, looking around the place.

“Some men arrive with guns, but most of the weapons are scavenged over time.” He replies.

“And the other side of town? The rest of the streets? They’re all guarded like this?” Andrea questions, though he just looks to the wall, not responding, a slight hint of pride on his face. “Can’t be.” Andrea answers herself. “They can. And it is.” He then responds.

Merle whistles down to us. “Got us a creeper, Governor.” He announces. The man nodding back to him. Merle grabs a gun, aiming at the walker or walkers outside.

“Governor. They call you that?” Andrea asks.

“Some nicknames stick, whether you want them to or not.” He replies.

“Blondie, Samurai, they’re nicknames. Governor’s a title. There’s a difference.” I state.

Merle begins shooting a few walkers that have approached the wall, shooting off three rounds. He calls out ‘clear’ back down to the Governor.

“We’ll get them in the morning. Can’t leave them to rot. Creates an odour, makes people uneasy.” He explains.

“What people? There’s nobody here. It’s a ghost town.” Andrea points out.

“This way.” He says, nodding back towards the town as he walks off back into it.

We’d followed him into one of the buildings on the street, an apartment building, where he led us to a room we’d be staying in.

“You’ll be more comfortable here. Not the four seasons, but there’s a hot shower. Water’s limited, so keep it short.” He declares as he shows us inside the room. It’s small but a reasonable room. A double bed, a shower, a dresser, a couch, a table and chairs. There’s even bowls of fruit and nuts on the table and clothes on the bed. But I still feel uneasy, not being able to out my finger on it yet. “We got food, water, fresh clothes. Hope this works.” He adds as we step inside, I brush past him.

“I know you’d feel better with your sword. More secure. But you’re safe here.” He continues, talking at me. I turn my head to face him, just to glare, which he holds. It’s definitely him that’s making me feel uneasy. I don’t like him. 

“We appreciate it.” Andrea says to break it. 

“What about the pilot? Will he make it?” she asks.

“Well, Dr. Stevens is doing all she can. Now, I know you’ve got a lot more questions, but I got work to do.” He replied, walking to stand in the doorway. “My man will be outside the door if you need anything else. I’ll see you tomorrow.” He continues before he leaves. I push the door shut hard. I can’t wait to leave, I think.

The next morning, we’re walking around the town and the people were all out now, scattered everywhere walking around, doing jobs. We were with some woman with a clipboard, showing us around; I couldn’t believe this was where we were right now, at the sight of her. It all felt so out of place now, after everything. She talked to us about the town, the people in it, how they hadn’t suffered a casualty or breach in so long. She was just singing the Governor’s and his men’s praises. If anything, I was finding her a little much. I’d never thought I’d be in a place that seemed somewhat safe from the world, walled and guarded, a bed to sleep in, roof over our head and I was itching to leave. 

We were brought over to the Governor’s place that morning, like he said, being served breakfast at his table; him and Andrea mostly talking. There was another man named Milton sat with us too, he looked like a scientist or something. The three of them talked about us out there all those months surviving and Andrea asked things about Woodbury, all of them talking about how it works, all while we ate. I’d noticed during their conversations, Andrea’s gun and my katana in a glass panelled trophy cabinet. I made a mental note of it before I began pick eating at my eggs, listening to the conversation that now was the Governor declaring this place meant the start and rebirth of civilisation, that we’d take back the world. Though, I found that hard to believe.

One of the Governor’s men knocks and enters the room as he opens it. He looks at us, then mutters to the Governor so we can’t hear; then leaves. Something has happened or something is going happen I suspect, meaning he was about to leave or ask us to and I didn’t want to leave without our weapons.

“Sorry to cut breakfast short, but this can’t wait.” He announces.

I stand from the table. “We want our weapons.” I exclaim.

“Well, we can make these meals to go, and your weapons will be waiting outside, but you should take time to relax. Get your strength back.” I look at him as he talks, calculating his words. “You know, have a look around. Who knows, you might like what you see.” He finishes, before leaving. I couldn’t help but notice that he’d said we could leave on essentially two occasions now, but something had stopped us from doing so. The gates don’t open on certain times, now we’re told to stay and relax, build our strength, that we already have. Andrea was better now; it was just a lame excuse. What was his game? 

Andrea and I were walking out the building, after leaving the Governor’s when I aired my thoughts. “I don’t trust him.” I state.

“Why not?” Andrea asks as I notice the man that had come into the Governor’s room just before, staring at us. “Have you ever trusted anybody?” she adds.

“Yeah.” I retort.

“Then give this a day or two. That’s all I’m asking. Some time to get our shit together.” She says.

“Our shit never stopped being together.” I counter.

“Didn’t look that way yesterday when you and Merle were talking, if you’d have had your sword, I bet he would have found it in his eye.” She mocks.

“He’s just an ass. But it didn’t help that you poked at me about wanting to find the group.” I jab. 

“Oh, come on Y/N, when are you going to realise they’re gone. We’re never going to find them. Your chasing a pipedream.” She says.

“You might have given up. I haven’t.” I coldly reply, walking off.

Nearing the end of the light of the day, the Governor and his men had returned back to Woodbury with a bunch of army vehicles along with their own which seemed a little odd to me. They’d saved that soldier from the crash, perhaps he’d spoke about his base. But, if these were from his base, where were the soldiers that would have come with the vehicles? The Governor had stood up onto one of the trucks, delivering a speech to the people of the town about how the soldier they’d saved had told them about his convoy, the other men in the unit, they were part of the National Guard and they’d gone to help them. But, when they’d got there, they were all dead; walkers getting to them first. How coincidental I thought. They’d brought their trucks and supplies back with them because it was things they needed, then he rinsed the story with honouring their sacrifice, to not take things they had for granted. Anything that came out this guy’s mouth just sounded like bullshit to me. I had a bad feeling about him and I wondered how Andrea couldn’t see it. 

The following day, I decided to check out the army vehicles, wanting to see if I could spot anything that proved or fuelled my suspicions. I made my way along the wall near the gated entrance, towards the space where all the vehicles had been parked. Upon inspection, I see there’s bullet holes in some of the vehicles and one truck I saw had blood splattered in the back, when I looked closely, it appeared reasonably fresh considering they brought the trucks in yesterday. Something definitely went down. I jumped down out of the back of the truck and as I rounded it, I was met by the Governor.

“Pretty amazing. We find more ammo, we could cut down a whole pack of biters.” He pauses. “I hear you and Andrea are leaving today. That’s a shame. We could use a soldier like you.” He states.

“Seem like you’re holding your own. Even the National Guard was overrun.” I say.

“No amount of training can prepare you for the world today.” He replies.

I start slowing stepping forward. “You’d think one soldier would drive away, especially against something so slow.” I point out.

“Those men were heroes. Not the kind to leave anyone behind. If only we’d gotten there sooner. And you were with us.” he replies as he walks around me, stopping behind. There’s a moment of pause.

“Lots of bullet holes. You think walkers figured out how to use weapons?” I question.

He chuckles. “They must have encountered bandits weeks ago. It’s ugly out there with them. You know that better than anyone.” He replies.

“It’s too bad, what happened to Welles.” I say. Learning of the surviving soldier’s ‘passing’ not too long ago.

“It is.” He agrees. “Dr. Stevens couldn’t revive him. Merle put a bullet in his brain.” He says.

“No funeral?” I ask. “We cremated him. Quietly.” He answers. It all seems a bit curious. Everything can’t be a coincidence.

“These people have been through so much, I figured, thank god at least no one knew him.” He adds.

I step forward closer to him. “Thank god.” I reply sarcastically, though I don’t make it too obvious, just a little, before walking off. This man was so full of shit and I felt as if I was the only one who could smell it on him.


	4. four

and scout the areas we hadn’t got to yet better, easier. We were in the room, looking them over as I was figuring out a plan of action for when we left, Andrea listening.

“If we leave soon, we’ll get a few hours on the road before dusk.” I announce.

“Where are we heading?” she asks. I point and explain the areas in which need searching, the best ways there, how long, etc. She nods along until I finish, wating to propose her question.

“Y/N, just hear me out. What happens if we don’t find them.” She asks.

“We will.” I say.

“But what if we don’t. You can’t spend the rest of your days searching for them. Out there on the run, every day.” She points out.

“I’d rather take my chances out there than stay here.” I state.

“Because your gut tells you there’s something off about this place? About the Governor?” she probes.

I look back up at her. “It’s kept us alive this long.” I clarify. 

“That’s true.” She agrees.

Having been looking over the maps, a part of me suddenly had a spike of conscience while the other part of me said it was a waste of time as I thought of talking to Merle about looking for the group. I’d figured he had to be at least curious about whatever happened to Daryl. He was his brother. Against my better judgment, I took a map and walked out the room in search for Merle.

“Hey, Merle. Got a sec?” I call out, causing him to turn in my direction. He’d just got down from the wall as I approached it.

“Hey girly, what you got to talk with me about? Thought you didn’t like me.” he replies.

“Look, I might not like you that much Merle, but I care about finding the group. And I could tell the other day when we talked about Daryl that you, maybe, missed him. So, I thought I’d share some things on the map with you. Wanna hear it?” I elaborate.

He smirks slightly and gestures for me to continue. I show him on the map where the farm was, the highway and all the areas we’d searched, plus the ones I plan to check out once we leave. When I face him, he looks slightly impressed, but it soon changes back into his classic smirk as he looks me up and down. “What?” I probe.

“If you’d been with us at Atlanta earlier girly, I think we would’ve hooked up.” He teases, acting as if he was coming on to me, though I don’t think he’s serious, just playing his usual games.

I roll my eyes. “Oh yeah, you think so?” I say, smirking at the mere joke of it.

“Mmhmm, I know so. And judgin’ by the looks of you n me, we would’ve had a damn fine time too.” he replies.

I laugh. “Yeah, I don’t think so.”

“Oh, come on now, girly. Why not?” he questions.

“Well, Merle, in the small amount of time I knew you, for starters, you called me a rug muncher and a whore.” I started.

“I gotta way with words, don’t I?” he interjects.

“Yeah. Then there’s the small fact after I helped you, you turned on me and left me for dead.” I finish.

He smiles. “Uh huh. Missin’ your point, girly.” He replies.

I pat him on the shoulder. “Yeah, I’ll let you ponder on that one.” I say.

“What, I thought you got a thing for Dixon’s, or is that just a Daryl exclusive? You guys get cosy?” he teases.

“Come on, Merle, give it a rest. I’m trying to help you here.” I dismiss.

“Mmhmm. Why you doin’ this?” he questions.

“I’d want the same thing if it was my family out there.” I answer.

“My family’s right here. I got everything I need.” He says. 

“I don’t believe you. Daryl’s your brother, Merle. You don’t have to act all macho in front of me, I’m not the Governor. You’d rather stay here, than look for your own blood?” I ask, shocked at his previous comment. But, then I realise it’s Merle I’m talking to and he’s said this kind of thing before. 

“Ain’t playin’ no act and I ain’t lying neither, girly.” He retorts.

I sigh. “You sure you don’t wanna come with us, you’re not at all curious about the group? Daryl?” I ask.

“Why are you? Weren’t you cut loose?” he questions.

“I’m sure they stuck around for a while, we just missed them is all. Got there too late.” I theorise.

“Ain’t that a big ol’ pig sack. We got something in common, girly. We got left behind by the same people. And saved by another.” He says, before starting to walk off but I turn around, speaking after him.

“Have you ever thought about leaving this place?” I question, making him stop and turn around. “Never had a reason to.” 

“Not even for Daryl?” I point out.

“Let me just put it this way. I wasn’t in the best shape when the governor found me. He should have just kept on going. He did more for me then the group ever did.” He explains.

“I stayed for you, Merle.” I remind him calmly.

“And look where you are now, girly.” He says. There’s a pause shared between us.

“Well. I intend to go looking. If you change your mind, and promise to keep hands and blades to yourself, you’re welcome to join.” I offer. He nods, with a small smile, before waking off. Merle was an ass but a part of me thought that deep down, he must have had a nice side, he must have wanted to look for his brother. I think he was just covering it all up.

Later that day, I was in our room, clearing everything up. I was packed and ready to go, but it didn’t take long, we didn’t exactly have that much stuff to haul around. I was ready to leave and I had assumed she came in to get ready for exactly that but turned out I was wrong. She wanted to stay and try the place out a little longer. The Governor had clearly got in her head.

“I thought we had an agreement?” I remind her.

“We can always leave tomorrow, or the following day.” She replies.

“The following day?” I repeat. It was always, we could leave the following day. Never when we wanted. Never at all.

“We don’t want to walk into trouble that we can’t get out of.” She justifies.

“Tell me about it.” I probe. “Y/N, it is just a day or two.” She jabs.

“I heard you- the first time.” I sternly say, pushing past her leaving the room. I was growing tired of this delayed departure and now Andrea wanted to stay. This place was digging its claws into her, the Governor was, she just couldn’t see it.


	5. five

Woodbury had put on a party. Of all things. I found it all a bit too much. This place was getting to me. I wanted to leave, I wanted to continue the search. Instead, we were stood here standing around with cold drinks and snacks. Then that’s when it came to me. If the Governor and everyone were out here, no one would be in his place. Where our weapons were being held. It was the prefect moment to get my sword back, so I slid away. 

The place was empty. I quietly closed the door behind me before marching my way over to the cabinet, taking out my katana and strapping to my back. It felt good to finally have it there again. I figure it could be good to look around the room while I was here, see if I could find anything on the Governor that would prove my gut feelings about him. I see a journal on a desk and open it to flick through. There are a few pages of notes about plans for the town but as I slick through I come across a list of just names. The last being ‘Penny’ and it was bolder than the rest and underlined. What was it about? Below the list, there was line after line drawn across the page, on every line. I flicked through it again, to find the lines carried on across several pages. What was this? Clearly, something was wrong with him. I was pulled from my thoughts when I started to hear a thumping sound coming from another room behind a door to my right. I go to open it, but it’s locked. Grabbing my knife, I started trying to jimmy it open when I then heard voices approaching the place. I bolt across the room to hide, just making it when the Governor walks in, Milton and Merle too I hear. They were talking about some kind of experiment Milton wanted to do, that they should postpone tonight’s plans in favour of it starting now. The Governor refused and as I listened, I heard the clinking of bottles. They’d come back for more booze. 

As they began to leave the room, I left the one I was in out the window. It led me to the back parts of Woodbury. The covered parts it seemed. I walked around, seeing if there was anything worth seeing when I came across a locked cage, with walkers inside. The hell? This place just got weirder and weirder. I annoyingly smirked, knowing something dodgy had been going on and this was something that testified to it. I broke the latch that held the lock, breaking open the doors to the cage, letting several walkers inside free. I walked back, unsheathing my sword as they approached me out the cage. I stood and waited for them. The first got close and I rapidly took it’s arms off, then sliced it’s head in half, I whacked the one next to it behind me and killed another in front, sending the sword into it’s skull. I pushed it back off my sword with my foot, to then swing round and bring it down into the skull of the one behind me. I turn back around, cutting another in half across its torso. I ran at one, stabbing its neck, pushing it to the ground and stomping its head in as I spun on the spot, slicing the head off the last walker. I stood back looking at the slaughter of walkers, I couldn’t help but smirk. Although killing walkers wasn’t exactly my favourite past time, I liked using my sword. I was good with it. And I liked the thought that those walkers were there for a reason and I just killed them all, probably going to annoy the Governor. A win in my books. Wiping my sword on the body of a walker, a door suddenly flies open, revealing one of the Governor’s men and he was holding a bucket of what looked like human remains. He dropped it at the sight of the walkers I’d taken down in front of me. 

I was put in a room, waiting for the Governor, sat at a table, facing away from the door. Merle standing guard until he arrived, leaving and closing the door behind him.

“You get off on that?” the Governor asks. He starts walking towards me and around the table into my eyeline. “Poking around other people’s things?” he had my katana, setting it down against the wall, before turning to face me.

“We got nothing to hide here.” He adds.

“People with nothing to hide don’t usually feel the need to say so.” I point out.

“That’s fair. We all have our secrets, huh?” he replies.

“Like Penny?” I question.

“You know about Penny? Then you know I loved her.” He answers.

“Bet you say that about all the girls.” I mock. He pulls the chair out, taking a seat at the table opposite me.

“You got the wrong idea about me.i’m just a guy trying to do right by the people I care about. Now, you want to leave. Andres wants to stay. So you want me to take choice out of the equation. You want me to kick you out.” He chuckles. I just stare.

“Actually, I was about to give your sword back-“ he starts, looking back at it, before facing back to me, his voice turning deep and serious. “Because you fit in. We’ve enjoyed having you.” He states. I say nothing.

He gets up, grabbing my sword and walks around me. “This is a real problem for me. People follow the rules, and whether or not it’s true, they believe it’s what keeps them alive. You’ve turned that upside down. You’ve broken the rules. If I don’t do anything, I invite anarchy.” He begins.

“How about this?” he says, stepping closer, next to me on my right side, holding my katana as I stay looking ahead. “I keep a lid on your little outburst, you join the research team. You obviously have skills. You’re not afraid of biters. Merle will take care of you, and then-,” he proposes but is cut off by my sudden movement. I rise, spinning to face him straight on, I grab my katana, spinning it around in his hands so he loses his grip on it and I take it back, unsheathing it at the same time, bringing it out and round, up to his chin. I’d heard enough crap coming from him. I held the tip against his throat. Neither of us say a word, we just stare. I back away to the door, turning to face it, I put my sword back in its holster before ripping open the door to leave, marching off. Research team? What did they need a research team for and what exactly was it they were doing? I decided I didn’t actually care. Not anymore. Not now. I was ready to leave and I wanted to go now. 

I was back in our room when Andrea came to find me. “We gotta talk.” She announces coming into the room. “We gotta go.” I quickly reply, starting to collect our things.

“The Governor told me what happened. Y/N, you cant do things like this. You’re freaking people out. You’re freaking me out.” She informs.

“The northeast wall is guarded by some girl. We can escape there after dark.” I say, shoving her bag to her.

“We are not prisoners here.” She assures.

“No one who comes here leaves.” I point out.

“What are you talking about? It’s safe. There’s food, there’s shelter, there’s people for god’s sake.” she argues.

“That’s what they show you, but you can’t leave unless they make you.” I exclaim.

“You are not making any sense. Y/N, maybe you need to sit for a minute.” she suggests.

“You need to trust me.” I state.

“And you need to give me more to go on. We’ve got a good thing going here.” She counters.

“I thought this was temporary.” I say.

“And I think we need this. I want to give this place a real shot.” She announces.

“I tried.” I snap. 

“Breaking into houses? That is not trying. That is sabotaging.” She claps back.

I sigh, splaying my hands out in front of me, now calmly replying. “This place is not what they say it is.” 

The sooner she realised this the better. And we could go. Leaving this, from what I could tell, seemingly twisted place behind us.


	6. six

Having managed to convince Andrea to come, eventually, we made our way out to the gates to finally leave. We walked through the party that was still going on, nearing the gates when Merle calls after us.

“Hey, hey, hey. Hey, girls. Where are y’all off to in such a hurry? Huh?” he calls out, Andrea stopping to look at him, but I touch her arm, moving her forward as Merle makes his way over anyway.

“Hey, come on, now. Come on. Hey, hey, hey. Y’all breaking my heart running away like that. “ he starts as he comes up past us, stopping in front blocking our path.

“We’re leaving.” I state sternly, my current mood not caring if he wanted to come or not, though it looks like he didn’t. But I do.

“It’s almost curfew. I’d have to arrange an escort. I mean, the party’s still going on.” He replies. I just stare with annoyance. Yet again, another excuse, another reason we shouldn’t or can’t leave. “Alright. Wait here a sec.” he orders as he walks over to one of the main henchmen that was on wall duty, talking to him about something. No doubt about us. Andrea walks towards him while I stay put.

“The governor said we were free to come and go whenever we like.” She says to him but he turns and just tells her to step back, she walks back over to me.

“See. There’s always a reason why we can’t leave yet.” I point out. Andrea looks down as in defeat, finally seeing what I’ve been saying but then one of men yells ‘clear’ from on the wall.

“Now if I was y’all, I’d find some shelter before nightfall.” Merle states before opening the gate. I look on in slight disbelief and shock. I’m glad it’s open but now I can’t help but think, after all the times we wanted and asked to leave and now it was as simple and easy as that. Something felt a little off.

“Something’s up. They didn’t want us to leave and now it’s that easy. They must’ve been waiting to let us go at the right time, one that they wanted. They’re up to something.” I theorise quietly to Andrea.

“Do you hear yourself? How can you know that, and why would they bother?” she questions, just as Merle shouts for us. “Ladies!” he calls. 

Andrea turns to Merle at the gates. “Close the gates.” She orders. ”No.” I demand quickly, touching her arm to face back to me.

“I practically begged the Governor to let you stay.” She says, slight annoyance appearing in her voice.

“I didn’t ask for that.” I state. 

“You didn’t have to. That’s what friends do for each other.” She retorts.

“It goes both ways.” I retaliate.

“So you wanna run around out there with walkers on your tail every minute. I mean, is that right?” she questions.

“We held our own.” I reply.

“Nearly eight months. Eight months on the road moving from place to place. Scavenging. Living in a meat locker. Looking for people who are gone. That was no life. I’m tired. I’m tired. I don’t have another eight months in me. Not like that. And you-“ she exclaims, pausing.

“What about me?” I ask.

“I’m afraid you’re gonna disappear. I’m worried about you cause you’re just chasing a dream. One you’re not gonna find, not anymore.” She answers. I look at her deflated, knowing what in evidently is going to happen no doubt, as she continues, sighing. “We always talked about this place, didn’t we? A refuge. That idea is what kept us going.” 

“No. That’s what kept you going. My ‘dream’ is what kept me going.” I state. We share a moment of silence, just staring at each other, each of us pleading the other with our eyes. I finally break the pause.

“Are you coming or not?” I calmly ask but looking cold.

Andrea’s face drops. A saddened realisation evident on her face that I was going to leave if she came or not. “Don’t do this. Don’t give me an ultimatum. Not after everything.” She pleads.

“Are you coming or not?” I repeat. She sighs, with the same expression, looking down, not responding as she looks back up. 

A little hurt but annoyed at the decision, I walk around her to leave. “You’d just slow me down anyway.” I state as I walk past her.

“Y/N!” I hear her call as I pass Merle at the gates, but I don’t stop or look back. I just keep walking out the gates until I hear them close shut. Woodbury, the Governor, Merle. All finally behind me. Except, now Andrea was too. I hoped I hadn’t made a mistake leaving her. But I knew I hadn’t made one leaving Woodbury. That I was certain.

It hadn’t taken me long to get back on track with my search, back on the road. I was determined more now than ever to find the group. I didn’t care how long it had been, I was going to prove Andrea wrong. They were out there somewhere, and I would find something that led me to them. I would. 

After several hours, I’d made it to the first area, a small housing estate that was backed by woods. It was one of the two I had left to search and the one Andrea and I had been headed to before we stopped to search the helicopter crash. If I found nothing at these two, I’d have to move on even wider than I already had with Andrea and I’d do that if I had to; they’d have to have stopped somewhere. Especially with Lori because she had to be about due now. 

I’d emerged from the woods that backed around the street and made my way to the first house of the street. I scavenged it, looking around for any signs of anything and supplies if I could get my hands on some. The first few houses came up empty and when I entered the next, I started to feel fatigued from the whole day. I’d started it looking at the people of Woodbury having a party and ended it being here alone. I looked around and figured it was secure enough to stay in for the night and I stayed there until the morning, to resume checking the houses.

The houses were coming up almost empty every time, the odd can here and there but more or less nothing. In the last house, I left it with the exact same result. I sat on it’s porch steps, just stopping for a minute before I had to start my trek to the next area. There were only a couple walkers around and from leaving the last house, they’d begun to stumble my way, although they were easily rid off with a few swings. As I was now out front of the house, having walked up to meet the approaching walkers, I noticed something ahead when killing the last walker. In its direction, I spotted a house tucked away in a corner, nearer the treeline of the woods. It was one I hadn’t checked yet and I wasn’t going to leave any stone unturned.


	7. seven

Going through the house, it was empty. Just like the rest. Except, it seemed to have been looted fairly recently or at least stayed in. I’d found feathers scattered on what used to be the living room floor, presumably someone plucking a bird ready to eat and an open can of dog food chucked at the fire pit that seemed to have been opened in only the last few days. But I firstly found blood on the floor in various places around the house, all probably walker blood from being taken out but the stains also couldn’t have been more than a few days old. Both of which, is what told me it hadn’t been long since whoever was here, got here and left. Someone or a group had swept the house and took them out. It could have been anyone, I knew that. It could have been one person; I could have taken out all the walkers that were in here. But what sold me and put a hopeful gleam on my face for the first time in what felt like a very long time, was two other things I had found. 

When coming into the living room, after spotting the feather and dog food, I found an empty bottle of pills. Crouching down and picking them up, I saw that they were prenatal vitamins. It was something. What if it was Lori? She could have found some and been taking them, which meant the group could have been here. It was a stretch I know, but what solidified my theory was upon walking out the living into the hall I noticed a broken arrow chucked into a corner. Upon closer inspection, I realised it looked exactly like the ones Daryl and I would whittle and make for his crossbow. This was it; this was my clue. It had to be them. I was sure of it.

I checked around the outside of the house to look for tracks coming out any exits. At a back door, I found a group of prints leading on a dirt path towards the back of the property where a wood hut and a couple sheds were. It looked as if it was the driveway, where the cars were kept, as the bend ahead in the driveway turned back on towards this end of the street. There were seemingly fresh tire tracks, same as the blood and can, on the dirt road leading off back onto the street and that’s when I saw my next confirmation. There was a single, smaller tire track with the rest, one that looked a lot like a motorcycles. An arrow and a bike. Prenatal vitamins. It was them. I knew it was. And I was going to find them. 

I followed the road, in hopes of following their tracks but the road had soon turned into tarmac, leaving nothing to track, so I stuck to the sides of the road in case I saw any tracks leading into the woods that surrounded the road. I walked along the road for what seemed like hours, although I have no idea how long it actually was but at some point I’d found a couple sets of tracks that steered off into the woods and had come back again, coming from the edge of the road. They led to a creek. So, they must have filled up on water and carried on going. So that’s what I did.

It wasn’t long up the road when I found several sets of tracks, again coming from the road, leading into the woods. It looked as if a lot of people had gone this way and not many tracks had come back. This seemed like a promising lead. I followed them through the woods and came to an old set of train tracks that they continued along. Moving along them, I ended up at a clearing and below the embankment was what looked like a prison. Or at least it was. 

Quite a lot of walkers surrounded the prison’s fence line. They were scattered but stumbling around the area and pushing on the first fence, a couple in small clusters, which was backed by a second several meters behind it, creating a walkway. The yard and courtyard, from what I could see, had scattered dead bodies laying around. They could have been killed at the start of all this and left to rot but it seemed unlikely. People must have cleared it but the prison from first glance seemed empty and uninhabited, although they could have just been inside. That’s when I noticed in the distance at the road entrance of the prison, there looked as though there were cars parked in between the fences there. I couldn’t make out what exactly they looked like or if there was a bike as a guard tower slightly obstructed some of the view. But that meant people had purposely put vehicles in between the fences to stop them from being taken, keeping them within reach and blocking the entrance. What if this was the group? What if they were hauled up inside this prison? What if I had actually found them, after all this time. I smiled in hope and silently to myself, thanked my adoptive father who had taught me to track and Daryl for continuing to do so at the farm. And if the group was in there, it had got me here.

I was about to move to head down when I noticed something in the fence walkway. A small cluster of walkers were gathered around the fence and they had just slightly moved around revealing a person was there, in the walkway. That was what they were trying to get at. I couldn’t tell what the person looked like from this far but what I could tell was that they were definitely not dead. They were crouched over a dead body, probably a walker, though I had no idea why. I pushed the thought to one side as I made my way down and into the woods, trying to keep unseen in case the person spotted me before I wanted them to and in case I drew walkers.

A creek blocked the way across to the fence line. Although, it looked rather shallow, meaning it was an easy walk across but it would make noise, drawing attention from the walkers. I stood in the treeline, waiting for the walkers to move around again so I could get a better look at the person behind the fence. After a few moments, I managed to make out it was a woman who was crouched over this dead walker, looking as if she was cutting it open for some unknown reason. But then I suddenly clocked the woman had short, grey hair. She looked like Carol. She sat up straight for a second, wiping her forehead before hunching back over the body, giving me an even better look at her. 

Holy shit. It was Carol. And if she was here, so were the rest of them. I’d found them. I’d finally found them!

Without even a second of hesitation or care, I made my way to the creek and rushed into it. The water was shallow, as I thought, though it did come up to my knees. The sounds of the sloshing water, caused by my strides coming through it, pulled the attention of some of the walkers at the fence where Carol was. They begun to stumble their way towards me and I noticed Carol looking up at the noise also. 

“Carol!” I shouted nearing the edge of the creek. I figured the walkers were already coming at me, so announcing myself aloud wasn’t going to matter much anymore. I could just make out through the cluster of walkers as I came out the creek that Carol was trying to see through them too at who I was. I unsheathed my katana and stepped forward to take down the several walkers in front of me. Nothing was going to stop me from getting to that fence now.

I sliced and swung my way through them. Coming to a stop at the last swing of the sword as the last walker falls to the ground, revealing to Carol who I was. I saw the confused expression on her face drop, turning into one of shock as she saw it was me, stepping closer to the fence at the realisation, gripping hold of it.

“Y/N?!” she called.

I was smiling at her and about to reply when I heard moans and snarls getting louder at my sides. I looked to see the surrounding walkers, hearing the commotion and shouts, were heading towards me and closer than I would have liked. There was a considerable amount stumbling over; I could take most of them down as they came but if too many surrounded me at once then that was a mess I wouldn’t be able to get out of. I needed to get in that fence. Before I could even think as to how, Carol snapped me from my thoughts.

“Over here! Hurry!” she shouted, rushing over to a specific part of the fence.

I ran over to where she stopped and I’d become really close to one side of the oncoming walkers. If I didn’t get in now, I’d have to fight them off. There was a part of the fence that was cut and they’d tied it together with some kind of cable. No doubt how they probably got into the prison in the first place.

“Hang on!” she exclaimed as I came to a stop in front of her. She had begun to untie the cable, in order to start untangling it from either sides of the cut wire fence that was pulled together, so we could pull it apart and I could slip my way in. I was stood there fidgeting on the spot as the walkers got too close for comfort. I was going to have to start taking them down. Even if Carol got the fence untied just in time for me to slip in without fighting them off, we’d have to tie it back together and it would be difficult with them all pushing and clawing their way against it. I’d need to take a lot down regardless in order to do so. 

“Keep going Carol.” I ordered before stepping back and facing the closest walkers. Several on the left side were nearing me within arms reach so with my first swing I took the first walkers arms off, bringing it back slicing its head in half. I rinsed and repeat with the oncoming walkers, taking one down at a time until it quickly had to become a couple at a time as they came at me from both sides now. 

“Y/N! Come on, it’s open!” she yelled.

“Not yet! There’s too many! We’ll never get it closed!” I shouted back, still taking down the walkers beginning to surround me. I couldn’t stop. Not for one second. My sword was swinging in every direction as I spun killing them. I noticed that Carol had stepped through the fence, knife in hand, and started killing some walkers around it, to stop them trying to get through, that had staggered her way but the majority had stayed focused on me away from the fence. I don’t know how many I had killed at this point but the limbs, bodies and heads started piling up around me and I had to move soon before I got stuck in this position.

“It’s clear, Y/N! Move!” she called heading back through the fence opening.

I turned, facing away from the fence as I began stepping backwards through an opening, still furiously cutting down the walkers that were now in front of me and coming at my sides. I wasn’t going to let them take me or breach the fence. Not now. Not after finding them. 

“Behind you! Look out!” Carol screams. From hearing Carol’s scream, I make an almighty swing from my left side to my right, taking the heads off three walkers in front of me before spinning to find another coming at me from behind. I was about to bring my sword down into its skull when suddenly, it was killed through the head by an arrow. I turn to the direction the arrow flew from and there he was. There they were. Daryl was standing in the fence walkway ahead in the distance, wielding his crossbow. Rick and Glenn were running in front towards Carol. They must have seen Carol helping someone or heard the shouting or something to have come out to help but I didn’t care how or why. They were here. 

I wasn’t admiring the sight long at all when I felt a hand grab my shoulder. I didn’t even have the second to spin around, so instead I just swung my sword around my front to my left side, bending my head back slightly as I brought it over and around the back of me, for it to come back to my right side. I didn’t turn to look at the damage the swing of the sword had done, I just ran for the fence. Carol and Glenn were now both holding either side of the fence open so I could slip right through. I heard Rick shooting off rounds at the walkers behind me, presumably Daryl firing arrows also at any that got too close. I slowed slightly at the fence but never stopping, I slipped through the opening Carol and Glenn were holding and fell to my knees in exhaustion on the walkway after a couple steps inside. Not having a second to breath it felt like since I started taking the walkers down, I knelt there with my hands splayed on the ground, panting. 

I turned to see Glenn tying the fence back up closed as Rick carried on shooting the walkers. Carol was stabbing some through the fence with what looked like a metal rod. I rose to my feet instantly to join her at the fence, stabbing walkers through the skull, that were pushing against the fence, with the end of my katana as Glenn finished tying the cable through the fence. He then started doing the same with a machete. Rick dropping his gun and also joining with his bladed weapon. 

After all of us were stabbing the rest though the fence, they were all dead within a minute or so. I was exhausted and just took a couple steps back, still breathing heavy, looking on at all the dead walkers that were now on the other side of the fence. I braced myself for looking at the others. Eight months. This was the moment I had been waiting for and wanting for now nearly eight months and I felt the emotion start to swell in my eyes when I heard Rick say my name.

“Y/N.” Rick said, grabbing my attention.

I turned to see three faces looking at me with what seemed to be a mix of emotions. Shock. Confusion. Surprise. Disbelief. I was just hoping somewhere in there they were happy to see me because I knew I was to see them. 

I gave a small smile to them all and Carol immediately returned it as she strode over, arms out in front of her, bringing me into an embrace. 

“I can’t believe that you’re here. But I’m so glad that you are.” She says to my ear, her head on my shoulder still in the embrace. “Me too.” I whisper in hers before pulling out her hold, trying to hold back my tears.

“Holy shit, Y/N. You’re-- what did-- how did yo-- shit.” Glenn stuttered, not getting his words out as fast as his head was thinking. I chuckled in reaction as we both stepped forward to hug each other. As I left the hug I turned to Rick. There was a small sadness in his eyes I spotted but he managed a small smile, nonetheless. I returned it as I stepped towards him. I grabbed him into an embrace which he held. We don’t share a word, but we didn’t have to; we still didn’t need to. He would always be my friend, no matter what. As I pulled out the hug, I looked at him and gave him a small nod in acknowledgement that even after everything, we were okay.

That’s when I turned and saw him. Daryl. He wasn’t stood with the other three. He was stood a few metres away, his crossbow dangling from his hand at his side. I could see his expression was full of sorrow, maybe even guilt, when he dropped his head to the ground slightly. My heart broke at the sight. I started walking towards him and his head lifted back to face me. He looked as if he was holding back his own tears and that was enough to send mine sliding down my cheeks. My pace quickened as I approached him and he started taking slow steps forward. He dropped his crossbow as I neared, now jogging towards him, before I enveloped myself in his arms. His arms wrapped themselves around me, pulling me in tight. My tears were silently trickling down my face as I breathed and sniffled into his shoulder, hearing a sniffle from him also. At some point, he brought one of his hands up into my hair, holding the back of my head, holding it as it leant against his shoulder. I never wanted to leave this position. I never wanted to let go of him. I finally felt comfortable again.

“M’ sorry.” He whispered suddenly in a saddened and soft, but almost broken tone.

I whispered back, matching his tone. “You don't have to be.” I paused, sniffling. “I found you.” I felt him hold me tighter and I knew I was finally home.


	8. eight

Even though we were in a prison, I felt more at home than I had in months being reunited with the group. Rick had led us into the prison, taking me through to a cell block where I was met by the faces of the rest them as they emerged out a single cell. Yet again, there were faces of disbelief, but they quickly turned to match my smile. Carl was first to run to greet me and it filled my heart with joy to crouch down and hug him tight. He’d grown some since I last saw him and he seemed to have matured a lot along with it, holding his own gun to his side. Lori was quick to grab me when I rose back up to a stand, bringing me into an embrace as much as she could with her baby bump. She was ready to pop by the looks of it. 

I’d hugged pretty much everyone before I was shown into the cell they’d come out of, to see Hershel laying on the bed. But not all of him. One of his calves was gone, his stump, ending just below his knee, was bandaged up and he looked as if he’d just woke up. He looked weak but he was alive. That’s what mattered.

“Oh god, Hershel. What happened?” I question gently, kneeling beside him at the bunk.

“A walker bit him. Rick stopped the infection from spreading.” Glenn answered from behind.

“Y/N?” he spoke softly, taking a small breath. “You’re alive.”

I took his hand, gently squeezing it. “Yeah.” Tears started forming in my eyes again. “So are you.”

“How do I look?” he asked quietly, a small smile arching from the side of his mouth.

“As fine as always.” I smile, pausing as a few tears roll down my cheek in happiness at where I was, but also in a little pity for Hershel’s state. “The beard and moustache by the way, looks good on you. A real stud. Where was this eight months ago, huh?” I jokingly add, trying to lighten the mood as a quiet chuckle escapes me as well as Hershel and I hear a few behind us. He doesn’t reply, still a little weak and breathless, instead just squeezing my hand as much as he could in reply. 

“Eight months.” Rick says, turning my attention back around to him and the others. “How’d you find us?” he asks.

“A hell of a lot of searching and scavenging. And tracking.” I answered.

“Good job we essentially went in circles all winter then. You might not have found us.” T-Dog pointed out. 

“You tracked us for eight months?” Glenn questions quickly after, shocked.

“No. Not entirely. We searched nearly everywhere for months-,” I began.

“We?” Daryl highlights.

“Andrea and I.” I reply. 

“She got out?” Carol questions.

“Yeah. Found her in the woods after the farm.” I answer.

“She dead?” Rick asks. “No. She’s somewhere else. We separated.” I state.

“Why? Where?” Glenn questions.

I sigh, looking across them all. I rose to my feet, gently placing Hershel’s hand back to his side on the bed. “Well, after getting to the highway and you’d obviously left, we set off and we searched all over for months, going through one area to the next. Then winter came; Andrea got sick and she stayed that way well passed winter. Anyway, not long ago we were on our way to one of the last areas I wanted to search when a copter went down over us. We checked it out, but a group of men arrived and we got taken to their town.” I explained.

“Town?” Rick highlights.

“Yep. They’d walled off a small town. Fortified it. A small community live there of around 70 they said. It’s called Woodbury and its run by a man who calls himself the Governor. But I didn’t take to it, whereas Andrea did. She’s still there.” I continued.

“Why?” Lori asks.

“Something was off about the place; more specifically the man who run it. I didn’t trust him from the start and things there and what happened while we were there, didn’t make sense. It was a gut feeling that the place had hidden agendas or personalities, if that makes sense, without going into detail. But Andrea didn’t see any of it. Just what they showed and wanted us to see. We were going to leave; carry on the search for you guys. But she lost hope of it long ago and chose to stay. Said we both should but I couldn’t. I didn’t wanna stay in that place longer than I had to and I didn’t wanna give up on finding you guys. It’s what kept me going. So, I left, leaving her there. Headed for the next area we were gonna search and came across this house. It had a few days old blood stains but more importantly it had an empty bottle of prenatal vitamins and a broken crossbow arrow.” I elaborated. 

I saw the looks of realisation on their faces at the thought of the house I’d found before I continued. “I followed the tracks and the direction they led in until I found more and came across the prison. That’s when I saw the vehicles and then Carol’s beautiful face.” I smile at her, receiving one in return.

“I can’t believe you found us.” Rick states.

“Yeah, well. She’s one tough son of a bitch.” Daryl says from the back of the group. I give him an appreciative smile but looking at his face I suddenly realise I hadn’t told him or mentioned Merle yet. 

“Daryl.” I start, taking a small breath. “Merle’s there. He found us.” I state, seeing the slight surprise and confusion come into his face.

He pauses, clearly processing what I’d just said. “What, my brother’s this Governor?” he replies.

“No. He’s like his second in command or something. One of his henchmen.” I answer.

“Where’s this town? Where is he?” he questions. I move forward to stand in front of him, brushing past others as they step to the side out the way.

“I’ve got some maps. I can show you. But-,” I begin, pausing to accumulate my next words as I sighed. “I asked him if he wanted to come along; look for you. He didn’t want to. He seemed pretty snug there. Said his family was right here.” I saw the deflation in his face, though he covered it well. “If you want to go; if you need to, I’ll take you.” I add.

“Nah. He made his choice. Again.” He answers. I lightly touched his arm in comfort, feeling a little guilty that this was the second time I’d told him Merle chose not to come back to him. Choosing himself over his family. Daryl stepped back though, walking away from the cell. I hated being the one to tell him that again, it made me think back to Atlanta. Merle really was an ass. Daryl deserved better.

“Alright. It’s been a long day. Hershel needs rest and so do we. We’ll start cleaning up tomorrow. Everyone get some sleep.” Rick announces following a moment of silence after what I’d told Daryl. People start moving out the cell while Maggie, Beth and Glenn stay with Hershel. I dawdle outside the cell, watching the others walk away, not knowing where to put myself as Rick comes out, patting my shoulder.

“Good to have you back with us, Y/N. I’m sure you’ve been through hell to find us and I’m glad you did. I’m happy to see your face again.” Rick said.

“Thanks, I am too. But I’m sure you went through the same.” I reply. He nods, turning his head forward.

“Hey, um. I can’t help but notice Shane isn’t here. What happened there back at the farm? I always wondered. The whole Randall situation was totally staged, and Daryl and I heard a shot.” I question after a pause.

Rick faces back to me, a small sigh coming from him. “You’re right, it was all a roose. He took me out to kill me. Ended up the other way. The shot you heard was Carl shooting him. He’d turned and was coming at me from behind, he took him down.” he answered. “You know we’re all infected right? When we die, we turn.” He adds.

I nod. “Mmhmm.” I hum. “Some world, huh.” I say.

He lets out a sigh. “Come on. I’ll show you to a cell.” He urges, tapping my arm for me to follow.

We go up some stairs to the above floor, coming onto a perch that Daryl was occupying a corner of away from the stairs. Rick showed me to an empty cell I could sleep in, walking off to fetch me a blanket, even after I insisted I had one in my backpack. He brought one back saying it was best to have a spare, for your head as there weren’t many bunk pillows around. I took it and he left, not saying much to me at all but I figured the day had been taxing for them all with Hershel and whatever else had been going on without me arriving on top of it all.

Sometime later, I was lying in my bunk, staring up at the bottom of the one above me, trying to fall asleep when I heard someone clear their throat lightly for my attention. I looked over to see Lori standing in the doorway to the cell, showing a small smile. I ushered her inside, gesturing for her to sit on the bunk as I brought myself up to a sit.

“Sorry to intrude.” She apologies, lowering herself onto the bunk.

“There’s no need. I can’t sleep yet anyway.” I reply.

“Yeah. The first night was a little difficult for me too.” she agrees.

“Well, I can imagine they’re all a little difficult for you now from what I can remember from growing someone inside you.” I joke with a comforting smile. She chuckles in agreement, looking to the floor with a slight nod, leaving a small pause. I could see she was working her way up to say something.

Lori looked back up to face me, breaking the silence. “I wanted to see if you were okay.” She states. “Eight months out there is- well- it must have been hard. Then finally coming upon us. I guessed it just might have been a lot, retracing all your steps to us.” She continued.

“It was hard at times. But finding you guys again- it was all worth it.” I assure her, holding her hand. “You’re my family now.” I add. She squeezes my hand in reply, wearing a touched smile. 

“You know, I think Rick doesn’t know what to say to you. It’s why I came to see you. I can see he feels guilty.” She announces quietly. 

“Yeah I know. I see it too. But he doesn’t need to be. No one does.” I reply.

“Y/N. If we’d have known you wer-,” she begins. “Hey. Stop. You don’t have to explain or justify. You did what you had to do to survive. We all did. And now we’re back together. That’s all that matters now.” I interrupt as we share a emotional smile.

“And the groups about to get bigger too. You’ve gotta be about ready to pop, right?” I point out happily.

Lori holds her smile but I can see the expression behind it change. “Yeah.” She plainly says.

“How are you feeling?” I ask softly.

“Honestly? Scared.” She begins. “I would do anything for this baby. Like any mother. But- I-I just feel like this is death sentence.” She states and I can see she’s welling up a little, but I don’t interrupt this time. She clearly needs to let something out.

“You know we turn when we die, right?” she sombrely questions. I nod deflatingly in response. “Well, if we’re all infected then so’s the baby. So, what if it’s stillborn? What if it’s dead inside me right now? What if it rips me apart?” she continues, tears in her eyes.

“Stop. Don’t let your fear take control of you.” I state softly, not wanting her to worry.

“Okay.” She sniffles. “Let’s say it lives and I die during childbirth.”

“That’s not going to happen.” I interject.

“Why not? How many women died in childbirth before modern medicine?” she starts, sighing before continuing. “If I come back, what if I attack it? Or Hershel? Or Rick? Or Carl? If I do, if there is any chance and the others can’t do it, you put me down immediately. You don’t hesitate. Me, the baby, if we’re walkers you don’t hesitate. Okay? I’m asking you cause I know I can trust you to do it. To look after my family.” She orders crying and I all I can do is nod slightly because I can’t bring myself to say anything in reply at what she’d asked of me; it was a little shocking to hear something so sad and that she’d probably been caring this worry with her since the farm all this time. 

“It would’ve been better if-,” Lori continues after a moment, stopping to breath. “If what?” I ask. “If I’d never made it off the farm.” She answers, sniffling.

“You know that’s not true. You’re exhausted, frightened.” I assure her.

She nods, taking a pause. “You know my son can’t stand me. And my husband after what I put him through. And I-I tried to talk to him, he-,” she stops, still sniffling.

“Hey, he’ll come around. They both love you, no matter what. What Rick does- it’s all for you and Carl, now the baby too. He’ll come around.” I explain.

“No. He hates me. he’s too good a man to say it, but I know. I put him and Shane at odds. I put the knife into his hand.” she states, tears falling again as she looks to the floor.

“You know who doesn’t give a shit about that?” I question and she faces back up to me. “This baby.” I say. She chuckles weakly with a smile and I’m glad to see it. “Everything is going to be fine, alright? You’ve got all of us to help, we’re all gonna be here. You don’t have to worry about a thing.” I declare, matching her smile in comfort. Lori nods, still sniffling from her cries but manages to keep her small smile as I bring her into an embrace. “Thank you.” She whispers at my shoulder.

When Lori pulls out of our hold, she wipes at her face with a few last sniffles, composing herself. “And here I was coming to see if you were okay.” She lightly jokes. I scoff in amusement, smiling. “Well, you clearly needed that. You ever need to do it again, I’m here okay?” I state. She nods, squeezing my hand before lifting herself up off the bunk. “I’ll let you sleep.” She says as she gets to a straight stand.

“If I can in this cell bunk.” I retort. “You’ll be fine.” She snorts in amusement, walking towards the cell door.

“And so will you.” I reply as Lori steps out the cell, looking back with a smile before stepping off again to leave. Once she was gone, I laid back down, trying to erase the thought of what she had asked of me if anything was to go wrong at the birth. I just hoped it wouldn’t come to that. 

After Lori had left my cell, getting comfortable in the bunk was proving a little difficult so trying to get to sleep was made the same. I had listened to the others settle in their own until it all went quiet and eventually dark, but I still couldn’t fall asleep. I was envious of them all drifting off so quickly, I was exhausted but was having no such luck. The fact I was in a cell wasn’t really helping me, it felt wrong and strange and was the main reason I was having such a hard time drifting off. 

Suddenly I was thinking how Daryl had taken his bunk’s mattress out onto the perch, I figured he had the right idea, probably having the same thoughts as me about the cells. I thought perhaps I could join him out there; that way I may actually get some sleep. So, I grabbed my blankets and mattress and left my cell for the perch. 

I could just make out where Daryl was in the corner of the perch from the moonlight shining in through the window above in the wall. He was tucked away from the stairs at the other end of the perch, in one of the corners against the wall. I crept towards him, making sure I didn’t trip over him or make too much noise, waking him up. I debated putting my mattress next to his, like we had before in the tent back at the farm but then decided against it, not wanting to shock him when he woke up in the morning seeing me laid right next to him. 

As I was beginning to lay out my mattress in the other corner, trying to be as quiet as I could, I heard a murmur come from the opposite corner. 

“What ya doin’?” Daryl said quietly.

“Can’t sleep in there.” I started. “Figured you couldn’t either, so I thought I’d be better out here with you.” I whispered.

“Yeah. I ain’t sleeping in no cage.” He replied. So I was right, I thought.

“Mind if I join you, Daryl?” I asked softly.

“Ya already have ain’t ya.” He pointed out, still keeping his voice low as to not wake anyone.

“I meant next to you, Dixon.” I quietly mocked. “I’d feel and probably sleep a whole lot better knowing your there.” I added.

There was small pause before he replied. “Alright.” He muttered.

I moved over to his corner, laying my things next to his before making myself comfortable. When I settled I was laid on my back, looking up but I soon turned my head to face Daryl who was now in the same position, on his back facing up. For a moment, I admired his face which was dimly lit by the moonlight shining through.

“Daryl.” I whispered. “I’m sorry about Merle. Again. I hated bringing that to you a second time.”

“Don’t be. Ya didn’t have to be sorry the first time, ya still don’t.” he gently replies, but I don’t respond, not wanting to push the matter any further than needed, leaving a moment of silence.

“What happened to ya Y/N? Thought ya was dead, or worse.” He says softly, sounding a little saddened at the memory, breaking the silence.

“Got overrun in the woods. But, Andrea and I made it to the highway eventually, we just- we got there too late. We figured you’d already left.” I explain.

“I wanted to go back for ya. To wait. But Rick said we had to keep moving. We couldn’t stay exposed on the highway like that.” He clarified. 

“Yeah, and it was right to do so. None of you knew if I’d made it out or not.” I assure.

“Mmhmm. Don’t mean I don’t feel guilty about it.” he mutters.

“Don’t be. You all had to think of the group, Rick especially.” I comfort. “Anyway, doesn’t matter now. I’m back.” I pause. “And there’s no getting rid of me now, Dixon.” I tease, nudging his side playfully to lighten the mood a little.

He scoffs but I can hear the amusement from it in reaction to what I’d said. “Yeah, I see that now. We’ve tried twice, ya keep comin’ back like a yo yo.” He jokes. It was me who scoffed that time, turning on my side a little to lightly punch his.

“Alright, redneck. Real nice.” I say, chuckling a little quietly, hearing a small one from him also. It was nice to hear him happy, even if it was just in that tiny moment.

I laid back as another small silence passed. I looked out at the moon, shining through on us, thankful for being back with the people that kept me going through the last eight months. For being back with, what felt like now, my family. 

“Glad ya back Y/N.” Daryl says after a moment, earning a smile from me, though he doesn’t turn to face me to see it. “Nice to have ya back around, part of the group again. Missed it.” he continues.

I soaked in his words, smiling. Only Daryl could have made me feel so happy with those words. I cherished them, and him. I could tell he didn’t want to make a fuss of it though as he still didn’t look at me. I guessed he wasn’t used to showing affection.

“Wait. Is Daryl Dixon saying he missed me. Well I’ll be.” I tease, smirking at him, now on my side with my head propped up by my hand and elbow. 

He turns his head, quickly glancing at me before he speaks. “Ugh, I take it back.” He scorns, slightly playfully before turning onto his side facing away from me. 

I chuckle, watching him turn over but I don’t move back. I stay there looking at the back of him for a moment.

“I missed you too, Daryl.” I start. “More than you know.” I whisper.

He slowly rolls over onto his back, looking at me. He says nothing, just stares into my eyes as I stare back into his. I can feel a slight heat rise in me as it intensifies, neither one of us saying a word or doing anything. That’s when I can’t help myself and I lean over slowly, planting a light kiss on his lips. It was short and sweet; I didn’t want to push it after being apart for so long, not knowing how he’d react. But he didn’t react really at all. I laid my head down, bringing my arm down along my side as I brought my other over the blanket, my hand resting in front of my chest as he turned on his side, facing me. I look down, now not being able to hold his gaze, but after a few seconds pass, he brings his hand against the back of mine, letting them touch before he gradually moves it over. I watch as I open my hand to his, anticipating his touch, and his hand slides into mine, both of us entwining each other’s fingers as we held our hands together.

Looking at our hands, feeling his in mine. This was the most at ease I’d felt since the farm, since we did the same after Sophia was found and he’d cleaned me up from my killing spree in the woods. The memory and the contact brought a single tear from my eye, resting against my nose as I lay in my side still, as I pulled my head up to look at him. He unwrapped his hand from mine, the lose of his touch upsetting me a little but I soon felt it again when he wiped the tear away with his finger, going across and down my cheek, his finger turning to the back of them, as he stroked it until his hand came off the edge of my chin. He then leant in and kissed my forehead. He’d never done that before. I had always given him a light kiss on the forehead or cheek before on the farm, so I was surprised when I felt his lips brush my skin. I’d closed my eyes at the touch, as if to savour the feeling more. When I opened my eyes he was, once again, looking into mine and I saw a vulnerability in his that the moment had brought on. I felt happy and privileged to be the person that he allowed to see this; it just made me like him all the more. And that’s why I then bit the bullet and kissed him again. But it wasn’t short like I’d just done, and it wasn’t rushed like it had been at the farm. It was perfect. I brought my hand up to cup his face as he returned the kiss, both of us melting into it as his arm wraps over my waist, pulling me closer against his body. His lips are soft and sweet, damp against mine as his tongue traces the seam of my mouth and I part my lips under him. The sensation of it all sending shock waves and shivers through me in pleasure. I move my hand slowly down to caress his neck, his hand now caressing my skin on the small of my back where my top has slightly risen from my waist, as we share warm kisses.

I’m not sure how long we stayed like that, although I didn’t care; I was sure I could’ve stayed like it forever. When we finally broke apart, our foreheads rested against each other, small breaths escaping both of us. I nestled against him while he adjusted to my body, keeping his arm draped over me. I breathed in his scent. Smoke, gasoline and leather, a combination along with the slightly rough feel but gentle touch of his hands that allowed me to gradually drift off into a sleep. I thought how I never wanted to stop feeling his lips brushing mine, his body pressed against me and his hands touching my skin. I was truly at home in his arms. This I now knew for sure.


	9. nine

The early morning sun had beamed through the window above us, waking me up to the feeling of Daryl still wrapped around me. I had rolled over in my sleep, facing away from him but his arm still held me close to him. It felt nice to be so close to someone like that, to feel safe in their arms and not wish it to be anyone else but them. Of course it took the end of the world for me to finally like someone. Daryl was the only man I’d ever liked I realised. After Sophia was born, she became my sole purpose in life; I never really focussed on myself much, dismissing the few advances I ever did get at the bar. Not that I regretted any of it in the slightest, Sophia was my life back then and I was happy with that, but this was nice, to feel as if you met your pair. It was a welcome new feeling.

When Daryl finally woke, others began coming out their cells, readying for the day ahead. Rick had mentioned the night before we’d be clearing the prison up and in a strange way I was actually excited to do so but it was more the fact I was doing it with them all than the actual tasks ahead. It hadn’t been a full day back with the group yet and it was like I was never gone. I slotted right back into the dynamic like nothing had happened, helping with clearing up the prison I’d only come into yesterday. But I was grateful for it; it was how I knew we were family. The only family I had now, and the only one I wanted and needed now too.

On the way outside, Rick had filled me in on what had happened since being at the prison. One thing being, an explanation on Hershel’s leg but also about some prisoners that had survived and how, only now, a couple of them were now living in another cell block. The others dead. I hadn’t seen them since being here, but I figured that was probably a good thing. 

We then came into the yard, Rick, Daryl, T-Dog and me, near the entrance with the vehicles, starting a plan of action on where to begin with clearing the prison. Which was by moving all the vehicles inside the prison, rather than just in between the prison fences. 

“Okay, lets get the cars in. Park them in the west entry of the yard.” Rick announces.

“Good. Our vehicles camped out there looked like a giant vacancy sign.” Daryl points out.

“He’s right, they did. It’s how I knew people were here.” I add.

“Yeah, lets do that first. After that, we need to load up these corpses, so we can burn ‘em.” Rick replies.

“It’ll be a long day.” T-Dog says.

“Where’s Glenn and Maggie? We could use some help.” I ask.

“Up in the guard tower.” Daryl answers, pointing towards the one that was next to the courtyard ahead.

“Guard tower? They were just up there last night.” Rick points out, glancing our way as I raise my eyebrows in amusement, sharing a knowing look with him of what they had probably been doing up there. 

“Glenn! Maggie!” Daryl shouts to the guard tower.

We see a head pop up into the view of the windows at the top of the guard tower. Glenn then opens the door as Maggie then pops up also inside. He doesn’t have his shirt on and was currently belting his trousers back up as he called back down to us.

“Hey! What’s up, guys?” he cheerfully calls down.

We all look up smiling and giggling at the sight of him. “You comin’?” Daryl calls playfully.

“What?” Glenn replies, as we all laugh at the obvious joke Daryl just made.

“You comin’?” Daryl jokingly repeats, more emphasis on the word this time, causing more laughter from us all. Especially since Glenn stands there looking puzzled, the joke clearly going over his head or he was just trying to avoid it. Either way, it was funny.

“Come on. We could use a hand.” Daryl shouts up, still smirking as we turn walking towards the cars. Rick and I were still chuckling, and I nudged Daryl’s arm at the amusement he got from it, he was clearly proud of his joke. It was nice seeing him be like this around the others. It was a contrast to what the farm had been like, a good one. 

“Hey, Rick?” T-Dog said, grabbing all our attention back around to the prison where he was looking. Two figures emerged in the courtyard, ones I didn’t recognise. They must be the prisoners Rick mentioned. I saw the smile on his face drop into a cold look when he saw them in the courtyard. He started walking off to meet them as they were headed into the yard, all of us following close behind him. 

“That’s close enough.” Rick stated to the two prisoners as we approached each other. “We had an agreement.” He adds.

One of the prisoners, Axel, started explaining how they couldn’t live in or clear their own block anymore. He mentioned that all the bodies were people they knew. Glenn and Maggie had come out the guard tower at this point, standing behind them listening as Daryl and T chimed in telling them they should be moving the bodies out, burning them but the other prisoner, Oscar, started explaining why they stopped. He’d said the fence was down the far side of the prison, so the walkers were just lining up every time they took a body out. Axel began insisting they had nothing to do with what happened with Tomas and Andrew; I figured he was talking about the other prisoners and what had gone down with them, remembering what Rick had told me. He begged for them to be allowed into our group, not to live back in their cell clock but Rick refused. Oscar dismissed it, beginning to argue and make their case. Pointing out how the bodies they’d been dragging out were their friends, good guys that they had their backs against the bad ones in there. He’d said they’d all made mistakes to get in there and he didn’t pretend to be a saint, but they’d paid their due. He finished saying that they’d rather hit the road than go back into that ‘shithole’ as he put it.

I didn’t know these guys at all and I was naturally sceptical of them, but listening to their plea, listening to what Oscar had to say, did make me think that perhaps they weren’t so much of a threat, just desperate. 

Daryl had locked them in the fenced entrance as Rick had taken us away from them both to convene on what to do with them. He was clearly not in favour of having them around and I couldn’t say I blamed him, but T on the other hand seemed the opposite.

“Are you serious? You want them living in a cell next to you? They’ll just be waiting for a chance to grab our weapons. You want- you want to go back to sleeping with one eye open?” Rick questions T-Dog.

“I never stopped.” He retorts. “Bring them into the fold. Now, we send ‘em off packing, we might as well execute themselves.” He adds.

“I don’t know. Axel seems a little unstable.” Glenn points out.

“After all we’ve been through? We fought so hard for all this. What if they decide to take it?” Maggie begins. “It’s just been us for so long. They’re strangers. It feels weird, all of a sudden having other people around.” She finishes.

“You brought us in.” I say.

“Yeah, but you turned up with a shot boy in your arms. You didn’t give us a choice.” She replies.

“They can’t even kill walkers. Plus, they’re convicts, bottom line.” Glenn states.

“Those two might actually have less blood on their hands than we do.” T points out.

“I get guys like this. Hell, I grew up with ‘em. They’re degenerates, but they ain’t psychos. I could’ve been in there with ‘em just as easy as I’m out here with you guys.” Daryl explains.

“So you’re with me?” T asks.

“Hell no.” Daryl retorts, a sudden change to where I thought he was going with what he was saying. “Let ‘em take their chances out on the road, just like we did.” He continues.

“What I’m saying, Daryl-,” T starts but Rick interrupts him.

“When I was a rookie, I arrested this kid- 19 years old, wanted for stabbing his girlfriend. Kid blubbered like a baby during the interrogation, during the trial. Suckered the jury. He was acquitted due to insufficient evidence, and then two weeks later, shot another girl.” Rick tells us, making a point. “We’ve been through too much. Our deal with them stands.” He declares before walking off with Daryl and Glenn to the vehicles where the two prisoners were now being locked in. I patted his shoulder, seeing he looked a little defeated, before following them.

We moved the cars, and Daryl his bike, up to the courtyard gate so we could drive them. Rick decided and told us we’d give Oscar and Axel food to last them a week out on the road and cut them loose when we were done with clearing the prison before leaving with Daryl and Glenn to collect firewood to start a fire so we could burn all the bodies laying around. They left through the cut part of the fence at the far front of the prison, the part I’d come in through as T, Maggie and I started bringing the cars inside the courtyard. 

We were manoeuvring them around, so they were tucked away next to the fence one in front of the other but all facing out in case we ever had to bail quickly, when the few others came outside into the courtyard from inside the prison, with Hershel. He was making his was down the few steps from the exit on crutches with Lori, Carol, Beth and Carl. The girls were all around him in case he fell but he didn’t need them there by the looks of it. He was doing extremely well considering how he looked yesterday. He was one tough man. I got out the car to stand with Maggie, looking on at them ahead with a huge smile on her face as I put my arm around her, squeezing her in delight at seeing him out, smiling with her. We heard a shout in the distance from Glenn cheering him on from the sounds of it and I noticed they’d just come back into the fenced walkway, standing and looking this way at Hershel from their distance. Maggie and I had just started walking towards them when suddenly Carl shouts.

“Walkers! Look out!” he calls out to us all, looking back into the courtyard.

Maggie and I rush ahead, and I can hear T behind us, as Carl, Lori and Carol start shooting at the approaching group of walkers. Maggie unholsters her gun and I do the same with the spare Daryl had given me, coming up next to Lori joining to take down the walkers. Beth and Maggie help Hershel away somewhere to safety while we continue shooting. Where did they all come from? There was so many, and I thought the prison had been basically cleared. What had happened? Then I notice the gate that was keeping a cluster of walkers locked in a space was somehow open. Who would have opened it and why? But I couldn’t think about it, not now. Too many were coming at us, we had to get to safety. T and Carol were on the other side of the courtyard, closer to another entrance I saw they could go for. I needed to get Lori and Carl out of here.

“Lori! Carl! Come on!” I shout to the side of me, running over to the entrance they’d all come out of with Hershel from the cell block. They follow me over and I usher them in, closing the door behind us to keep the walkers from following inside.

We make our way to the cell block but as we’re about to enter it, several walkers come out at us and we’re forced to go into the halls of the prison or the tombs as the others called them, closing the gate behind me, again, to keep these walkers from coming in too. As we’re making our way through, trying to find a safe spot, alarms start ringing throughout the prison. What was happening? The walkers and now the alarms? Someone was messing with us. Perhaps the prisoners had done it but then I thought how could they from being locked outside in the fenced entrance. How was this happening?

Carl was leading us through the tombs, though I had no idea where and I could’ve guessed he wasn’t entirely sure either when Lori suddenly stopped, leaning her side and arm against the wall letting out a moan of discomfort. 

“Hey, you gotta keep up.” I say, touching her back in comfort and urgency.

“Something’s not right.” She announces.

“Are you bit?” Carl asks distressingly.

“No, no, no. No.” she starts, turning to lean her back against the wall as I hold her sides in worry. “I think the baby’s coming.” She finishes when all of a sudden more walkers appear at the end of the hall from around the corner. 

“Turn back!” I shout as I help Lori off the wall and away as they approach us, supporting her as we walk quickly while Carl leads us again. She was going into labour. Shit.


	10. ten

We seem to get blocked at quite a few corners by walkers with Lori moaning in pain as we follow Carl all the while, but we eventually come across a boiler room that Carl ushers us into. I follow behind Lori, keeping close as she goes down a few steps and into the room, all of us staying far away from the door and from the sounds of it, the walkers go right past the room, even with Lori’s pained moans and gasps. Although, the alarms probably helped cover them.

“What are those alarms?” Lori heavily breathes, after a while before walking further into the room

“Don’t worry about it.” I reply, walking with her, touching her back in some effort of support and comfort.  
“Lori, let’s lay you down.” I suggest as she leans on a table, breathing.

“No. Baby’s coming now.” she declares.

“We have to get back to our cell block, and have Hershel help with-,” Carl worryingly starts but I stop him.

“No. We can’t risk getting caught out there. You’re gonna need to give birth to this baby here.” I state.

“Great.” She says before she starts hyperventilating.

“What is she doing? Cans he breathe?” Carl asks distressed.

“She’s fine.” I reassure him. “Come here. Let’s get your trousers off.” I urge as I unbutton her trousers and help her to the floor, laying her on her back.

I start pulling her trousers off as I look over to Carl. “You’re gonna need to help deliver your brother or sister. You up for it?” I ask him. He nods, looking a little shocked at what was now happening.

“I’m gonna examine you, see if you’re dilated.” I tell Lori, discarding her pants as she nods in confirmation.

“Do you know how?” Carl questions.

“My adoptive mother taught me about it all, but trust me, it’s my first time.” I answer before checking to see how dilated Lori was. There’s a short, silent pause as I do.

“I can’t tell.” I say calmly, though trying to hide my panic.

“I gotta push. I gotta push.” Lori declares. “Okay. Okay.” I say, trying to be as soothing as I can.

She brings herself to a sit before pulling herself up, with my help, against a wall. She holds onto some chains for support before she starts to push, letting out a pained cry. I’m holding her hips in support and then her hand as she assures me she’s okay after letting out her cry.

“You’re doing great, Lori. Just keeping doing it. Your body knows what to do. Let it do all the work.” I reassure her.

She carries on pushing, letting out gasps of pain while I rub her back before stopping to breathe again as I crouch down to see if anything’s happening down there. “Good. Good. You’re doing great.” I repeat.

Lori begins pushing again, straining through the pain but suddenly I see and feel blood come from her.

“Lori, stop! Don’t push! Something’s wrong!” I declare, seeing her blood all over my hand as she lets out an excruciating scream.

I help her to the floor, laying her on her back once again and she looks weakened and tired already. I was trying not to show it for both her and Carl but I was panicking. We’re both holding her hands, trying to keep her awake as Carl talks to her while I brush the hair out of her face

“Mom. Mom, look at me. Look at me. Keep your eyes open.” Carl orders.

“We have to get you back to Hershel.” I declare.

“I’m not gonna make it.” she weakly states as move back around to her crotch.

“Lori, with all this blood, I don’t even think you’re fully dilated yet. No amount of pushing is gonna help.” I explain, worryingly. Not being able to hide it too well anymore.

“I know what it means. And I’m not losing my baby. You’ve gotta cut me open.” She announces, breathing heavy.

“No. I can’t.” I retort, in slight shock.

“You don’t have a choice.” She replies.

“I’ll go for help. I can make it-,” Carl starts, getting up to leave.

“No!” she exclaims, stopping him.

“Look, I’m pretty sure Carol was the one that practised that. I- I only know the steps from what I’ve been told and taught, Lori. If i--,” I start.

“Y/N, please.” She breathes.

“I have no anaesthetic, no equipment.” I continue, starting to feel the rise of emotion in my eyes and hear it in my voice.

“You have a knife.” She points out.

“You won’t survive.” I say saddened.

“My baby has to survive. Please. My baby. You know as mother you want to do everything you can. Please. For all of us.” she weakly pleads. “Please, Y/N! Please.” she exclaims.

I shake my head, tears forming in my eyes as she pleads once more. I sigh, closing my eyes, collecting myself for what I’m about to have to do. I open them as I breath, lifting her top up over her belly, seeing her scar from birthing Carl, much like mine from Sophia.

“You see my old c-section scar?” she asks.

Looking at it daunts me and I shake my head once more. “I can’t.” I say again.

“You can. You have to.” She breathes, assuring me before turning to Carl, who was now back at her side.

“Carl? Baby, I don’t want you to be scared, okay? This is what I want. This is right. Now, you- you take care of your daddy for me, alright? And your little brother or sister. You take care of them.” She starts.

“You don’t have to do this.” He cries over her.

“You’re gonna be fine. You are gonna beat this world. I know you will. You are smart, and you are so strong, and you are so brave. And I love you.” She declares, tears forming in her own eyes.

“I love you, too.“ Carl sniffles.

“You gotta do what’s right, baby. Promise me you’ll always do what’s right. It’s so easy to do the wrong thing in this world. So don’t-- so if it feels wrong, don’t do it. Alright? If it feels easy, don’t do it. Don’t let the world spoil you.” She holds back her tears as she wipes Carl’s from his cheeks. “You’re so good. You’re my sweet boy. The best thing I ever did. I love you.” She cries as she pulls him down into an embrace, both of them crying and me as well as I watch and listen. “I love you. I love you, my sweet, sweet boy. I love you.” She continues as she cries. 

She eventually composes herself somewhat, kissing the side of Carl’s head, stroking it. “Okay. Okay, now. Okay.” she says, ushering him upwards before turning back to me.

“Y/N, when this is over, you’re gonna have to--,” she starts to explain. “Shhh!” I interject saying and gesturing, not being able to form words through my tears after hearing her with Carl and for what she was asking, but she carries on. “You have to do it. It can’t be Rick.” She states. I breathe, gathering myself, knowing there was no way out of this. I was going to have to do this, for Lori.

“Alright. Alright. It’s alright. It’s alright.” She mutters as I unsheathe my knife.

“I’ll look after the baby, Lori. I promise. We all will. We’ll make sure they have a life. Like we talked about at the farm, remember.” I assure her, wiping my tears away.

She looks at me with a small smile. “I know you will. I remember. It’s okay. Thank you, Y/N.” she says through her cries, before laying her head back down, looking to the ceiling. “Goodnight, love.” I hear her whisper to herself, probably to Rick for the last time.

I hold the knife at her belly, pausing while I say, “I’m sorry.” Before cutting across her scar, Lori letting out an almighty couple of screams while Carl pleads me to stop, saying I was killing her, before she passes out from the pain as I continue cutting.

“Carl, give me your hand.” I instruct. “What?” he asks. “Carl, please. I need you to keep the sac clean, okay? If I cut too deep, then I’m gonna cut the baby.” I explain.

He helps me as I try getting through to the baby.

“I see it. I see the uterus.” I announce. “I’m gonna pull the baby out.” I state.

“I can’t tell if this is the arm or the leg.” I add, thinking aloud, trying to focus on only this as I ready to get the baby out.

“Okay, I’m gonna pull the baby out now.” I declare, Carl nodding. 

I carefully pull the baby out, which is a girl I notice, bringing it into my arms but there’s no cries. I try gently flicking it’s feet, then gently tapping it’s chest. Nothing. I turn her over onto her front, supporting her as I then gently rub and tap her back when she finally breathes and cries. Carl takes his jacket off for me to wrap her in as I cut the umbilical cord and put my knife back into its belt holster. I wrap her up before rising to a stand.

“We have to go.” I sombrely announce.

“Well, we can’t just leave her here. She’ll turn.” Carl counters.

I look at Lori, saddened, not wanting to do it but I have to, it’s what she asked me to do. So, I reach for my knife again but Carl stops me.

“No.” he says. “Carl.” I reply, looking at him not wanting him to do it.

“She’s my mom.” He justifies, tears falling down his face as he unholsters his gun.

I look at him in shock and sorrow, but I don’t argue. It would have been the same if I were him. Hell, I was the same with Sophia, so I understood why he had to do it. I turn and leave the part of the room we were in for the door of the boiler room, to keep the baby away from the noise as much as I could and also because after it all, I couldn’t bring myself to see what Carl was having to do. The baby had quietened thankfully, seemingly going to sleep pretty fast which helped for when we had leave and make our way back. I pushed the door open a small crack to peer outside to see a couple walkers turn round the corner away from us and the direction of the cell block. I close it, turning around to go back to Carl when I hear the gunshot. He did it. I stand for a second, taking it in before I look around the corner to see Carl walking towards me but he just brushes past me for the exit, leaving the boiler room. He’d stopped crying. He now only wore a cold, distraught expression on his face and my heart broke at the sight. I followed him out the boiler room with a heavy heart, knowing I now had to face Rick with his baby in my arms instead of Lori’s.

As we walked back through the tombs, neither of us saying a word, all I could think was how Lori had told me she was scared before. That she saw this, her pregnancy, as a death sentence and my heart broke even more now knowing that she was right.

I could hear Rick barking orders as we stepped out of the exit door into the courtyard. Carl was now expressionless, as if he had turned numb from the whole experience while I was already welling up in anticipation of seeing Rick. They didn’t seem to notice we’d come out at first until the baby let out a little cry, turning their attention towards us. I didn’t see anyone else. I could only look at Rick, and his face just dropped from blind panic and anger to a broken realisation. He stared at us as I stuttered a little, my emotions running away with breath, not being able to form words as my lips and chin wobbled. Rick started coming towards us, losing his grip and dropping an axe he was holding in one of his hands. I stopped as I neared him while he began slowly pacing around, clearly not knowing what to do with himself after seeing what had clearly happened. He wasn’t taking his eyes off us and I could see the tears forming in his eyes and he shook his head a little in disbelief. He could barely speak; I heard his voice breaking as he stuttered the beginning of his words. 

“Where-- where is-- where is she?” he stutters. His emotions built up the longer he looked at me holding his baby in my arms and mine were too, crying as I watched him pace around, not being able to answer.

He moved forward to push past me towards the entrance we just came out of, obviously headed to find Lori but I stop him through my tears.

“No. Rick, no!” I exclaim, adjusting my hold on the baby so I can grab his arm.

He stops turning to look at me and when I see his face, that’s when I see him truly break. He turns back facing the door while next Carl, who was just staring at the ground in grief, as he lets out his cries. He looks around and at Carl, breaking down while saying no repeatedly as I stand there, crying myself, holding the baby to my chest not knowing what to do. Daryl slowly approached me slowly as the others looked on at us. He stood in front of me, touching my arm, stroking his hand up and around to the back of my neck, tilting my head slightly to bring his forehead against mine in comfort as I cry. I eventually turn myself to look back to Rick, who was now crying on the floor and in that moment I felt utterly helpless.


	11. eleven

“Rick?” Daryl spoke softly. 

“Rick, are ya with me? Rick?” he continued, crouched in front of a dazed and grief ridden Rick, waving his hand in front of him but receiving no response at all as Carl approached me. He stood in front of me, looking at me as if asking for the baby, who I hand over to him carefully, with my hands and arms still covered in Lori’s blood.

“Let me see the baby.” Hershel orders.

“What are we gonna feed it? We got anything a baby can eat?” Daryl questions as we approach him.

“The good news is she looks healthy. But she needs formula and soon, or she won’t survive.” Hershel announces looking the baby girl over.

“Nope. No way. Not her. We ain’t losing nobody else. I’m going for a run.” Daryl quickly replies.

“I’ll back you up.” I declare. “We’ll come with you.” Glenn adds, looking to Maggie.

“Alright. Think where we’re going.” Daryl says before turning to Beth to talk to her as Maggie touches my arm with Glenn at her side.

“You sure you’re up for this? You don’t have to go.” she asks.

“No. I gotta do it. I made a promise.” I state.

“Someone of ya get the fence. Too many pile up, we got ourselves a problem.” Daryl orders to the group, including Oscar and Axel, about the walkers now piling up because of the alarms. “Y/N, let’s go.” He calls as I hear the scrape of metal behind, turning to see Rick wielding the axe he dropped now walking towards the entrance into the prison.

“Rick!” I call to stop him, but he doesn’t stop or turn an inch, he just marches inside the prison.

“Someone get the gate. We’re gonna lose the light, we gotta go, come on.” Daryl shouts already headed to his bike before we jog to follow him.

“There’s a Piggly Wiggly on 85.” Glenn points out as we all jog.

“No, the baby section’s been cleared. Lori asked me to keep an eye out. I haven’t had much luck.” Maggie counters as we approach the cars and bike.

“Is there any place that hasn’t been completely looted?” Daryl asks.

“You know, I saw some signs for a shopping centre just north of here.” I announce.

“Yeah, we saw that too but there’s too much debris on the road. A car will never get through there.” Maggie replies as she gets a backpack out one of the cars.

“I can take one of ya.” Daryl says, putting his poncho on from his bike. “I’m coming with you.” I quickly respond.

“Y/N, after all that. Are you really sure? Glenn or I could go.” Maggie offers.

“I wanna go. For Lori, I have to.” I answer softly just as Daryl starts the ignition on his bike. Maggie hands me the backpack and I strap it to my back as I walk over and climb on the back of the bike, holding onto Daryl’s waist before he drives off with Oscar and Axel opening and closing the gates as we leave the prison.

For the whole run, Daryl barely said one word to me, but I was grateful that he knew I just wanted the silence, that and it was a little hard to speak on the bike anyways. But he was pretty much the only one who knew I just liked to keep to myself when shit like this happened. Knowing he is around is enough for me; it’s all I need from him.

At the shopping mall, Daryl had asked me about what happened, but I didn’t divulge much, not really wanting to recount the memory of what happened to Lori. He told me about the other prisoner, one that they thought had died, how he caused it all. I asked about Carol and T, having thought back and noticed they weren’t outside when re-joined the group. I could see the upset in his eyes when speaking of Carol; they’d become good friends over the eight months from what I’d gathered and seen, so he didn’t say much either, just that they didn’t make it. Three of us were now gone, all within a day. Even after so long, I still hadn’t completely gotten used to losing people, those so close to us anyway. 

The shopping mall had been a dead end. So, we decided to scout the surrounding area, drive around; see what we could find and after a while we managed to come across this abandoned day care centre I spotted. I pointed it out to Daryl for him to pull up to and we parked out front, Daryl killing the engine as I hopped off the back.

“Stay tight. Company could be close.” He says, grabbing his crossbow as I approach the gate.

We made our way through what appeared to be their garden playground towards the building, coming up to one of the windows. I looked inside and saw no walkers, so I proceeded to break the window with the end of my katana’s handle as Daryl looked out behind me, covering my entry into the day. The place was a mess, which was to be expected, but as I looked around I noticed that one of the walls in the room was covered in small, cut outs of paper hands. I stepped towards it, as I heard Daryl come in through the window, and saw they all had names on them of the kids that had been coming here before. Then that’s when I saw a hand with the name Sophia and I found myself staring, in thought of sad memories of my girl and what was now in store for Lori’s, when a hand lightly touches my shoulder. I look to my side, now staring back at Daryl. He moves his hand up to the back of my neck again, but instead of resting his forehead against mine, like he did earlier, he brought his lips. Planting a light kiss on my skin, he brings me into a hold, wrapping his arms around me as I do the same, resting my head on his shoulder just for a moment.

We’d been sweeping the place, room to room separately, and I’d found a couple bottles for formula and some diapers and blankets when I suddenly heard a scratching noise from a nearby room. I turned to see Daryl approaching towards the entrance of the room the noise was coming from as I stepped forward to the other side of the door. The top half of the door was open, whereas the bottom was still latched shut. With the torch in his mouth, Daryl opened the bottom half slowly and stepped inside to the corner, nodding for me to open the cupboard the noise was coming from as I came inside also. I stood in front of it, hand ready to open it as Daryl stood poised wielding his crossbow at the cupboard ready for whatever was inside. I opened it quickly and a possum let out a hiss juts before it bolt went through it.

“Hello, dinner.” Daryl says, the torch still in his mouth as he goes to grab it. 

“That’s going in your bag.” I reply, turning to look through the other cupboards in the room. Normally I would have at least scoffed in amusement at the remark he made but I wasn’t in the mood for jokes, even small ones but as I opened a couple cupboards and saw two large tins of powered baby formula, the smallest arch of a smile crept onto my face finally seeing something we’d come for. I packed them in my bag and when I turned to see Daryl, he was holding a soft toy doll I didn’t notice before. It was an endearing thought from him I hadn’t even thought about. 

“You got formula?” he asks. 

“Yeah, two tins. Should last a while.” I reply.

“Good. Let’s go, gonna be dark before we even get back to the prison. Come on.” He states, gesturing me to follow as he leaves the room.

He was right. When we got back to the prison it was already night but Axel and Oscar were still at the fence entrance, ready to let us in as Glenn took out a couple walkers too close for comfort up in the guard tower, as we rode straight in.

We didn’t mess around outside, not wasting a second to get inside to the others, to the baby. It had to be starving. As we came into the cellblock, I made my way to the table to assemble a bottle with the formula as Daryl walked towards Carl, who was holding the crying new-born. While I made the bottle, Maggie and Beth were hovering around me looking at what we’d found as Glenn and the prisoners came back into the cellblock. I heard the baby’s cries somewhat quieten and when I looked up I saw she was in Daryl’s arms now. When I stepped towards them with the bottle, Daryl held his arm and hand out for me to pass it over. stood next to Carl, I looked on at Daryl a little shocked he’d taken on this role, now shushing the baby softly in comfort, urging her to take the bottle as he began to feed her. She took to it quickly and watching Daryl take care of her in the smallest way, was something I wasn’t expecting but admired all the same. This man cared a lot more than he led on and when he looked up at us all with a smile, landing on me, I mirrored it. This baby may have lost it’s mother, but it had a whole family to love it in return and only then when I saw the smile on Daryl’s face did I start to believe the promise I had made to Lori. We could give this baby girl a life, all we had to do was care and love her, all we had to do was try.

“She got a name yet?” Daryl asks Carl, snapping me from my thoughts as I stared with a smile.

“N-not yet, but I was thinking- maybe Sophia?” Carl began, turning to face me with a sad expression but endearment in his eyes. I placed my hand on his shoulder, a small, sad but honoured smile etching my face before he continued. “Then there’s Carol, too. And- Amy. Jacqui. Patricia. Or Lori. I don’t know.” He finishes, looking away looking totally deflated at the mention of his mom. I bring my arm around to his other shoulder, pulling him into my side in comfort. 

Daryl looks back to the baby in his arms, regaining a smile as he watched her feed. “You like that? Huh? Little ass-kicker?” he speaks softly to the baby girl before he looks back up at us all. “Right? That’s a good name, right?” he asks with a smirk, earning laughs from us all. “Little ass-kicker? You like that, huh? You like that, sweetheart?” he continues as we chuckle. I smile at the sight, still holding onto Carl as I look down to see him smiling too which I’m glad to see. After everything today, it was good to see he could manage to laugh and smile, even for a moment.

Not long after, I break away from Carl, walking over to Glenn and Maggie after only just noticing Rick wasn’t among us. “Where’s Rick?” I quietly ask Glenn.

“In the tombs.” He answers. “Still? Anybody tried getting him out of there?” I question.

“I did. He made it clear he didn’t want to leave.” He replies. I nod in understanding, knowing that no one was going to get through to Rick, not now anyway. After Sophia, I was an inconsolable mess that couldn’t see past the end of my sword. I went into the woods, killing anything I could find. The tombs were Rick’s woods and he just needed a little time before we approached him.

“If he doesn’t come back during the night, I’ll go looking for him in the morning.” I state as Hershel comes over.

“In the meantime, perhaps you should clean yourself up. It’s been a long day for us all and what you did couldn’t have been easy. Get some rest. If Rick stays out there, we’re going to need you and Daryl.” Hershel chimes in upon his approach. 

I look down at myself and see Lori’s dried blood all over my arms, hands and clothes still. I must have looked a total mess; I’d forgotten about it to be honest, but it suddenly became the only thing I wanted to do. Washing off all this blood and dirt would help me, hopefully, to start forgetting this traumatising day. At least I hoped anyway. I looked back up to Hershel, nodding in reply, tapping his arm as I walked off into the cells, grabbing some fresh clothes and soap before making my way back through and to the showers.

Discarding my clothes to the floor felt good, ridding the blood cursed items off me, a problem for tomorrow I thought seeing as the blood was already dried and leaving them through the night wouldn’t hurt. However, the shower felt better. Washing the blood off my skin did feel like a little weight of grief being lifted, although at the same time I felt sad to do it. The last part of Lori now washed away. No. It wasn’t the last part of her, I couldn’t think like that. She lived on in our memories and a part of her would always be in the baby girl. That was forever, no matter who raised her.

Out of the shower, I was buttoning my jeans when I heard my name being called from behind at the entrance. I immediately knew it was Daryl. I had my bra on but no top, so I grabbed my towel to cover my top half; all my scars on show and even though he knew about them and he had his own, he’d never seen them. I turned to see him stepping through into the room, his eyes quickly glazing over the towel that I was holding with one hand over my chest, draping down my front. 

“I came to see if ya was alright.” He states softly.

I give him a small, yet probably unconvincing smile. “I- I’m fine.” I answer quietly. “Besides, you should be checking on Carl, not me. Kid lost his mom today. And his dad’s not doing so great.” I add as he moves forward closer towards me.

“Yeah, well, he’s with the baby and the others. He seems alright. ‘Bout alright as you could be.” He replies, now standing in front of me.

I nod, creating a pause, looking up at his face. “You’re good with the baby. Your smile lit me up a little, I have to admit. It took me by surprise slightly at first but then I remembered how determined you were to find Sophia. How you were after we found her. Then I thought it wasn’t much of a surprise at all.” I explain but he doesn’t respond. He just chews the inside of his cheek, clearly not knowing what to say, as he looks down. 

“You’d make a great father you know.” I announce causing him to look back up and scoff lightly at the remark. “You would. Whether you believe it or not. You care, a lot. It’s a big thing. And it’s one of the things I love about you.” I add.

I don’t realise I’ve said it until it’s already come out, but I find myself not regretting it in the slightest; it was true. Daryl just stares at me, intensely, both of us not breaking eye contact. I go to say something else, parting my lips but no words come out, so I stop and just let out a small sigh of breath. He looks down and I follow his eyeline, watching him take my free hand at my side in his.

“You’re hidin’.” He says. I look back up, meeting his gaze. “What?” I reply in confusion.

“One of my things, is that ya strong. You’re a survivor. But you’re hidin’ a part of ya that makes ya that way.” he elaborates, bringing his hand up my arm, across my shoulder and on top of my other hand. I look down at our hands and the towel that was covering my scars which I knew was what he was talking about. I take a small breath before looking back up to him, holding his stare. I feel his hand come off mine, now stroking down my arm as I let go of the towel. It piles at my feet and Daryl moves his hand slowly across onto my waist. I’m still watching his face, but he was now looking at my stomach, where his fingers began tracing my scars that decorated my belly. His touch was soft and slow, caring but his skin also a little rough; I liked that contrast. I closed my eyes, savouring the feeling of his touch, something that would never grow old I thought. I wanted it for however long I had, and I wished for a lifetime of it. 

I felt him trace my old c-section birthing scar just before each of his hands moved to my sides, resting on my hips, his grip urging me slightly to turn around, to which I complied with my eyes still closed. He continued tracing my scars on my back, still following my long scarred wounds and circling the cigarette burns that scorned my body. Then I felt his body press against me, his hand brushing my hair off my left shoulder away from my neck while the other rested on my stomach, holding me close against him.

“Ya beautiful, Y/N.” he whispers in my ear before kissing my neck causing a quiet gasp from my lips in pleasure. I tilted my head slightly in response, granting him more access to my neck. He stroked my upper arm and shoulder, nibbling at my neck before I turn myself around, wrapping my arms around his neck. Not hesitating, I breach the small gap between our lips, kissing him to which he responds to immediately, deepening the kiss. It’s passionate, running my hands over his neck as he strokes my cheek, working his hands around my body. The intensity and Daryl pressed against me causes me to step backwards, Daryl following and urging the motion until I’m pushed against the cold tile wall. The cold sensation sending a shiver through me just as Daryl’s touch and kisses do, making me feel hot inside, driving me crazy for him. I bring my hands to his angel winged jacket, pushing it off his shoulders as he lets his arms fall before shedding his jacket to the floor. I had started unbuttoning his shirt, wild with passion and want in the moment when we hear Glenn.

“Hey, Y/N. You still in her-,” Glenn begins asking as he walks into the room, holding a towel. “Woah, um- okay-- shit, I’ll just wait- er, um-,” he babbles upon spotting us, not knowing where to look with Daryl staying pressed against me as if to keep my chest covered from him. “Get outta here.” Daryl exclaims.

“Yeah, right- I’ll- um- just-- yeah.” Glenn stutters as he leaves the room. I laugh at the encounter, entertained by Glenn’s response at seeing us as Daryl looks back, clearly not as amused as I am but he lets out a little snort with a smirk eventually.

“Perhaps the showers aren’t the best place for privacy.” I whisper with a grin.

“Mmhmm.” Daryl groans before pushing himself off me, walking over to my clothes and handing me my clean shirt. He buttons up his, peeling his jacket off the floor as I put mine on. I gather my few things I had brought in with me before coming up next to Daryl, planting a kiss on his cheek. “Another time. And probably another place.” I joke with a smile, as he grunts, leading him out the room.


	12. twelve

After last night, Daryl had momentarily allowed me to forget about the day’s trauma but by the morning the feelings had come back, waking up knowing Lori wouldn’t be here. The mood was especially sombre at breakfast; no one talked and Carl still looked broken, understandably. The fact Rick wasn’t back probably didn’t help and I was planning to go after him once I finished my food before I went on a run for the day with Glenn and Maggie for supplies. I was sat on some stairs below Daryl, in between his legs as we all ate around the cellblock when we suddenly heard Rick.

“Everybody okay?” he questioned at the cellblock door, creaking it open to come in.

“Yeah, we are.” Hershel answers. 

“What about you?” I ask.

“Cleared out the boiler block.” He announces approaching Carl at the table with some of the others, avoiding the question.

“How many were there?” Daryl questions, obviously in reference to walkers.

“I don’t know. Dozen, two dozen. I have to get back. Just wanted to check on Carl.” He declares, patting Carl’s shoulder.

“Rick, we can handle taking out the bodies. You don’t have to.” Glenn states.

“No, I do.” Rick retorts before walking over to Daryl and me. “Everyone have a gun and a knife?” He questions.

“Yeah. We’re running low on ammo, though.” Daryl answers.

“Glenn, Maggie and me are planning on making a run this afternoon. They found a phone book. Some places we can hit, look for bullets and formula. Allows us to mark the places down we’re going in case something goes wrong too, but it should be an easy run.” I announce.

“Cleared out the generator room. Axel’s there trying to fix it. Case of emergency, we’ll sweep the lower levels as well.” Daryl adds, filling him in on the day’s plans.

“Good.” Rick simply responds before marching out the cellblock.

“Rick!” I call after him before he closes the cell door behind him, walking off into the halls, ignoring my call. The room goes silent again as everyone continues finishing off their breakfast. 

After a moment, I stand up from the stairs, discarding my bowl on the table as I take my last mouthful, heading to leave out the cellblock.

“Y/N.” Hershel calls, turning my attention back to the group. “Bring him back.” he continues. “I’ll try.” I answer before closing the cell door.

I made my way through the halls into the tombs, looking for Rick but I figure I’d start with the obvious, where Lori died. I didn’t exactly want to go back there but I was sure that’s where he’d be considering he had said he’d cleared the boiler block which meant he most likely found where it had happened. Upon entering the boiler room, I come to the stairs and look around to see Rick holding his gun, but he holsters it as I walk down and stand before him in silence. I lean against a table as he stands at the end of it, neither of us speaking until I break it.

“She was sorry for the things that happened. She told me that. She planned on telling you.” I pause but he doesn’t look up at me, just to the floor. “Take your time. Whatever you need. You carried all of them back there. You didn’t let them give up. You got them all here.” I continue.

“It’s not enough. It’s not safe enough.” He blurts.

“There isn’t anywhere else. Not places with good people anyway. I know you want to get away from this. But you’ve run already.” I retort.

“I got a call.” He chimes. I’m confused as to how and what he’s talking about but I hide it as to not patronise him. “What?” I ask plainly.

“Someone called on this phone.” He answers, picking up a phone on the table and placing it in front of me. “A woman. She was young. She was part of a group. She said they had a safe place.” He adds.

I pick up the phone to see if I can hear a dial tone, anything but as I put it to my ear I hear nothing. I didn’t want to believe it, but he’d clearly lost his mind a little, his grief causing him to start imagining things.

“They said they were just dialling numbers and I picked up. She said they’d be calling back.” I look at him in pity but conceal it, putting the phone down as he steps closer. “If it sounds right, I want to talk to them into taking us in.” he adds.

I didn’t want to provoke him in anyway, so I indulge slightly. “Did she say where they were?” I ask.

“No, but it doesn’t matter. If it’s safe, we’ll get there. Don’t tell the rest of the group. Not yet.” He orders, stepping back.

“I can sit here with you.” I state after a pause. “No.” he plainly dismisses.

I nod, sighing, knowing I’m not going to convince him to leave this room or let me stay. “Alright.” I say, pushing off from the table to leave. I stop at the top of the few stairs, looking back over to Rick. “Just remember we’re here for you, Rick.” I say before walking out.

Coming back to the cellblock, everyone was still there but getting ready for the day ahead. Looking over to me coming in alone before continuing with what they were all doing. I begin walking over to Maggie and Glenn, who were marking out the places we were going to hit for Daryl to see and know, when Hershel grabs my attention.

“Hey. So, you didn’t get through to him?” he questions.

“No. He’s a little far gone. He needs time. He’s imagining things. He was talking about someone calling him on a phone, talking to them about a safe place for us all. But it had no dial tone, nothing. He wanted to be alone but I’m not sure he should. Maybe have a go yourself. Perhaps if we’re persistent, he might come around. Come back.” I explain.

He nods. “I’ll see what I can do.” He states before I continue my walk towards the others.

“Hey, you ready to go?” Maggie asks. 

“Yep. We know our route?” I question.

“Yeah. Let’s go.” Glenn answers before grabbing his gear to leave, Maggie following. 

“Hey, look out for Carl. He may need a friend. Or just someone to talk to him.” I ask of Daryl, earning a nod and a mumble ‘mmhmm’ of understanding. “Be careful out there.” He says.

“Always am, Dixon.” I tease, nudging his arm before leaving to follow Glenn and Maggie outside to the cars.

The run was going well so far. We’d hit a couple of the first places with no trouble, not finding much but it was going smoothly which was always a good thing. We pulled up to our next place to scavenge; getting out the car I look around to see no walkers and apart from wreckages, it was clear. 

“Clear outside.” I announce walking back to the car to get my backpack out. 

“Alright, let’s take a look.” Glenn replies from the other side of the truck with Maggie.

As I come around to their side, I see the two of them sharing a deep kiss and take the moment to tease. “If I’d known I was travelling with star crossed lovers I would have stayed back for sweeping the tombs.” I joke, smirking to myself, earning a slight chuckle from them both.

“Like you can talk, getting it on in the showers with Daryl.” Glenn teases with a laugh.

“Yeah, punk.” I start, moving towards him. “At least I didn’t turn into chattering monkey at the sight of you two.” I retort, grabbing him into a headlock, playfully, rubbing my knuckles on his head.

He breaks from my hold, Maggie laughing as she looks on at us both. “Yeah, well, that was different. I felt like I was walking in on my sister getting laid or something.” He defends.

“Getting laid?” I repeat in amusement. I scoff. “We didn’t get that far before your annoying little ass showed up.” I continue, playfully punching his arm as he tried to dodge it but failed.

Still chuckling, Maggie chimes in. “You two really are like siblings.”

“Yeah, he is like an annoying little brother sometimes.” I joke with a smirk.

“Alright. Let’s just do this shall we?” Glenn says, getting the bolt cutters out the car as Maggie and I share a chuckle. We stand next to each other in front of the building entrance as Glenn cuts open the chain. “I’ll go in, you both stay here, like before.” He states. “Yes, boss.” I mock, smiling. “Shut up.” He chuckles before he opens the doors to the building and birds suddenly fly out making us all jump. Glenn takes a breath before heading inside, torch in hand. Maggie and I look in from the outside, watching him enter, shining our torches inside.

“Glenn, get that duck.” Maggie calls. “What?” he calls back out as I see what Maggie was looking at. It was a soft toy duck, clearly in mind for the baby.

“Get that duck.” She repeats, smiling. “You serious?” he chuckles.

“Yeah, come on. A kid growing up in a prison could use some toys.” I chime in.

“Alright, then.” He says, grabbing the duck. “Seems good for you to come in now. Come on, let’s do a sweep.” he adds and we both step forward to join him inside.

We all look around different areas of the building and making my way through my aisles and area, I come across a ton of formula and I thank the stars at the sight. It was like we’d just won the lottery and I couldn’t wait to tell them; this would keep the baby fed for a long while. It was a huge win. It was shaping up to be a pretty good run. Coming out the building I found Glenn and Maggie waiting outside, looking over what each other found.

“We just hit the powder formula jackpot.” I announce walking out the doors towards the car. “Oh, thank god.” Maggie exclaims as I pack all the tins of formula into Glenn’s basket on the ground.

“We got some beans, batteries, cocktail wieners, many mustards. Loads of stuff.” He states as I come back up to a stand.

“Great. It’s a straight shot back to the prison from here. Probably make it in time for dinner.” I announce before starting to walk to the front of the car to get in the other side.

“I like the quiet. Back there, back home. You can always hear ‘em outside the fence no matter where ya are.” Maggie says grabbing the basket while Glenn puts the gear back in the car as I open the door on the opposite side to get in. 

“And where is it y’all good people call it home?” a man’s voice shouts out to us from behind, but I instantaneously knew that voice. It was Merle. All three of us pointed our guns at the voice, I figured a sword wouldn’t cut it with Merle right now, as I came round to the back of the car next to Maggie. 

“Merle?” Glenn says, realising who it was.

Merle laughs, seeing Glenn also, surprisingly putting his gun down on the floor in response. “Wow.” He exclaims before looking across to Maggie and me. “And lookie here. It’s my favourite darlin’ Samurai too.” he chuckles, beginning to walk towards us with his hand and blade up in the air. His face was bloodied for some reason which seemed odd, it looked as if he had been in a fight but with who? And why was he out here alone?

“Hey, back the hell up!” Maggie shouts.

“Oh- okay, okay, honey! Jesus.” He retorts.

“What are you doing out here Merle?” I ask, still aiming my gun at him like the other two.

“Came out lookin’ for you, girly. Wanted to join ya looking for Daryl. I see you already found the group. So, tell me. My brother alive?” he questions.

“Yeah, he is.” I answer. 

He nods, smiling, looking extremely relieved at the news and I wonder if he is genuinely pleased. He looked it.

“Hey. You, er- take me to him and I’ll call it even on everythin’ that happened up there in Atlanta. Not hard feelin’s. huh?” He directs to Glenn, who pauses thinking.

“We’ll tell Daryl you’re here and he’ll come out to meet you.” He announces.

“Oh, hold on. Just- hold up.” Merle begins to protest, taking steps forward. “Woah, whoa.” Glenn exclaims, gesturing for him to stop. 

“Hold up, hold up! Hey, the fact we found each other is a miracle. Come on, now.” Merle argues.

“Then why’d you come out after me if you thought that way. Why leave Woodbury? You didn’t seem to want to before.” I question.

“I just realised I wanted to see my baby brother more than stay there a bit late is all, girly. Now, y’all can trust me.” he explains.

“You trust us. You stay here.” Glenn sternly states. Merle doesn’t respond, just instead scoffs, looking a little flustered.

I drop my gun, holding it at my side as step towards him to stand in front of him. “What changed your mind, Merle?” I ask.

He steps forward too, closer to me. “Well, girly, maybe it was you.” He answers, pausing a moment, before suddenly grunting as he swings his metal arm contraption at my head. The side of it hitting me with force, sending me to the ground before I could even react and the last thing I hear is shots accompanied by the feeling of pain before everything goes black.


	13. thirteen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning - chapter contains sexual assault, not overly explicit

Waking up feeling dazed was a slight understatement. My head felt like it was on fire it was throbbing so bad. Merle had hit me pretty hard, so I wasn’t exactly surprised when I woke up in a completely new surroundings, although I had a pretty good guess where we’d ended up. I’d woke to the sound of Merle shouting but he wasn’t in our room. I looked around to see I was in some kind of makeshift room to hold people with Maggie, both of us strapped to chairs by a table. Glenn wasn’t here but that’s when I realised Merle’s shouting was on the other side of one of the walls. Maggie looked extremely worried having been listening to them the whole time no doubt, tears in her eyes, looking to me as I woke up, helpless. Merle’s words started to clear up and I could hear him interrogating, obviously Glenn, wanting to know where Daryl was, where Rick was. We hear Merle suddenly grunt in pain and what sounds like him slamming his arm on a table in anger. Glenn had clearly dealt a blow to him somehow but then we heard hard and loud blows coming down on someone and it wouldn’t have been Glenn dealing them this time. Merle starts saying how he wants to know where the group is, where our camp is, still continuing to beat on Glenn. Maggie sobs while all we can do is sit here, strapped down listening to it.

Merle continues to interrogate Glenn, beating him for quite a while but from what I can make out he doesn’t let up, he doesn’t tell him where the group is. Much to Merle’s annoyance and I hear him leave. But it wasn’t long until we heard him burst back into Glenn’s room next door with the sound of snarls echoing through the walls. He’d brought a walker into his cell. He was crazy. Maggie had a look of panic on her face, realising the same thing as Merle began demanding answers again on the group’s whereabouts. Glenn still didn’t let up. He’d slammed the door after leaving but the snarls continued; he’d let the walker lose in his room. All we could was Glenn grunting and shouting as he fought the walker off. He had to have been tied up like us but it sounded as if he might have broken free from his chair somehow. Things were being knocked over, broken, thrown by the sounds of things but soon after, it all stopped. I just hoped he killed it and not the other way around. Just then, he screamed out. He was alive. But was he hurt? Bit? I didn’t like not knowing and Maggie looked as if she was about to burst into tears. It made me think when Merle was going to come in our room, what he was going to do with us. I looked around for anything in the room I could possibly move to, to try and break free, to get a weapon, anything, but there was nothing. Our room was empty apart from the table and chairs and there was nothing I could try and cut the tape on. It was just a waiting game. 

Not long after, our door creaked open suddenly, both of us looking up quickly to see who it was. I expected Merle but was faced with the Governor, now shutting the creaking door as he slowly moved forward to stand before us at the other side of the table, holding my katana. Unsheathing it, he placed the case in the middle of the table as he held the sword in his hand, beginning to creep his way around the table behind us. He stops behind me and I feel him lower his head to mine.

“Don’t try anything stupid, alright.” The Governor almost whispers to me but loud enough for Maggie to hear next to me before he suddenly cuts the tape that attached me to the chair. He moved over to Maggie, doing the same but also cutting the tape around her hands, unlike with me, before making his way back around to the front of the table.

“What? I don’t get my hands cut free. That’s hardly fair.” I calmly point out to see how he’d respond.  
“Well, I just know you’re not shy to use this sword of yours is all.” he answers as he begins to pull his chair out but stops.

“May I?” he asks, as if to put on some façade of politeness. It had to be Maggie; it certainly wasn’t for me but neither of us respond. I instead hold a stern stare, waiting for whatever bullshit was going to sprout out of this man’s mouth, while Maggie sat crossing her arms, not daring to show the man any sign of emotion as she looked on at him. “Thank you.” He says, even with our lack of answer, sitting down at the table, putting the sword on it next to it’s case.

“We’ll take you back to your people, explain this was all just a misunderstanding. You tell us where they are and we’ll drive you there.” He explains. There it was: the bullshit. Did he think we were stupid? Especially after hearing Merle with Glenn. God, I forgot how much I hated this man. 

“I want to talk to Glenn.” Maggie states as I hold my stare and silence.

“I can’t allow that. Your people are dangerous. Handcuffed my man to a roof. Mutilated his hand.” He declares. “I don’t know anything about that, I weren’t there.” Maggie retaliated calmly, shaking her head.

“I was. And he asked me to. Mutilate his hand, that is. He didn’t ask me to stay though, but I did. And he left me. Merle’s the one that’s dangerous.” I add.

“I know you having a feeling of dislike for me and a lack of general respect for what we have here. I don’t expect anything from you.” He directs to me, before turning his attention to Maggie. “Look, you just tell us where they are and we’ll bring them here. you’ll be safe, I promise. All of you.” He continues.

Maggie turns to look at me, unconvinced and I’m glad to see it as we both, again, say nothing. “No? Fine.” He starts, leaving a pause. “Let’s try something else, huh?” he suggests a little eerily looking at us both, calm but yet with a weird look in his eyes I didn’t like.

“Maggie, is it? Stand up, please.” He asks but she doesn’t move, just turns her head to look away from him. He leans forward, his expression turning to a dark, cold stare.

“Stand up.” He repeats before she eventually complies, rising to a stand.

There’s pause as he looks at her. “Take off your shirt.” He orders.

I look at him in disturbance and anger. “No.” sternly answers. 

“Take off your shirt, or I’ll bring Glenn’s hand in here.” he says all but too coolly, sitting back in his chair like what he was asking was reasonable. I was in shock that the Governor had taken this turn and I didn’t know what to say. Maggie removed her top after a moment of worry in what would have been a thought of Glenn at the threat. She stood there in her bra and it enraged me; I couldn’t imagine how she felt. 

He held his hands out as if disappointed. “Go on.” He says.

I could see the emotions building up in Maggie, clearly so uncomfortable but not wanting anything to happen to Glenn. This was so wrong.

“You’re sick.” I spit at him but he ignores me, glued to Maggie as she removes her bra but covers herself with her hands and arms. He rises from his chair, creeping his way around the table to Maggie’s side as he removes his weapon belt. I didn’t like the look in his eyes one bit, nor the intent I was sure he had. When he stood at her side, bringing his hands up to her shoulders, he began smelling her hair and touching her back and it made me snap.

“Don’t you touch her!” I exclaim, standing and lunging around Maggie towards him to knock him away, to do anything I could but he’s quick to block me. He strikes me across the face, sending me to floor as I smack my head against the steel wall but not enough to knock me out, just enough for it to hurt like hell.

“Stay down! I told you not to try anything stupid!” he shouts just before he grabs Maggie by the neck, slamming her down to the table. Her cheek and front pressed against it as he towered over her, small cries escaping her. I see my katana is still on the table and bring myself to a stand before quickly moving towards the table past them to somehow get it, but I feel a boot kick my back just before I reach the table, again sending me to the floor. I roll over, letting out a cough being winded slightly, but the Governor was now over me, pulling me up slightly by my top before bringing his fist down to punch my face. He repeats himself, dealing me another blow before letting go of his grip on me, leaving me to spit blood onto the floor. I hear him grab the sword, the scrape sounding familiar before he walks over to the door and I move my head to follow him. He chucks the sword out the room, slamming it immediately after.

“If you don’t wanna talk. I guess I’ll just have to make you.” He exclaims, marching his way back to Maggie. 

I didn’t know what to do but I knew I didn’t want whatever he had in mind to happen to Maggie. He resumed his hold on her, slamming her back down to the table a second time. I could her cries as he began fumbling with his belt and I panicked, doing the only thing I could think of doing in that moment, having run out of options.

“Wait, stop! Not her!” I call out, standing up. He looks at me, slight confusion in his expression. “Let her go. You don’t know her. I don’t like you and you don’t like me. I know you want to hurt me. So do it. To me, not her. Just- let her go.” I breathe.

The Governor holds his position over Maggie, staring at me for what feels like minutes before pulling her up and discarding her to the side, throwing her at the wall where she curled up against it covering her chest, clearly shaken. He moved towards me, sinisterly, before grabbing my arm and slamming me down onto the table like he did with Maggie, towering over me just the same.

“So are you gonna talk?” he questions, his manor changing from erratic to calm as he spoke quietly.

“Do whatever you’re gonna do, then go to hell.” I reply coldly, matching his quiet tone.

He brings his hand to the side of my face, slowly stroking my hair out of the way before he lowers himself to my ear.

“You think I want to hurt you. I didn’t. I do now.” he whispers just as he brings his arm around to the table, grabbing something off it. Sliding it off the table in his hand, I see it’s my katana’s casing and it doesn’t take me but a second to realise what he was about to do. My breathing starts to become heavy and I can still hear Maggie’s cries although I can’t see her. He suddenly rips my shirt from the back, tearing it off me as my hands were still firmly taped together before he began to unbutton my jeans. I felt frozen having this similar feeling of unwanted weight on top of me, much like that of stepdads. The feeling of being that thirteen year old girl again being ignited within me. Maggie cries started getting louder while he pulled my jeans down, followed by my pants slightly, as all the while I remained silent, trying to leave myself. An attempt to go numb, to not feel the pain I was about to endure.

“Please! Stop! I-I’ll- I’ll tell you where the group is!” Maggie suddenly exclaims.

“No, Maggie! Don’t say a word.” I quickly retaliate.

“If she doesn’t talk, I’ll do it.” the Governor says but I don’t respond to him, I instead speak to Maggie who was now hysterically crying.

“Don’t say anything, Maggie. Just- just look away, alright.” I order, tears forming in my eyes before I heard a whimper of ‘I’m sorry’ from her. I knew whatever we did, the Governor wasn’t to be trusted and I had to stop him from doing this to her. It would have haunted her, like my past had me. That’s why it had to be me; I knew how to switch off. I could handle it. That’s what I told myself, just before the Governor whispered in my ear again.

“I hope this hurts.” He says wickedly.

Then that’s when I feel it. I gasp in pain at the rough force but try to cover it, not wanting to give him the satisfaction of anything but it hurt like hell. Whimpers escaped my lips as he continually used my katana’s case as his weapon in this cruel, sick display, grunting with every forceful push. Tears were running down my cheeks, but the only cries heard were from Maggie, who I hoped was turned away. I just closed my eyes, bearing the pain, trying to go somewhere else, to go numb, anything. I just wished for it to be over.

I couldn’t tell you how long it lasted. I didn’t want to know either. I’d blocked it all out eventually. The feeling of him over me, what he was doing, the smell of him, the sound of him, Maggie’s cries, everything. And I was glad for it, but I knew it was something I was going to have to live with forever. I was just going to have to bury like I did before. When he finally stopped, I felt the retraction and he the feel of him pulling my pants up back up into place but leaving my jeans at my ankles. The feeling repulsed me, but I didn’t move. His weight peeled off me and he was panting slightly from what he’d done. He wasn’t pushed against me anymore, but I could feel him behind me, his presence just standing there looking at me. I was still pressed against the table; I couldn’t even pull my jeans back up with hands still tied, but I moved lowered myself onto one of the chairs, looking down all the while.

“If you don’t start talking. I’ll come back and do the same thing to your friend here. With pieces of Glenn as encouragement.” The Governor announces as he made his way to the door, taking my katana case with him.

Opening the door, he stopped, looking back over to us. I lifted my head slightly to look at him. Seeing his face just infuriated me. I didn’t feel broken. Or sad. Or hurt. Just mad. I was going to make him suffer. Somehow. “I’ll let you think on that.” He added before shutting the door. 

Maggie was at my side in an instant, crouching in front of me in the chair. Her cries had stopped but she still had the tears in her eyes. “Y/N. I-I’m so sorry. Why’d you do that?” she asked as she fiddled with my torn shirt, dangling at my front.

“You didn’t deserve to live with that. I already have before.” I reply causing her to stop fiddling and gently turn my face to look at her.

“You didn’t either.” She states, looking straight into my eyes. I don’t respond, not knowing what to say. I see she had at some point put her own bra and top back on as she carried on fiddling with my shirt, taking it off me completely. It was ripped and torn massively, so she tried wrapping the fabric around my bra to cover my chest, but it was in tethers and wasn’t holding. She was getting frustrated it wasn’t working, grunting in annoyance as tears fell down her face. I grab her hands gently, stopping her, before she brought me into an hug, both of us holding each other tight in comfort.

Maggie and I had been sat back at the table for quite a while, not speaking much but there wasn’t a lot to speak about and I didn’t exactly feel like talking. When the Governor came bursting back into the cell, along with Merle and another one of his men. He walked towards us, the others behind him, as he looked us over. The Governor had glanced at me, sat in my bra, before turning his attention to Maggie. I noticed Merle had a slightly shocked expression on his face when seeing me, as if he weren’t expecting to see me like this. He held this look, looking to the Governor from behind him when he spoke to Maggie. Was he disgusted? Was he really feeling pity or compassion? 

“Did I say you could get dressed. Take it back off.” he said looking at Maggie.

“Haven’t you done enough. You’re sick.” She retorts.

“Off. Now. I won’t tell you again.” he coldly orders before she reluctantly complies, turning away so they can’t see her.

Maggie turned back around, back in the position she held earlier, covering her chest. “Martinez, grab that one.” the Governor instructed, gesturing to me and I was taken out the room, along with Maggie who was being dragged out by the Governor. We were stood outside our doors, close to another which had to be the door to Glenn’s. Merle opened the door and walked in as we were held outside. I heard him mutter ‘uh-uh’ as Glenn was doing something he shouldn’t before we were brought inside his cell. His eyes immediately saw Maggie in her half naked state and his face dropped into a form of hurt and anger. He was holding something as a weapon and brought it up as he stepped forward towards us.

“Drop it.” Merle ordered, pointing his gun at Maggie in threat, stopping Glenn who dropped whatever it was he was holding as a weapon. He looked at Maggie in worry even though he was beaten up pretty bad. His face had already bruised and swollen, covered in blood which trickled down his front. We were really in a shit storm right now. 

“We’re through with games. Now, one of you is going to give up your camp.” The Governor states, unholstering his gun now also aiming it at Maggie as he holds her. Martinez doing the same with me. None of us say a word, causing the Governor to cock his gun and drop his hold on Maggie, Merle still pointing his gun on here. In a fast couple steps, he stands in front of Glenn, pointing his gun at his head as Maggie suddenly breaks.

“Prison.” She cries, taking a step forward in worry.

“The one near Nunez?” Merle asks, putting his arm out to stop her from going any further forward to Glenn. Closing my eyes, I sigh, laying my head down that we just gave up our holdup to these people, but I didn’t blame Maggie in the slightest. She held on as long as she could in the face of threat against her partner. “That place is overrun.” Martinez points out. 

“We took it.” she whimpers, not taking her eyes off Glenn who still had the gun to his head.

“How many are you?” the Governor questions. “Ten. We have ten now.” She answers, tears rolling down her face.

“Ten people cleared that whole prison of biters, huh?” he said aloud, looking surprised and mildly impressed, looking between us three. He scoffed before lowering his gun away from Glenn, walking back to the door but he stops at Maggie’s side. He shushes her, as she lightly cries, stroking her cheek and she’s visibly uncomfortable at his touch causing even more anger in Glenn. Especially when he forces her into an embrace, kissing her head and holding her face, shooting Glenn an amused face. He really was a sick man.

He pushed Maggie towards Glenn, who wrapped herself around him in tears as the Governor left the room. Martinez let go of me, pushing me to the floor as he left, following the Governor outside. I looked up to see Merle looking at Glenn and Maggie before he turned to me. It seemed as if he almost had a sorry look on his face, like pity, again. I stared back him until he suddenly started taking his shirt off that he was wearing over a top underneath. He handed it to me, holding it out in front of me to take; I wasn’t sure if it was for Maggie or me, but I was in a slight state of disbelief at the gesture as I took it from him. I looked away from him once I had the shirt, rising to my feet as he then left the room too. I didn’t know what to believe with that man anymore. One minute he was an asshole, the next he wasn’t. I mean he’d been beating on Glenn not long ago and now he was giving us the shirt off his back. My head felt as if it was spinning. Did he want to be here or not? Did he want to hurt us or help us? 

As Maggie and Glenn held each other, I heard the three of them outside starting to discuss between each other. So, I leant up against the door to try and hear them better. Trying to hear anything that might be of use for something as I listened into the middle of their conversation.

“Ten people.” The Governor exclaimed.

“That’s deep in the red zone. There’s no way only ten-,” Martinez started rationalising before being interrupted. He must have been referring to the area the prison was in.

“So she’s lying? Because if she’s lying, that means a pretty sizeable force has moved into our backyard. But if she’s not, this group with your brother at its core has done something you told me couldn’t be done. They did it.” the Governor begins, clearly directing the end of it to Merle. “Your brother might be out there right now, searching for ‘em. Blood is blood, right? Makes me wonder where your loyalties lie.” He points out.

Merle doesn’t answer at first, seeming as if he might be hesitating for a minute. “Here.” he finally replies. 

Looking down at the shirt in my hand he’d given me, I question if what he just answered sounded genuine or not, but I quickly dismiss my thoughts remembering it was Merle. Shirt or not. He’d chosen to leave his brother twice before, then used finally looking for him as a cover story to kidnap us, why should now be any different.

“You two get a small group and scout this prison. I want to know exactly what we’re dealing with.” The governor orders. 

“Yeah, you got it.” Martinez replies as I hear their footsteps walk away from our rooms. I just hoped he was right. That Daryl and the others were looking for us, that they’d find us, because I wasn’t sure how we’d get out of here. Glenn was roughed up pretty bad and Maggie still looked a little in shock by the whole thing. It was only a matter of time before the Governor had no use for us any longer and simply decided to get rid of us.


	14. fourteen

Glenn and Maggie had helped my me get hands free from the tape and were now sat huddled together on the floor against the wall, one leant against the other in comfort. Glenn had given Maggie his shirt soon after we were left with him in this room, so when I was free from the tape I put Merle’s shirt on he’d given me. I scavenged around the room for any substantial we could use as weapons, but it was all junk. I slumped down against the wall near the other two in defeat.

“Maggie, did he-,” Glenn started asking but Maggie was quick to stop him. “No. No, he barely touched me.” she sharply replied before her eyes looked over at me. I shook my head slightly, not wanting her to talk about it out loud. Glenn didn’t need to know the details. 

“All this time running from walkers, and you forget what people do. Have always done.” She begins, both tears and anger in her eyes looking between both Glenn and me. She was right. The world had always been cruel. People had always been cruel. It was juts being exploited even more now. “Look at what they did to you.” She adds, looking to Glenn, not mentioning what happened in our room which I was grateful for. I didn’t want to have to think about it for another second.

“Doesn’t matter. As long as he didn’t-,” Glenn started up again and Maggie slyly looked over at me again and I pleaded her with my eyes not to say anything. “No. I promise.” She says before they hold each other in their arms.

I now stared ahead, trying to focus on anything but what was just mentioned, looking at the dead walker sprawled out on the floor. It took a moment, but it finally came to me the longer I looked at the body. Bones. If we could get a piece of its bones we could use it as a weapon. It’d be strong and sharp if we were able to fracture and break them.

I immediately sprung up, walking over to the dead walker. I stood over it, scanning over what would be the best bet to get bone. I decide to go for the arm. Grabbing it’s forearm and holding it’s body down with my foot, I start pulling the arm in hopes of breaking it off. As I start pulling the arm, the other two stand watching what I’m doing, probably wondering why. Straining, groaning and using all my strength I manage to break the arm off the walker. Holding the wrist, I lay it against the floor in a position so it would be easy to break. Bringing my foot down with force, I feel and hear a large snap in the arm. Glenn and Maggie were stood in front of me as I began tearing the skin back away from the bone that was now poking out the arm. Now came the hard bit. I was grunting at the force and strength I was having to use to try and break the bone with my hands, but it finally fractured and broke into two. I handed one to each of them before stomping down a few times on the upper arm for a piece of bone for myself. We had our weapons. Now it was just a waiting game.

We all stood to the left of the door as it swung open into the right if the room, meaning we could attack and get out easier. Standing against the wall we waited for whenever someone came back and eventually they did. Glenn insisted at being the first one to go out and I protested seeing as he was in pretty bad shape but he pressed on it, so I reluctantly allowed it. I was stood beside him, with Maggie behind me, all of us in a line ready to move as soon as the door opened.

When we heard movement outside and the creak of the door open, Glenn lunged forward pushing past one guy as he went for Merle. I quickly followed going after the guy he’d pushed past. Grabbing him by the chest and slamming him against the wall before pushing the sharp piece of bone into his throat. He was holding a machine gun and as I pulled the bone out, he suddenly started shooting off rounds, probably by accident, as he bled out slumping to the floor. Glenn had been fighting Merle best he could; I’d heard him get hit against the wall just before the shots went off. We’d all gone into a crouch at the shots but Maggie had then tried fending off Merle as he went to pick up his gun, knocking it out his hand. I quickly picked up the machine gun from the man I’d just killed, seeing Glenn was unconscious on the floor from the impact of being hit and then hitting the wall, before turning around to see Merle pinning Maggie down with his hand blade at her throat.

“Let her go!” I shout, cocking the gun aimed at Merle.

He looks around slightly before bringing the blade and his hand off of her. “Okay.” He says with a smile as he holds his hand and blade up. I don’t have time to even think why he’s smiling when I hear a gun cock behind me. I turn to see more of the Governor’s men arriving, no doubt at the sound of the gunshots. I was still holding the gun at Merle as I looked back at them.

“Give me the gun!” Merle exclaims, rising and snatching it from me before turning back to Maggie who had moved over to Glenn, trying to wake him. “Get up!” Merle shouts to them before pulling me back into the room. Maggie and Glenn soon following as he woke dazed. 

They lined us up in the middle of the room on our knees and even I had to admit I was panicking now. Glenn could barely stay on his knees while Maggie was crying. I grabbed her hand in the slightest effort of comfort, not that it probably did much in this situation. We all knew what was likely next, but I thought it wouldn’t let her feel alone.

“Glad we could catch up.” Merle mocks before moving behind us.

“Just keep looking at me.” Glenn whispers to Maggie, grabbing her hand also.

“I love you.” She cries, sniffling juts before they put a bag over her head, then Glenn’s and then mine.

I couldn’t see anything, not even a shred of light through the bag. Ripping my hand away from Maggie’s, they tied my hands together. They pulled us to our feet, ordering us to move as the dragged us out the room. We walked forward not being able to see where we were going but we must have only taken a few steps out of the room when suddenly a tin or metal clatter sounded in front of us, quickly followed by a small explosion by the sounds of it. It disorientated everyone and I could feel gas coming through the bag as we all began to cough from breathing it in. I pulled the bag off my head having felt the grip on me gone from whoever was taking me out the room. But through the gas and smoke, I couldn’t see a thing. That was until I felt someone pull me away and I resisted until I saw it was Rick. I didn’t even have a moment to feel relieved at seeing him and Daryl before he led me away, seeing Daryl do the same for Glenn and Oscar with Maggie, leading us out and away.

It wasn’t until we were outside, trying to find cover that I realised there was a woman with them I didn’t recognise but I didn’t have time to process. We had to get out of here. I was now helping Maggie with Glenn who now couldn’t walk on his own, supporting him at his side when Rick quietly directed us into a building as more people started coming out into the street. Rick and Daryl entered first, guns in hand as we brought Glenn inside, followed by the other two. He fell to the floor, taking us down with him and Maggie was quick to begin patching him up best she could.

“Ain’t no way out back there.” Daryl points out.

“Rick, how did you find us?” Maggie asks but he answers with another question. “How bad are you hurt?” he says, looking to all us three.

“Ah, we’ll be alright.” Glenn dismisses.

“Who’s this?” I ask, looking over at the woman, rising to a stand. “Michonne. She helped us find this place.” He quickly answers as he moves over to the window to peak outside. I’d never seen this woman in Woodbury the whole time I was here, so how did she know where to find it? And where did she appear from? I shake my thoughts away, remembering they were ones for later.

“We gotta get ‘em out of here.” Rick states, looking and pointing back at us, mostly referring to Glenn, who Maggie was wrapping a blanket around.

“Rick, I’m sorry. We told him where the prison was. We couldn’t hold out.” Glenn apologises.

“No. No need to apologise.” He assures him coming over, patting him on the leg while I moved towards the door. I peak out, seeing that I could slip out alone, undetected.

“They’re gonna be looking for us.” Maggie points out.

“The car’s a few miles out. We have to get ba-,” Rick says but is interrupted by Daryl. “Y/N, what’re you doing?” he questions me, seeing me opening the door to slip out.

“I’ll catch up with you guys. There’s something I gotta do.” I state.

“No, wait. Y/N, we can’t split u-,” Rick starts protesting but I leave regardless cutting him off.

As I shut the door, I hear Daryl inside. “The hell she thinks she’s doin’.” He exclaims sounding a little frustrated, but it doesn’t me and I creep away from the building, heading for the Governor’s apartment. He had my katana and I wasn’t leaving until I faced him in some way. I wanted to make him hurt in any way I could after what he did.

I remember my way to his place and find it disappointingly empty. Although, it made sense. He wouldn’t exactly be up here with everything that was happening outside. I looked over to his cabinet, remembering that was where he had stored my sword before and I was relieved to see he had, once again, kept it there. I took it out without hesitation, although, looking back down at it, it felt strange holding it after what had happened back in the room. But I dismissed the thought and strapped it to my back. I moved over to his table, pulling out a chair before sitting and facing the door. Unsheathing my katana, I hold it in my lap as I sit and wait for the Governor, figuring he’d come sooner or later.

Gunfire raged outside in the street, but I stayed in the apartment, waiting. I only moved when I started hearing thumping, a banging coming from behind a door. I look over and remember hearing the same thing before, back when I was in Woodbury the first time, but it had been locked. The noise continued as I rose and made my way over, kicking the door in one motion. Not caring this time about getting caught. I walk inside to see something utterly disturbing. There was a series of tanks, stacked on top of each, filled with heads. Dead, walker heads. Then I saw the one at the top and I suddenly recognised it was the man they’d saved from the helicopter wreckage. I knew the Governor had been hiding some kind of hidden agenda. I didn’t know what I expected it to be, but it wasn’t this. This man was disturbed.

The banging started up again, louder this time now I was inside the room, but it was still coming from behind another door. I moved towards it, sliding the lock slowly before opening the door suddenly, standing back from whatever was inside. But nothing jumps out. Instead, I see a small figure stumbling its way out. It was a child. She had her arms tied around her waist and a bag over her head. I was shocked at the sight. Why would he lock up a child, he truly was sick. I laid my sword down, crouching down to my knee.

“It’s okay.” I whisper, trying to comfort the girl as she stepped towards me, holding my arms out to help her. “I’m not gonna hurt you.” I assure the poor girl. “Come on, let’s leave.” I whisper as she comes into my grip, making sure to keep it gentle. I then notice she’s chained to something back in the cupboard and I rise to detach her from behind, before resuming my crouch in front of her. I peel the bag off her head to let her see when she suddenly starts growling and snarling at the sight of me. I immediately step backwards in disbelief. Realising now why she was locked away; she was a walker. Was this his daughter? Had he kept her all this time? Was this Penny? The girl stepped forward and I grabbed my sword before holding her away by her shoulder. I had to put her out of her misery. I turned her so she faced away from me and readied to put my sword through her skull when I was stopped.

“No!” the Governor screamed, bursting through his apartment, aiming his gun at me. It was definitely his daughter, judging from his reaction. I moved her in front of me, keeping my sword close to her.

“Don’t hurt her.” He softly pleads, raising his hands and gun. Did he think she was alive? She could feel? He was delusional. 

He holstered his gun and took off his weapons belt. “It’s me you want, huh?” he continues, placing the belt on the table as he slowly approached the doorway to the room I was holding his daughter in, his hands still up.

“There’s no need for her to suffer.” He adds.

“She doesn’t have needs.” I retort. 

“Don’t hurt my little girl.” He begged more desperately as he slowly came into the doorway. “Please.” He said softly, tears in his eyes but his emotions didn’t bother me in the slightest. I hated this man and wanted to do anything I could to him to make him suffer. I stared at him, angered, as I kept my hold on his walker daughter.

“I hope this hurts.” I calmly spit, repeating the words he said to me back in the room, hoping to make what I was about to do sting and resonate even more, before stabbing my sword through her head.

“No!” the Governor screamed as he lurched forward at us. 

I pulled my sword out the girl’s head but not quick enough for me to swing at him; he gets a grip on me and pins me to the wall causing me to drop my katana. He throws a punch to my face but I manage to firm my hold on him before he goes to hit me again, pushing him back. He falls back going over a chair, taking me with him, as we fall over it onto the floor. The fall lands me on top of him; I roll off of him, but he gets on top of me, straddling me to hold me down. His hands were around my throat, strangling me as he let out a pained scream. My hand was searching for my katana case that had come off my back and was laid somewhere around me. I got a grip on it and stroke him hard with it, sending him to the side off of me, rolling to the ground. I brought myself to a stand and quickly stepped over to him, kicking him down as he tried to get off all fours. I brought the case around in front of him and started strangling him with it but he gradually rises to a stand under the hold. Stepping backwards he us back against the wall, crushing me against it and breaking the case away from his neck and my hands. As he quickly turns to face me, I’m faster to send a blow to his stomach, punching him hard causing him to hunch over in pain. He’s quick to retaliate though, grabbing my face and smashing my head against the wall a couple times, wails of pain escaping me, but I manage to stop him by biting his thumb that got close to my mouth. Although, it doesn’t help me much as after his cry of pain, he pulls and drags me forward, sending me through into one of the walker head tanks, my own head breaking through the glass. The water from the tank drenched me and he held me there as I tried to push away, the heads in the tank laid there biting their teeth at me. I resist him and pull away from the tanks, my hands gripping the tanks on either side of me so as I fell backwards against his hold, I brought the tanks down with me. They smashed on the floor just as I hit also, the Governor quick to tower over me on the ground, grabbing a hold of me again. He got himself behind me, lowered to the ground too, gripping me in a chokehold but I manage to elbow him in the face. He relinquishes his hold on me, rolling to his side as I start to crawl across the floor towards my sword, coughing as I drag myself. He suddenly jumps on top of me, once again, getting his arm around my neck, choking me. I extend my arm out in front of me but my katana was juts out of reach. I look to the side and see that one of the smashed tanks had a large shard of glass still sticking out from the side of its frame. I reached out to grab it, just getting a hold of it before forcing it out, blood starting to drip out of my hand from the tight grip around it, when it snaps free. I then don’t hesitate to bring it up to his face and jam it straight into one of his eyes, hard. He screams out in pain, letting go of me as I snap the shard leaving the part that punctured his eye securely in there. As the Governor squirmed back away, in a fit of pained cries on the floor, I rise to my feet. Grabbing my katana and it’s case, I strap the case to my back and steady my grip on the sword as I bring it up over the Governor just as I hear another cry entering the room.

“No!” a woman screams. I rapidly spin on the spot, spinning around and pointing my sword at the woman approaching the doorway as she cocked her gun. It was Andrea. We look at each in disbelief as Andrea starts to lightly shake her head, visibly upset.

“What have you done?” she says softly as we start to slowly move around. Her gun still aimed at me and my katana pointed at her, we moved around in a circle. She got closer to the Governor as I got closer to the door. When I was in the doorway, Andrea’s cold expression staring at me, even with it and the gun, I still know she won’t pull the trigger. So, I lower my katana, staring, before I turn and walk out the room, leaving them both. She’d clearly made her choice. She’d chose this place and him completely.

Leaving Woodbury was surprisingly easy, even being a little roughed up. I could remember its weak spots from when I was last here and made a beeline for one once I was out on the street. As I made my way around the place, looking for any sign of the group, I eventually came across them ahead, hiding around the front side of the walls. Nearing them, Rick shot around at the sound of me approaching, cocking his gun in my direction. Seeing it was me, he quickly lowered it, but I could see he looked mildly pissed.

“Where were you? And what the hell happened to you?” he questioned, looking me over, seeing I was drenched and had blood trickling down my lower face, as well in my hand.

“Had a little chat with the Governor.” I coldly reply.

“We needed you back there. They’ve got Daryl.” He snaps.

“What?” I exclaim as quietly as I could, both worried and annoyed. “We- we gotta go back in after him. We gotta get him back.” I add panicked.

“Relax. We are. And we will. Whatever it takes.” Rick states, glaring back to the wall.

The plan seemed easy enough. A simple extraction. At least we hoped anyway. Rick, Maggie and I had made our way around the walls of Woodbury as Glenn and Michonne went back to the car. Rick not 100% yet on Michonne and Glenn was in no state to fight if needed be. They’d told me Oscar didn’t make it. He was shot down as they escaped. It was upsetting; it had actually grown to like him over the last few days. 

Coming into the town, it was eerily quiet and empty, it was strange, but we still kept cover. The place seemed like a ghost town, no one was in sight and considering we’d just attacked them, you’d think they’d be on high alert. As we made our way, under cover, through the street, we suddenly heard shouts and cheering coming from one place within the town. Rick motioned us forward towards the noise.

Making sure we weren’t seen, we came around the backs of buildings before coming up to the place where the noise was, finding a spot behind a skip that granted us cover in front of the place the whole town had gathered in from the looks of it. Peeking over, we saw what looked like some kind of gladiator fight ring or just some kind of fighting ring with the town shouting on seating stands at the two men in the middle fighting. One of them was Daryl, then I saw the other was Merle. They were fighting each other, with the Governor’s men were circled around them in the pit, holding walkers on poles in front of them. This must have been the reason they had kept walkers in cages, like the ones I found and killed. This place got worse and worse, the longer I spent here. Merle had Daryl pinned on the floor before suddenly he hoisted him to his feet and they were now back to back, punching and pushing walkers off that got too close. They’d begun fighting together.

Rick quietly whistled to get mine and Maggie’s attention. He was crouched at the corner of the skip, ready to begin the plan. He nodded at us both who were looking out above the skip, to commence firing. We brought our guns up, resting them on the skip and began firing. I shot a walker that got too close for my liking to Daryl first, then taking down the man that held it. The people of Woodbury started to scream and scatter at the sudden gunfire with Maggie joining in as well. Rick threw some smoke canisters out for cover, like they had before, before we all started shooting to take out the lights that shone onto this fighting pit. The smoke meant we couldn’t see Daryl, so we waited behind the skip, shining the torch in the direction of where they were. The people of Woodbury were running away, even past us to get out of the pit, not taking a second to look at us, when suddenly Daryl came running out the smoke with Merle behind him, following the direction of the people.

“Daryl!” I shout over to him and he spots us immediately, directing his run for us around the skip. 

“Let’s go. Come on.” Rick calls out as they reach us and we all move, taking off into a run to finally get out of this hell hole.


	15. fifteen

We’d had to make our way around Woodbury, coming to the front, to get away from all the people so we could attempt to escape for the last time, I hoped. Coming up along the walls, we scoped the area, holding our guns out for any sign of a single person approaching.

“They’re all at the arena. This way.” Merle called to us all, leading the way ahead to part of the wall.

“You’re not going anywhere with us.” Rick snaps.

“You really wanna do this now?” Merle spits back before pounding on a part of the wall to break it open. We stood around for cover, looking out to the street, guns poised until Merle broke through

“Rick, come on. We gotta go.” Daryl urges moving off behind, Maggie following. “Go.” Rick orders to me, covering as I went out the wall, Rick just behind. Coming out, we see Merle crouched over a walker, smashing it’s head in with his metal arm contraption.

“Little help would be nice!” he shouts over to us as more approached. We started taking them out, Daryl with his crossbow and us with the guns before Merle started shouting again.

“We ain’t got time for this!” he exclaims beginning to run off away from Woodbury.

“Let’s go.” Daryl orders over to us, hot on Merle’s trail. Maggie and me share a look with Rick, we were all not sure about Merle but we didn’t have time to debate it right now. Rick nods in their direction for us to follow as he ran behind us. 

It had broken into morning light, a sunrise, by the time we got to Glenn and Michonne at the car they’d drove out here. I was exhausted. The whole of yesterday had taken it out of me, plus the fighting in the night to then make our way here. All I wanted to do was rest and forget this sorry nightmare even happened. I didn’t even care that Merle was with us anymore.

“Glenn.” Rick calls out as we near the treeline coming onto the road where the other two were with the car.

“Rick? Rick. Oh, thank god.” Glenn called back, coming into the woods along with Michonne.

“Now, we got a problem here. I need you to backup.” Rick states to them both, holding his hand up as we got closer to each other.

“What the hell is he doing here?” Glenn exclaims as Michonne lunges forward to get at him and Glenn marches forward cocking his gun pointed at him, both infuriated at the sight of him. Rick and Maggie move towards them, Rick stopping Michonne from getting any further, repeatedly calling out ‘hey’ to draw their attention to him as he held her back and Maggie tried to calm Glenn. Daryl growing angry at the display, yelling for Glenn to lower his gun. I just stood behind them all, leant against the tree watching, too tired to do anything.

“He tried to kill me!” Michonne shouted. “If it wasn’t for him Maggie wouldn’t have been-,” Glenn begins to chime in but is cut off by Daryl.

“No, he helped us get out of there.” He states.

“Yeah, right after he beat the shit out of you.” Rick retorts.

“Hey, we both took our licks, man.” Merle mocks.

“Jackass.” Daryl chimes. “Hey, shut up.” Merle replies.

“Enough!” Rick shouts to Merle as the others start piping up again and everyone starts talking over each other. “Hey, get that thing out of my face.” Daryl yells enraged to Glenn still holding the gun at Merle who Daryl stood between, as well as Rick stopping Michonne.

Merle starts laughing. “Man. Look like you gone native, brother.” He teases.

“No more than you hangin’ out with that psycho back there.” Daryl retaliates, annoyed.

“Oh yeah, man. He is a charmer, I gotta tell you that.” Merle starts. “Been putting the wood to your girlfriend Andrea big time, baby. Oh yeah, she’s right next to the Governor now.” He announces, turning around to face me.

“Shut up, bro!” Daryl yells at him but he doesn’t budge.

“She made her choice.” I say low and cold, not moving from my spot before he turns back to face the others.

“So what you gonna do now, Sheriff, huh? Now you’ve rattled the monster back there.” He questions, clearly trying to get a rise out of him. “Shut up.” Rick snaps.

Merle chuckles. “Oh, man. Look at this. Pathetic. All these guns and no bullets in me.” he adds.

“Merle, you better shut up-,” Daryl irritated, starts saying before Merle explodes. “Shut up yourselves, bunch of pussies, you--,” he begins shouting before slumping to the ground unconscious at the impact of my foot. I’d roundhouse kicked him as he began running his mouth off, with the intention of shutting him up because telling him to do so, wasn’t going to cut it.

“Asshole.” I whispered looking down at him on the ground before looking back up to the others who stood in silence staring. I just looked to Daryl with a slight look of sorry on my face at knocking Merle unconscious but to be honest, I wasn’t. I just wanted to get back and we were getting no where just stood out here. Glenn turned and started walking back to the car with me following. I’d got him to shut up, they could get him in the car.

No one spoke in the car. I didn’t think anyone was up for it; no one was in the highest of moods, especially myself. They’d packed an unconscious Merle in the boot as we were sat in all the spaces, but he eventually came to as we neared the prison, running his mouth as soon as he woke in the boot, banging away. Once we were parked back in the prison, Carol and Carl having let us through the gate, Daryl opened the boot as Rick and Maggie held their guns to deter Merle from doing anything as he got out the car. The rest of us watched on as Rick taped Merle’s hand to his arm contraption, Daryl not looking overly pleased, when Hershel and Beth came outside to join. They looked confused as to who this man was we’d brought back, unlike Carl and Carol who were shocked, knowing exactly who he was. They’d never met him, but I figured they’d probably catch on sooner or later.

Maggie walked over to her father and sister, holstering her gun before embracing them as they reunited. “Take your sister inside.” Hershel instructed to Beth, who nodded just before approaching Rick and I, hugging Rick and kissing his cheek in thanks. She walked back over to Maggie and led her inside as Daryl began leading Merle inside. Carol and Carl looked at Rick, as in question. “Go on.” He said, assuring them it’d be fine. I take a step to follow but Hershel stops me.

“Y/N, you alright? You look as if you’ve been through hell.” he questions. I nod in reply as he uses his crutches to come closer to us both. “Something like that.” I add.

“I’ll take a look at you when we go in.” he tells me, touching my arm before turning to face Rick, holding his hand out for him to shake.

“You came through, like always.” Hershel thanked, as him and Rick shook hands. “So, this Woodbury. You said you had a bad feeling about it. Was your gut right?” he asks me. “It’s usually never wrong. Wasn’t this time either.” I answer.

“Sounds like we have a new problem on our hands.” he points out. “Yeah. You could say that.” I reply.

“He had Daryl and Merle pitted against each other. Crowd cheering for them to fight to the death. What kind of sick mind does that?” Rick explains.

“The kind this world creates.” Hershel answers.

“Nah. People like him were around before.” I retort.

There’s a pause as they look at me before Rick sees a look on Hershel’s face, that I notice too, like he was holding something back. “What’s wrong? The baby?” he questions, worry creeping in at the thought.

“No, the baby, she’s healthy. Eats like a horse, sleeps like a rock.” He assured Rick.

“So, what is it?” I ask.

“There’s a small group. Four of them. They’re in the prison.” Hershel began. “What?” Rick interjected, sounding both slightly irritated and worried. “Carl found them, helped them in the tombs. They’d come in through the breach at the back of the prison.” He explained.

“Where are they now?” I questioned.

“Locked in the common area of our cellblock. They seem like good people, Rick.” Hershel assured but Rick doesn’t respond. He just stares until he walks off inside the prison, clearly not impressed or liking what he’d just been told. Not that I blamed him, we’d brought Merle back with us and we had this new woman, Michonne, around, now we had four strangers inside the prison too. Everything seemed to be happening at once recently, one thing right after the other. I walked back inside behind Rick with Hershel, still on his crutches, keeping to his pace.

Coming into the cellblock, walking through the common area, Rick marches through towards the cells, not stopping as he barely looked at the new people sitting at the table, not even glancing at Merle and Michonne who was also left in here. Practically ignoring them, he walked through into the cellblock, Hershel and I behind him. The new people looked harmless enough and Merle seemed to have calmed; he was sat on the floor up against the wall. Although, he was sporting an irritated expression on his face in Rick’s direction. Walking into the cellblock, Carl locked the cell door behind us as we came in amongst everyone. Daryl walked up towards Rick and I, Glenn and Maggie joining, clearly all wanting to know what was to be done with Merle and all the rest. They all met in the middle of the cellblock, with the others dotted around the edges of the space, when I suddenly notice Carol standing with Beth. I don’t hesitate walking over to her.

“Carol?” I say as I approach her, a smile on her face. I bring her into a hug, relieved to see she was alive. “What happened?” I ask before releasing her from our hug for her to answer. “T was bit. He saved me. I ended up shutting myself away. But Daryl found me, saved me too.” she explained. I smiled at her, glad to see her alive, hugging her again when I hear Rick start speaking to Daryl. Not waiting long to discuss Merle, getting straight to the point.

“Hey, Daryl, I know what you’re gonna say, but he can’t stay here. It won’t work.” Rick states as Carol and I break the hug looking over at them. 

“It’s gotta.” Daryl retorts as I start walking along the wall, getting closer to listen but staying by the wall so I wasn’t involved. I stopped opposite the few of them gathered in the middle, leaning against the wall with my arms crossed. “Having him here won’t work.” Rick explains.

“He’s here now ain’t he.” Daryl points out.

“Yeah, taped and locked up.” Glenn retorts.

“He’ll stir things up.” Rick adds.

“Look, the Governor’s probably on the way to the prison right now. Merle knows how he thinks, and we could use the muscle.” Daryl declares.

“We’re not keeping him here at the prison.” Maggie states as Glenn chimes in Simultaneously. “He held a gun to our heads.” 

“Do you really want him sleeping in the same cell block as Carol and Beth?” Glenn continued.

“He ain’t a rapist.” Daryl retaliates. 

“Well, his buddy is.” Glenn snaps, referring to the Governor, anger visibly appearing in his voice. Maggie stares at him, before I see her slyly look in my direction. I shake my head smally; I didn’t need what happened broadcast to the group and I really hoped Glenn stopped at that.

“Ain’t buddies no more. Not after last night.” Daryl replies.

“Well, he was there. And the Governor, he is a rapist.” Glenn spits, his anger rising. “Glenn-” Maggie starts, urging him not to talk about it.

“No, Maggie.” He dismisses, glancing at her before continuing. “You didn’t kill him.” He directs to Rick.

“Daryl was the priority.” Rick retorts.

“I should have been there with you.” Glenn adds.

“You were in no condition.” Rick declares.

“But my girlfriend was?” Glenn spits.

“Glenn, this isn’t about us.” Maggie chimes in.

“I should’ve been there.” Glenn exclaims.

“Hey, hey. You didn’t come back with us because you could barely walk.” Rick snaps.

“What about her?” Glenn questions irritated.

“What about me, Glenn? I’m standing right here.” Maggie raises.

“Do you know what he did to her?” Glenn starts over Maggie again, raising his voice and rage with every word. “Glenn!” Maggie then shouts at him, but he ignores her. I look down, not wanting to see their faces when Glenn inadvertently let out what happened. He seemed as if he was leading that way, not stopping.

“Your brother was working with a guy who made them strip their clothes. He stood by him even after he-” He continued, looking to Daryl. “Glenn, stop!” Maggie shouts over him, interrupting.

“He raped my girlfriend!” he shouts out to us all. “Leave it alone!” Maggie screamed as the words left Glenn. She looks over at me as I face back up at Glenn’s remark, and we share a small look of sad realisation that Glenn had it wrong.. He thought the Governor raped Maggie, not me. There was a moment of silence before she spoke up again.

“He didn’t, Glenn.” she, calmly now, reiterates.

He faces her. “I know you said he didn’t. I get you were probably trying to spare the thought of it from me. But I-I heard him, Maggie. I heard it.” he explained, sounding a little distressed.

Maggie held his arms, sighing as she looked down and I knew she was about to announce it, so I braced myself for the looks. “I promised you he didn’t. I didn’t lie. What you heard wasn’t to me.” she announced. I see the realisation in Glenn’s face as they both turn to face me, followed by the others. Shock and pity spread across all their faces and I noticed a slight anger in Daryl’s. Maggie mouthed ‘sorry’ and I nodded before pushing off the wall. I couldn’t take looking at everyone, nor being around them now it was all in the air. This was exactly what I didn’t want to happen, but I didn’t blame Maggie; she didn’t want to leave Glenn believing that about her.

As I started walking away, towards the cell door, Maggie called out to me. “Y/N, wait.”

I turned around to the group, when I got to the door, after her call. Directing my words to the few of them gathered in the middle. “Look, we’re not getting anywhere. I’m tired, and I’m sure you are all too. Let’s just rest on it a while.” I suggest and no one says or does anything. “Someone should stay on guard in the tower.” I announce, putting myself up for it without saying. It would be the only place I’d get to be alone. “Carl?” I call as he had the keys. He looks over to Rick, who nods his approval and he comes over with the keys, unlocking the cell doors for me to leave.


	16. sixteen

It’d been quiet all day. I’d been up in the guard tower all day and it had been uneventful. The only people I saw was the new people leaving the prison. Rick clearly hadn’t allowed them to stay, for whatever reason, but after the last several days I was sure I would’ve understood it.

It was sunset by the time someone came into the guard tower after me. I was stood outside, my arms leaning on the railing looking out at the sunset when I heard the hatch creak open back from inside. Coming into the top of the tower, I heard someone’s footsteps start their way towards me outside. I’d left the door open and they stopped in the doorway, not saying a word. Eventually turning my head around, I saw that it was Daryl. I turned back to face the sunset.

“You my relief?” I ask. 

“Mmhmm.” He mumbles as he comes to my side at the railing.

He looked out from the tower, same as me, both of us staring at the sunset and the colours it created in the sky. “Beautiful isn’t it.” I quietly point out.

“Seems like it’s just about the only pure thing in this world now.” I state. I see in the corner of my eye he moves his head to face me, but I don’t meet it. “Maybe.” He mutters.

“Rick kicked that group out.” He eventually announced. “I figured. Saw ‘em leave.” I reply.

“Freaked out on ‘em though. Started whisperin’ to himself all a sudden, lookin’ at somethin’ that weren’t there. Pulled his gun on ‘em, shouted at ‘em to get out. He’s not doing so hot.” He explains.

“Yeah. He’s probably still reeling from Lori. It’s going around.” I point out.

We stood in a moment of silence before Daryl mustered up to say something. “Maggie told us.” he declared breaking the silence. I sigh. “What happened with the Governor. What he did to ya.” He continued before hesitating on his next words. “I’m not gonna ask if you’re alright. I know you’re not. I get it was an impossible choice. But- why’d you do it. Why’d you put yourself forward like that?” he questioned softly.

“Because I couldn’t watch it happen to her. She shouldn’t have had to live with it. And, now- in this world, and being with Glenn- it would have broken her, as well as him.” I explain, still looking out.

“And are ya?” he asks. I finally look at him, but with a slight puzzled expression at his question. “Broken.” He clarifies.

I shake my head. “I lived through that kind of thing over and over. I knew I could do it again. Better to be me than Maggie. It was hard, and I’m trying to forget, but I’m fine, really. I promise. I just needed some time.” I assured him. 

“Ya shouldn’t have had to. But, I’m just glad ya alright.” He answered.

He paused before speaking again. “Was Merle there? Did he have anythin’ to do with it?” he asked, sounding a little broken himself.

“No. I don’t think so. It was just the Governor in there when it happened. When he came in later with him, he looked a little disturbed at the sight of me, and when the Governor told Maggie to take her clothes back off.” I assured him. “Gave me his shirt to cover myself, too.” I told him, fiddling with the hem of it. “It doesn’t excuse what he did though, Daryl.” I declare considerately. 

“I know.” He replies, looking down, probably unsure of what to think or do with his brother right now. “It’s a start though. A tiny one, but- one all the same.” I say, trying to ease him. Merle wasn’t the one I was angry at, at this point. It was the Governor. “It’ll just take time for us all to see him in a different light. If he stops being such an ass all the time, that is.” I add. “Yeah, that’s Merle for ya. Only thing he’s good at.” Daryl replies.

“There was a time I believed there was more to him. Back in Atlanta, on that rooftop. That he was more than just the ass he appeared to be. I’m not sure why, after everything that’s happened, but there’s still a part of me that believes that.” I announce, both of us still looking out when I feel Daryl’s hand entwine with mine on the railing. I was glad to have the time alone up here all day but I felt even better now to have Daryl next to me again. I rested my head on his shoulder, watching as the last bit of sun disappeared and the colours started to dim. It was peaceful and I savoured it, seeing as we had less and less of those moments these days and given just the past several days, I needed it.

We held that position for a short while, neither of us speaking, just enjoying each other’s company until Daryl spoke up when the colours disappeared and the night started to take over.

“Ya should go inside. Get some rest.” he instructed.

“I don’t want to go back inside yet. I just want to be with you for a while longer.” I reply.

“Least go inside the tower and rest.” he asks. “Only if you do too. Nothing’s going on out there. Been nothing all day.” I declare. 

He looks down at me still resting on his shoulder before he finally nods. I bring my head up and lead him inside the top of the guard tower to where the bunk mattress was laid that was brought up for whoever was on watch. I laid down as Daryl took off his angel winged jacket before laying down next to me. I nuzzled into him, wanting to be as close to him as I could, as he brought his arm around me. We laid there together and I thought how I lucky was to have him. I adored this man and he truly had no idea how much; I’d never told him.

“Daryl, you have no idea how much you mean to me. I feel safe with you, I feel like- me around you. You’re the only person I’ve ever loved this way. And the only person I want to.” I confess, looking up to him.

“Same here. Ya mine, Y/N.” He simply answers, staring into my eyes. He’d always been a man of few words, but he didn’t have to say much for me to know he felt the same. I didn’t hesitate to bring my lips to his, revelling in the comfortable feeling of him pressed against me. The kiss turned deep but it stayed gentle and slow, sending welcome shivers down me. He’d brought his hand up to my face, caressing my cheek until brushing it into my hair. I had my hand splayed on his chest over his shirt and I suddenly craved to feel his skin. I wanted to have his touch and feel only him, erasing anything phantom touches and feelings I still had and just because I simply wanted him, so I stroked it around his waist bringing it to his lower back. I hooked my hand under the hem of his shirt, gently pulling it up his back in an effort to start taking it off him. I didn’t get far before his hand came over mine, stopping me from pulling it up any further as we broke the kisses.

“Ya sure? After yesterday?” he softly asked. “I couldn’t be more sure. I only want to feel you.” I tenderly answered.

He hesitated a second before his next words came out, our lips coming closer together but not quite touching again. “I don’t wanna hurt ya.” He said delicately. “You could never.” I whispered back, stroking his face before we resumed our kiss. 

He allowed me to lift his shirt up this time, leaning us up so he could unbutton it but didn’t finish, just pulling it over his head instead, discarding it to the side. When his eyes met back with mine, after losing the contact when he took his shirt off, he held the back of my neck bringing me back into the kiss. He ran his hands over my body, every single touch so gentle and delicate, like I’d break if he were slightest bit firm with me. I then removed the shirt Merle had given me, throwing it to the side before pushing Daryl back down to the mattress. I brought my leg over him, moving onto his lap, straddling him as I looked down at his body. I saw the scars he had on his stomach and traced them with my fingers, like he had done to mine before. I hadn’t seen his, not properly. I got a glimpse back at the farm after he’d been injured looking for Sophia, but it was only a second and they were on his back. Here we were. Two damaged people together, but he was right he had said to me once. They did make us stronger and we were stronger together. 

He leant up, his body coming up to mine as he brought me back into a kiss. His hands were on my neck again and in my hair when he eventually stopped, staring into my eyes before moving his to my scarred stomach. Holding my back and tilting me slightly back in his lap, he brought his face to my many scars, starting to kiss along my belly, his lips touching every one of them. I closed my eyes at the sensation. Any touch from him sent a wave of pleasure through me. I lifted his face back up to me, wanting to taste his lips again. His hands slowly moved up my back, coming to my bra; he unclipped it and without either of us breaking the kiss, he caressed my shoulders to then slip the straps down my arms. I pulled the bra off my arms before bringing them back around his neck as he leant me down, pressed over me still in the kiss. We stayed like that for a moment until I began to undo his trousers in between us before he started kissing my neck, moving down my body with his lips following his hands. When he reached my waist, he started unbuttoning my jeans, carefully then pulling them to my ankles before removing my boots, and my jeans following. I was laid before him and I could see his eyes scanning over me. They looked blown wide as he came back down to me, pressing his body on mine, kissing him as I helped him move his trousers down. 

I was in complete bliss. Every touch, every kiss, every movement was pure pleasure. It was perfect. He was perfect. I never wanted it to end or let him go. And I didn’t intend to, ever.


	17. seventeen

I’d woken up feeling the best I had in a long while, despite the past week’s events. Daryl had the best effect on me. I’d found my person and I couldn’t have been more grateful or happy. 

We’d both come back into the prison from the guard tower that morning, coming into the common area with Daryl’s arm around my shoulder, to find not many people in there. Merle and Michonne were still hauled up in here. She was sat with Hershel and Carl, eating breakfast whilst Merle stood leant against the wall near the cell door, watching us enter the room and he appeared to have a slight smirk on his face, what for I had no idea. I started to wonder where Rick was; I thought after what Daryl had said last night about him freaking out I’d go check on him. I was about to start in the direction of the cellblock when Hershel called.

“Y/N, you didn’t give me a chance to look at you yesterday. But you look better this morning. Are you feeling better?” he questioned.

I nodded. “Much.” I simply answered, shooting a small smile over at Daryl who’d started getting himself some food. He shot a slight smile right back before I headed through into the cellblock after Rick, hoping to catch him in his cell.

Having gone up and not found him in his cell, I decided to quickly get changed in mine before coming back down to ask Hershel and Carl where he was, figuring they’d probably know. Coming back towards the cell door, I stopped just before it when I began to hear Daryl talking to Merle, stood with him where he was by the cell door against the wall on the other side. I moved to the side, to listen, as I hear the mention of my name, wondering what it was they were talking about.

“What he did to Y/N. How could ya stand with a man that does that? He questioned Merle.

“I didn’t know, Daryl. I’ll admit I suspected when I came back in that room with him. The fight in her eyes had gone a little. I started to question him, and- well, I’m here ain’t I.” he began. “What he did was wrong, I know that little brother. But, she’s strong. Strongest woman I’ve ever met, that one. She’ll survive.” He added.

“Mmhmm.” Daryl mumbled his familiar response. “She’s a tough son of a bitch, alright.” He agreed.

“And that’s why ya like her, right? Cause she’s a fighter.” He points out. I don’t hear Daryl respond.

“Yeah, that’s right, Darylina. I saw ya both coming in this mornin’, and I can see a twinkle in ya eye for that one. Same one I saw in hers at the mention of ya when she first got to Woodbury. I know ya, little brother, and I knew the moment ya both walked in this mornin’ somethin’d gone down.” he explained. “So, tell me. She a fighter in the sack too?” he joked. “Shut up.” Daryl chimed as Merle chuckled to himself. Only merle would have noticed that but he was his brother I supposed.

“Hey, I’m not poking fun at ya, bro. I like that one. She’s ‘bout the only one I actually like round here ‘cept you. Only one who seems to give me the benefit of the doubt. That’s a good woman, ya got there. Best hold on to that one, Darylina.” He tells him.

“Intend to.” Daryl simply replied. “And stop calling me that, jackass.” He added. I felt bad listening in but I smiled resting against the wall at their words.

“Ya know, Y/N might tolerate having me around. Might be fine with me ‘ere. But your group. They’re never gonna accept me, little brother.” Merle points out, the topic turning serious, suddenly coming back down to our harsh reality.

“They just need time, they’ll come around.” Daryl assures him. I wasn’t so convinced though; Glenn and Rick did not like having him here at all. I think he was holding onto hope that was most likely not there and I felt bad for Daryl. Merle was an ass, we all knew that, even Daryl, but he was his brother. His real brother.

“If ya think that, baby brother, you’re gonna be real disappointed. We should just leave, now. Before, they make us.” Merle suggested.

“Nah. We ain’t leavin. They wouldn’t do that.” Daryl dismissed.

“We can bring girly with us. Just us three. We’d make it out there, just fine.” Merle persisted and it went quiet. Daryl hadn’t responded. I hoped Daryl wasn’t considering it; letting what Merle said get into his head. We could all live together, it would just take time like Daryl said. I’d listened in enough, coming away from the wall I walked back into the common area, not looking at Daryl or Merle, not wanting to. Instead, walking over to the table where Hershel sat with just Michonne. 

I perched myself at the table, both of them turning to look at me as I did. “What you both talking about?” I ask, wanting to move on from what I heard.

“Michonne here was just telling me how she came to be in Woodbury.” Hershel answered, looking back over to her. “How did you?” I question.

“Got picked up by the Governor and his men when they found me injured, and they brought me back to Woodbury. Patched me up; stayed a few days but I started to feel something off about the place. I went snooping and found things they didn’t want found.” She explained briefly. “Like walkers and heads.” I pointed out and she nodded. “And a girl.” She added. 

“Penny, his daughter?” I questioned.

“You know about Penny?” she asked.

“You could say that.” I answer.

“Well, I threatened to tell the town about what I’d found and he went crazy. They locked me up and I’d been stuck there, for however long, until a few days ago when I escaped and got out. They sent Merle and a few guys after me, who I managed to kill except Merle. He shot me in the leg and followed me, that’s when we both came across you guys. I heard you mention the direction of the prison, that it was a straight shot. Then Merle took you guys. I grabbed the basket you’d filled that was left and made my way here.” she continued explaining.

“How long were you held prisoner?” Hershel asked.

“Not sure, could have been weeks, could have been months. I lost my sense of time in there.” She replied. There was a pause before she spoke again.

“I’m sorry for what he did to you. It’s despicable.” She declared. 

I wasn’t really sure what to say. I’d hoped no one would mention it again, even if it was in sympathies. “Well, you were locked up there a lot longer than us. I can’t imagine what that must have been like, or what he did.” I respond, as I hear Beth enter the room singing to the baby, with others around her.

“Yeah, it was shitty. But he never did that.” She says.

“There’s a moment of silence as we look at one another. “I killed his daughter. I killed Penny. I found her, chained in that room. I was about to let her go when I saw she was a walker. I killed her right in front of him.” I suddenly state, thinking she’d feel better knowing I hurt him in some way.

“Good.” she simply answered.

I rose from the table, reaching my limit of talking and listening about the Governor. I looked around to see Beth quietly singing to the baby still, feeding her, so I walked over to see how the little thing was doing. As I approached, her singing stopped as she looked up at me, changing into a smile.

“Hey.” She greeted.

“Hey. How’s little ass-kicker then?” I asked with a chuckle, looking down at the baby girl in her arms.

“Just fine.” She chirped, still wearing her smile. “And it’s Judith. Carl named her Judith.” She added.

“He did, huh.” I smiled with her. “Judith.” I whispered to myself, looking down at her, as Beth carried on feeding her.

“You’re good with her, you know. You got a knack for it.” I tell her.

“Just trying to do my part.” She humbly replied.

“Sophia used to wake me and my adoptive parents up. 3:00AM, like clockwork.” I informed, thinking back at the memory.

“I always wanted a child.” She chimed, not having lost her smile yet.

“She wouldn’t have made it, you know, if you and Daryl hadn’t had been here. I don’t think any of us could stand to lose anyone else.” She stated. 

I nodded. “Yeah. I know.” I replied, hoping all this we’d found ourselves in wouldn’t lead to losing more people.

“Hey, um, after what you went through- with the Governor- I’m glad you’re back. You make us stronger.” She announced. 

“Thanks, Beth.” I say as Rick suddenly came into the common room entering from the halls, causing everyone, who was now in the room, to look to him in alert. Waiting for what was going to be happening with Merle, no doubt. Beth immediately walked up towards him.

“Hey, Rick. Um- after what happened. Do you think the Governor will retaliate?” Beth called out to him all of a sudden, causing him to stop in the middle of the room.

“Yes.” Maggie answered for him quickly. “Let him try.” Glenn chimes.

“It sounds like he’s got a whole town. We’re outnumbered and outgunned.” Carol declares.

“We could have used some reinforcements.” Hershel states, looking to Rick. Making his thoughts on making the new people leave clear.

“We still do. Still can.” I add, turning their attention to Merle. 

Rick looks as if he’s processing everything we’re all saying, looking to Merle before turning back to us. He nods to the cellblock, walking through into it wanting us to follow. All of us came through, except for Michonne and Merle, with Carl closing and locking the cell door behind him. Coming together, the discussion on Merle starts, with Rick getting straight to the point. Keeping his voice low and calm so Merle and Michonne couldn’t hear as they stood at the cell door watching.

“Look, there’s no way Merle’s going to live here without putting everyone at each other’s throats.” Rick starts, directing it at Daryl, knowing he’d be the only one fighting for him.

“So you’re going to cut Merle loose and let that woman stay here with us?” Daryl questions annoyed.

“I haven’t decided on what to do with her yet.” He announces.

“She did bring you guys to us; helped us. It’s more than we can say for Merle.” Glenn chimes in.

“We don’t know who she is. But Merle. Merle’s blood.” Daryl states.

“No. Merle is your blood. My blood, my family is standing right here in this part of the cellblock.” Glenn retorts.

“And you’re part of that family.” Rick says. “And he’s not. He’s not.” Glancing quickly over to Merle.

Daryl pauses for a moment, looking across Rick and Glenn. “Fine. We’ll fend for ourselves.” He eventually announces. My stomach drops a little at the remark. He couldn’t leave; it looked like Merle had got into his head.

“That’s not what I was saying.” Glenn assures. “No him, no me.” he reiterates.

“Daryl, you don’t have to do that.” I state, hoping the others will come around.

“Shouldn’t we at least try. Maybe not for Merle- but for Daryl.” I suggest at the group, breaking the silence, wanting nothing but the group to let them stay so Daryl will. “Merle’s an asshole. No denying it. But Daryl’s done a lot for us. We should at least try; it’s his brother.” I argue.

There’s just silence as everyone looks around at each other, not saying a word but answering all the same.

Daryl scoffs, visibly annoyed. “It was always Merle and I before this.” He says. 

“Daryl, don’t.” Maggie pleads simultaneously as Glenn. “You serious?” he asks.

“You’re just going to leave like that?” Glenn continues.

“You’d do the same thing.” Daryl points out. “It’s either both of us, or neither one of us.” he finishes as he turns around, walking towards the cell door. My hear starts to break a little seeing him so defeated and start walking off.

“There’s gotta be another way.” Rick calls out.

“Don’t ask me to leave him. I already did that once.” Daryl says before continuing to the cell door. We walk after him as he unlocks the cell door with his set of keys, opening it and walking with Merle, who had a smile on his face, through the common area with us behind him. He grabs his crossbow off the table as they approach the next cell door.

“We started something last night. You realise that?” Rick points out, standing in front of the others with me, as Daryl and Merle stop before the steps coming to the other cell door that left the whole cellblock.

They both turn to us all. “Like I said. No him, no me. That’s all I can say.” Daryl repeats. I look around and still, no one says anything. Panic starts to rise in me.

Daryl starts walking back over to us, stopping in front of Rick and I. “You take care of yourself. Take care of lil’ ass-kicker. Carl. He’s one tough kid.” he states, with Rick sadly nodding.

Daryl turned to me and I felt the tears forming. I started slightly shaking my head, not wanting him to go. He puts his hands on my shoulders, before bringing one round to the back of my neck and he rests his forehead against mine. We hold for what feels like a second, before he lets go and turns back to Merle. Silent tears start falling down my cheek.

“Hey, girly. You’re the only person who gives me credit around here. Why don’t ya join us. We’d make a good team out there, just the three of us.” Merle announces as Daryl comes back up to him, looking back over to me.

I stare for a second before marching over to them, but I ignore Merle, staring straight at Daryl. “You can’t do that. You can’t just make somebody care and then just walk away.” I emotionally declare and I can see something stirring in him, like he was torn between Merle and I. “You can’t go. Not after everything.” I plead.

He stares back at me, looking just as broken as me. “You coming?” he speaks softly.

My heart drops at his two words. I sigh before looking back to the group. I was the one who now felt torn. These people were my family. But Daryl was too, more so in a way. However, I’d been through hell to find everyone, and to just up and leave them felt wrong, but then I didn’t want to have to watch Daryl walk away either. A man I loved versus the family I loved. It was an impossible choice.

“I can’t. And you shouldn’t either. I don’t want you to.” I quietly demand, before turning to the group. “We should stay together. All of us.” I announce to everyone, in a last effort for them to stay, for Daryl to stay. But nothing. They all still remain silent, not saying a word. I look back to Daryl defeated, feeling a little broken knowing I was ultimately going to see him leave.

He seems to mirror my look of defeat as I stare at his face, taking it all in as much as I could for as long as I could before he turned away. He placed his hand on my neck, once again.

“Ya take care of yourself, alright?” he whispers, staring into my tear filled eyes. He plants a kiss on my forehead, and I soak up the feeling, not knowing when or if I’d feel it again. As he pulls away, his hand moves to my shoulder to then stroke down my arm into my own hand. He steps backward and my hand goes with him as my arm extends in front of me, not ready for the loss of his touch, reluctant to let go. But he does. We stare at each other for a second before he turns around and walks out the cellblock, chucking his set of keys to the ground as they step into the halls. That was it. He was gone. My tears continued to fall but I stayed silent. I didn’t sob or cry out loud. I just stood there staring at the cell door, at nothing. Feeling empty.

Daryl leaving was quite a shock to us all. So, after, when the rest of the group ate their breakfast, all of us sat around the table and common room, it was dead silent. I sat at the table with my head resting in my hand, propped up by my elbow staring into nothing with Beth and Maggie sat either side of me. 

It had been a little while until someone finally spoke up. “So, what do we do now?” Glenn asked, sounding a little frustrated. “After all that effort, all the risk we took, Daryl just takes off with Merle.” he continues before anyone could answer, scoffing in annoyance when he finished.

“Well, he had his reasons.” Rick replies.

“Yeah. You keep telling yourself that, Rick. It doesn’t change the fact that we’re up to our necks in shit.” Glenn spits.

“What do you want me do? You want me to go out there after ‘em, beg him to come back? Throw down the welcome mat for Merle?” he snaps backs. “This is the hand we’ve been dealt!” He shouts.

“Stop!” I yell. “Just stop talking. There’s no point arguing about it now. He’s gone.” I point out, not even looking up to either of them, just looking down at the table.

“Yeah. She’s right. I’m done.” Glenn says, before walking off into the cellblock. I feel Maggie rub my back slightly before she gets up, following Glenn. Rick also marches off, out the cellblock with Carl and Hershel going after him. Carol looked to have befriended Axel and was walking into the cellblock with him, seemingly comforting him. Probably about Oscar. It was just me and Beth, who was still holding Judith, sat at the table now.

“That must have hard. I’m sorry.” She says, all of a sudden, reaching out to me as I sat in silence. “But, for what it’s worth- I’m glad you stayed. We need you. And even though you were gone for so long, we still look up to you. You’re a leader, like Rick.” She continues but I still don’t look at her or say anything in response. I wasn’t even sure if I believed her. If what she said was right.

“I don’t see why he had to leave. Merle sounded and seemed like a jerk.” She continues.

“Men like Merle get into your head. Make you feel like you deserve the abuse.” I reply.

“Even for Daryl?” she asks.

I shrug, still looking ahead. “Everyone’s different. Everyone has a different past. But if my mother and her husband walked through that door right now, and told me to go with them, I imagine I’d tell them to go to hell. And maybe some other choice words.” I explain.

“You would.” She states. 

“Doesn’t matter now.” I respond.

“We’re weak without him.” She declares. I finally face her, seeing her rock Judith against her chest and shoulder.

“We’ll get through this too.” I assure her, an effort to comfort her.

“I’m pissed at him for leaving.” She says.

“Don’t be. Daryl has his code. This world needs men like that.” I point out.

As Beth continues rocking Judith, she suddenly spits up on her. “Oh, shoot. Can you hold her a sec?” Beth asks, moving closer across the seat to me so I could grab her. 

I’m quite hesitant to. I hadn’t held Judith since I had to cut her out of Lori and that was the last thing I wanted to be reminded of at this moment. I lean back a little away from her, not wanting to hold Judith at all, shaking my head. “Beth, no.” I whisper.

“Please, I’m covered in throw up.” She pleads. “No.” I repeat sternly, raising my voice a little. We stare at each other for a second, Beth looking a little shocked at my reaction before looking down to her top, seemingly trying to figure out how she’d clean it. I sigh, looking down, before holding my hands out for me to take her.

She hands Judith over into my hands. “Thanks.” She mutters before leaving into the cellblock to clean herself.

I held Judith out in front of me in my hands, still not wanting to hold her even now, looking to my side so I didn’t have to look at her. But then, she started lightly crying and I could feel myself going that same way. I gradually turn my head to look at Judith, seeing her weak cries and one look at her and my tears start to form again. My chin begins to wobble as they trace down my cheeks, holding Judith in front of me. I can see Lori so clearly, but not just in the boiler room in her final moments, also at the farm, at the CDC, at the Atlanta camp. The times we were together, the memories we shared, and I felt sadness and guilt that she wasn’t here, holding Judith herself. Then it was all made worse when Judith stopped her cries and held her hand out to my face, touching my cheek. The movement and touch reminded me so much of Sophia. She had always reached out and touched my cheek as a baby when I had held her to stop her cries and it mine slip out. They were light and quiet cries as I brought Judith closer to me, adjusting my hold on her so I was supporting her head and body holding her close. I rested her head against my cheek as I sobbed, feeling everything at once. Losing Sophia, losing Lori, losing Daryl. Judith being my only lifeline in that moment, my only comfort, as I felt her stroke and play with my hair.


	18. eighteen

The group was in tatters. Rick was off in his own world, seeming to get closer and closer to borderline crazy, Glenn was in a constant rage, Maggie was still shaken from what happened in Woodbury and I just felt empty. But with everything going on, I had to pull out of my sadness, for the group. With Daryl gone and Rick wondering around aimlessly, we all had to step up.

After Glenn had stormed off this morning, we’d later on all come back together in the common area, trying to figure out what we’d do next. Hershel had pointed out that perhaps Rick should be here, and he was right, but it was just if Rick was up to it. I’d told him I’d go find him and try to get him back inside, but I already knew that I would most likely be coming back inside alone.

Walking outside, he wasn’t anywhere in the courtyard but then I saw him in the yard. He was running across it from one side to the other, towards the gates. I jogged up to the gate, opening it enough for me to squeeze through, continuing to jog down into the yard as I watched Rick through the fence walkway. Looking around, I couldn’t see anything that caused alert around the prison. There was nothing. I couldn’t even spot a walker, it had been quiet, the last couple days. What was he running for? He ran around towards the cut in the fence we kept sealed, untying it as I marched across the field to get a better look at what he was doing. He walked out and gradually approached the small wooden bridge that stretched over the creek that sat on that side of the prison. He stopped in the middle of it, standing there, doing nothing. Watching him, I saw that he brought his hand out in front of his face as if touching something that wasn’t actually there, when it moved to his own cheek. He was hallucinating. I was sure. He had with the phone and he still was now. Rick was in the deep end and it was going to be hard to pull him out of this. I knew it was no use even attempting to try to get him to come inside when he was like that, so I headed back without him. 

Coming back into the common area, Glenn was drawing out a basic floor plan of the prison on the floor with some chalk; Carl crouched opposite him as others stood around. Hershel looked to me in question about Rick as I came down the steps to join; I simply shook my head, silently telling him that he wasn’t in any state to lead. Glenn had looked to me as well, seeing me shake my head, he looked back down to floor and continued with what he was doing.

“Now you said you found Tyreese’s group here?” Glenn questioned Carl, pointing to a part of the floor plan. “Yeah.” He answered.

“We secured this.” Glenn pointed out. Carl sighed. “Well, he- he thought he came through here.” he replied, tracing the route with his hand.

“That means that there’s another breach.” Glenn states as he rubbed his head. “Okay. Now, the whole front of the prison is unsecure. If walkers just strolled in, then it’s gonna be cake for a group of armed men.” Glenn announces. 

“Why are we even so sure he’s going to attack? Maybe you scared him off.” Beth asks.

“He had fish tanks full of heads. Walkers and humans. Trophies. He’s coming.” I point out.

“We should hit him now.” Glenn declares. “What?” Beth questions.

“He won’t be expecting it. We’ll sneak back in and put a bullet in his head.” He explained.

“As much as I’d love to squeeze the trigger in between his eyes. We’re not assassins, Glenn.” I retort.

“You know where his apartment is. You and I could end this tonight.” He announced. I sigh, knowing it was a bad plan. “I’ll do it myself.” He continued.

“He didn’t know they were coming last time. And look what happened. Oscar died. Daryl was captured. And we were almost executed.” I counter.

“She’s right. It’s a bad idea.” Hershel backed.

Glenn turned, stepping towards Hershel. “You can’t stop me.” Glenn spat.

“Rick would never allow this.” Hershel says.

“You really think he’s in any position to make that choice?” Glenn questions.

“Think this through clearly. T-Dog lost his life here. Lori, too. The men that were here. It isn’t worth anymore killing. What are we waiting for? If he’s really on his way, we should be out of here by now.” Hershel explains.

“And go where?” Glenn asks annoyed.

“We lived on the road all winter.” Hershel answers.

“Back when you had two legs and we didn’t have a baby crying for walkers every four hours.” Glenn points out.

“We can’t stay here.” Hershel states.

“We can’t run.” Glenn snaps. Maggie suddenly walks out the room into the cellblock away from us all. 

“Alright. Look, we can’t go on the road. We’re worse off now than we were before. If we went on the road now, with Judith and less people, and the state some of us are in too. We’d probably not all make it far. But, like I said, we’re not assassins. And we don’t the ground well enough over there. We have a home advantage here; we should make a stand at the prison.” I declare. Hershel and Glenn look at each other, considering what I just proposed.

“Okay. We’ll stay put. We’re gonna defend this place. We’re making a stand.” Glenn announces, Hershel lightly nodding in confirmation.

Glenn crouches back down to the floor plan. “Carl, you and I will go down to the tombs. We need to figure out where the breach is.” He orders.

“You’ve got it.” Carl replies. “You’ll need some help.” I point out.

“No. In case anything happens, I need you up here.” he declares. I nod in answer to his plan. 

“Let’s gear up, Carl.” Glenn says as they both get up, readying to suit up for the tombs. 

I didn’t like not helping them out there, but staying wasn’t a bad idea, in case something did happen while they were in there. They both weren’t gone too long though, however, when they came panting back into the common area, walker blood all over their protective gear.

“Some we’re outside the boiler room. We’re overrun again.” Glenn announced as he walked through into the room, Beth unlocking and opening the cell door for them both.

“That whole section had been clear.” Beth points out.

“There’s a steady stream of walkers.” Carl says as Beth locks the cell door. This was not good, and the timing couldn’t have been worse.

“We’re wasting time. The Governor’s supposedly on the way, and we’re stuck in here with walkers.” Hershel states.

“Trapped between a rock and a hard place.” Carol adds.

“For the last time, running is not an option.” Glenn spits, his anger lingering.

“Glenn, if the tombs have filled up again, it may just be a matter of time before they push in here.” Carol points out.

“Or until some fence gives way.” Beth adds.

“What if one of them herds is passing through? We’re settled.” Axel chimes in.

“We can’t handle that with just a few of us.” Carol finishes. They all had a point, but I still thought that leaving was a bad idea.

“Okay. Alright. We- we just need to scout the far side of the prison. Find out what’s going on.” Glenn answers.

“You’re going out there?” I ask.

“I’ll take a car, make it quick.” He replies. 

“I’ll drive. And help.” I say.

“No. You stay here. Help with the fortifications. I’ll take Maggie.” Glenn retorts.

“You sure she’s up for that?” I question. Glenn doesn’t respond, instead just looks as if he knows she’s not, before turning and walking into the cellblock, to go see her. Hershel and I share a look as if we both knew Glenn was starting to lose control a little. He was letting his rage take over. I instructed everyone on what to do, giving them jobs on how to make some fortifications as best we could, with what we could. 

When everyone split to carry out their jobs, heading outside, Hershel approached me.

“We’re falling apart here. We need Rick back. Glenn needs bringing down. I know you’ve been through your own ordeal as of late but she seem to be standing strong in spite of it. We could all use some of that. So, if I handle Glenn, will you talk to Rick again.” He states.

“I didn’t exactly talk to him before. He was stood out there on that little plank bridge, looking at something- touching something in front of him, that wasn’t there.” I explain.

“You’ve known him since the start of all this. If anyone can talk to him, it’s you.” Hershel assures.

“You say that, but I don’t know if talking is gonna help him out of something like that. He may need to just come out of it on his own.” I point out.

“All we can do is try, Y/N.” Hershel says.

“Yeah, you’re right.” I reply, just before Glenn marches through past us headed outside on his own. We watch him stride past us and out the cell door. I sigh, looking back to Hershel, both following after him as I grabbed my rifle, strapping it to my other shoulder alongside my katana, while Hershel went up the few steps.

Coming into the courtyard, alongside Hershel, he shouts after Glenn walking over to one of the trucks, as we follow behind him.

“Glenn!” Hershel shouts after him again, causing him to stop as we still walk towards him. He turns around, looking at us both with a somewhat annoyed look on his face, before coming up in front of us.

“You’re not going back to Woodbury, are you?” I ask gently, hoping he wouldn’t be that stupid in his anger.

“No. Just going up there.” He answers calmly.

“I’ll go with you.” Hershel chimes.

“I got it.” he states before turning around to walk back to the truck.

“By yourself?” I say, stopping him. “How can you possibly think that’s a good idea?” Hershel questions as he turns back around to us.

“I can’t just sit on my hands.” Glenn retorts.

“You went on a simple formula run and got the crap beat out of you. Not to mention what happened in Y/N and Maggie’s cell.” Hershel points out while I just stand next to him, listening, in silence now at the mention of it.

“Are you saying this is my fault?” Glenn spits vexed. “No.” Hershel replies.

“I did what I could!” Glenn yells.

“We know you did.” I chime in, looking from Glenn to Hershel. “So does Maggie.” Hershel adds.

“She’s one of the two people most precious to me in this world. I’d trust you with her life. I still do. This rage is going to get you killed.” Hershel declares.

“With Daryl gone and Rick wandering crazy town, someone’s gotta step up. So that’s what I’m doing.” Glenn announces before heading to the truck.

“What are you proving?” Hershel calls out to him but he doesn’t respond, he just gets in the truck and drives off out the courtyard as Carl opens the gate for him into the yard.

We walk over to the fence, watching him drive out the prison after Axel opens the gate at the entrance. “We’re really scattered right now, aren’t we?” I point out after Glenn leaves our sight.

“Is that Rick?” Hershel questions. I look back to him and follow his eyeline. Rick was still outside the prison, wandering around where I’d seen him before. He’d been out there most of the day.

“I’ll go down.” I say. “Want me to come with you?” Hershel asks.

“Nah. You stay up here. Watch over the group while they fortify. I’ll be back up to help.” I instruct.

I walked over to the gate, opening it slightly again to slip through and closing it behind me. I decide to just stay within the prison yard seeing he was wandering around it and stride across it in Rick’s direction. I could see he was walking around the shrubbery near the wooden plank bridge. When I got to the fence, I called out to him to get his attention. I called his name three times, seeing him look around before emerging out the treeline to the bridge. He clocked me and began walking over it, towards the fences near where I was stood.

“I wouldn’t have come down here if it wasn’t important.” I announced as he stopped a little bit away from the first fence, looking a little dishevelled . “Are you coming back soon?” I ask but he just stands on the spot, looking down.

“Glenn’s on a warpath. Smart as he is, he can’t fill your boots. I’m afraid he’s reckless. We need you now more than ever.” I declare.

“Well, if you’re so worried about him, you lead.” he suggests, waving his hand at me as he said the last words.

I sigh, choosing to ignore his remark. “What are you doing out here? I question.

“-I’ve-- I’ve been-- I’ve got- stuff out here. Stuff.” He stutters, not making much sense as he looked around.

“How much longer do you need?” I ask.

“I don’t know. I don’t--.” He mutters, looking down.

“Is there anything I can help you with?” I question.

He looks back up at me, staring for a moment. I look back at him thinking that I wasn’t getting anywhere with him. He seemed like he was going to be a lost cause for a while. I turn to leave, taking one step.

“I saw something.” Rick states, stopping me and causing me to turn back to him. He approaches the first fence, standing before closer to me as I stood at the second.

“Lori. I saw Lor-. I’m seeing Lori.” He announced. He was still grieving. Understandably, with everything happening all at once it seemed, he didn’t get to process it very well or with time. 

“Um, look, I- I know it’s not really her. But there’s got to be a reason it’s-- it’s gotta mean something. You know.” He continues. 

“Was it her on the phone?” I ask.

“Yeah.” He nods. “Shane too. I saw him in the town.” He adds, looking down as if defeated by it.

“Do you seem ‘em now? I question.

He shakes his head. “Rick- you’re looking for ‘em.” I point out.

“Well, I’m waiting.” He declares. “For what?” I ask.

“I don’t know. Something. There’s an answer. I know it doesn’t make sense. Well it does-- it-- it can make sense. I mean, I- I- I think it kind of-- it will-- it’ll make sense.” He stumbles, not making much sense himself again.

“Rick. Come on in. You need rest. It’s not safe out here.” I say gently. He had his gun and a rifle strapped to his back; he would have been fine but not with how he was now. It wasn’t smart for him to be out here like this.

He looks around him, as if looking for someone, probably Lori by what he’d been saying. “I can’t. I can’t.” he almost whispers before walking off. I watched him start walking across the bridge and hoped that he wasn’t completely broken.

Suddenly a single shot echoes around the prison. I look back around but I can’t see if anyone was hit in the courtyard this far away in the yard. Taking my rifle off my back, I scan around quickly and spot a truck parked outside on the other side of prison. Gunfire abruptly began closer to us before I could see who it was; I lowered myself in response and see Rick running back over the bridge as bullets chased behind him. 

“Y/N, get down!” he screams as he ran before diving forward to the ground off the bridge, moving down, laying beside it for cover. I dropped to the ground and was laid flat in the long grass of the yard, rifle in hand. Rick was getting shot at while the courtyard started taking heavy gunfire. Looking over at the truck, I knew it was him. They were finally retaliating. It was the Governor.


	19. nineteen

“Man, there ain’t nothing out here but mosquitoes and ants.” Daryl declared as he stood leant against a tree facing away from Merle as he waited for him to finish taking a piss on a tree behind him.

“Patience, little brother. Sooner or later a squirrel’s bound to scurry across your path.” Merle assured.

“Even so, that ain’t much food.” Daryl points out.

“More than nothin’.” Merle retorts.

“Have better luck goin’ to one of them houses we passed back on the turn off.” Daryl says.

“Is that what your new friends taught ya?” Hm?” Merle questioned as he zipped his trousers. “How’d to loot for booty?” he added coming back up to his side.  
Daryl didn’t even look at him as stayed leant against the tree. “Man, we’ve been out here for hours. Why don’t we find a stream? Try our luck with some fish.” Daryl suggests.

“I think you’re just trying to lead me back to that road, man. Get me over to that prison.” Merle theorises. 

“We’ve got shelter. Food. A pot to piss in.” Daryl starts. “And the love of a good woman.” Merle interjects causing Daryl to glare at him at the mention of Y/N. “Might not be a bad idea.” He sternly finishes.

“For you, maybe. Ain’t gonna be no damn party for me.” Merle retorts as he looks for tracks.

“Everyone will get used to each other.” Daryl replies.

“They’re all dead. Makes no difference.” Merle announces unexpectedly.

“How can you be so sure?” Daryl questions, still not looking to his brother.

“Right about now, he’s probably hosting a housewarming party. Where he’s going to bury what’s left of your pals.” Merle answers. “Let’s hook some fish. C’mon.” He added as he began walking off. Daryl watched him before following after him.

Both of them tracked and scouted for water for a while, before coming close to a nearby creek. “Smells to me like the Swahatchee creek.” Merle announced as they both neared the creek.

“Well, we didn’t go west enough. There’s a river down there, it’s got to be the Yellowjacket.” Daryl points out.

“You have a stroke, boy? We ain’t never even come close to Yellowjacket.” Merle retorts.

“Well, we didn’t go west. Just a little bit south, that’s what I think.” Daryl reiterates.

“Know what I think? I may have lost my hand, but you lost your sense of direction." Merle states.

“Yeah. We’ll see.” Daryl says.

“What do you wanna bet?” Merle asks.

“I don’t want to bet nothin’. It’s just a body of water. Why’s everythin’ got to be a competition with you.” Daryl answers, slightly irritated.

“Oh, take it easy, little brother. Just trying to have a little fun here. No need to get your panties all in a bundle.” Merle replies when Daryl hears a noise in the distance, faint cries.

“You hear that?” he asks.

“Yeah. Wild animals, getting’ wild.” Merle says.

“No, it’s a baby.” Daryl corrects.

“Oh, come on. Why don’t you just piss in my ear and tell me it’s rainin’ too? That there’s the sound of a couple coons making love, sweet love. You know what I mean?” Merle retorts, circling his hips in joke as he laughs. Daryl brushes past him, heading forward toward the noise.

They both eventually emerge out of the woods coming to the creek’s edge, following the noise. People’s chatter and baby cries became clear, getting louder as they saw they were coming from a tall, concrete bridge, that went over the creek, ahead of them. A man was stood on the back of trucks trailer that was backed against the bridge edge. A couple gunshots went off as the people on the bridge were fighting off walkers.

“Hey! Jump!” Merle shouts, laughing to himself. Daryl looks at him disappointedly before pushing past him back into the treeline, headed for the bridge to help. “What? Hey, man. I ain’t wastin’ my bullets for a of couple strangers that ain’t never cooked me a meal or placed any of my pieces. That’s my policy. You’d be wise to adopt it, brother.” Merle announced as he walked to follow Daryl, who was now running for the bridge.

More gunshots echoed as Daryl got to the start of the bridge. He saw on the trailer of that truck that there were now two men stood on it, one of them with a walker grabbing hold of their ankle as the other tried to help him free. He aimed his crossbow coming onto the bridge, shooting his arrow into the walker’s skull that had the man’s ankle, sending it to the ground. The men looked around to see Daryl. He shot another walker down, the closest one approaching him in the cluster on of them that were on the bridge. Pulling the arrow out the walker, he turns and stabs it into another.

“Get off the truck man, I’m trying to help ya out. Cover me.” Daryl shouts to the two guys still on the back of the truck.

One of them jumps down, picking up their gun they’d dropped on the ground as Merle approached the chaos on the bridge, casually walking as he watched the others fight. The man started shooting at the walkers again as Daryl saw that in a car that walkers had surrounded, was the baby that was crying being held by it’s mother. He continued shooting the walkers, taking out the one’s around the car. Shooting a couple, he smashed another’s head in with the back of his crossbow against the window of the car as the woman was screaming inside. A walker had climbed into the open boot, getting to the back seats, trying to get at her causing her to scream before Daryl pulled it back out. He slammed the boot down on the walker’s head, smashing it. Coming back around the car, another walker approached him but picking up his crossbow he had no arrows left. 

“Daryl, I gotcha.” Merle shouted as he appeared ahead, aiming his gun. Daryl moved back around the car before Merle shot the walker down. “Go.” Merle yells as Daryl comes back around the car, picking up his arrows as he came back to stand with the other men and Merle. He was reloading his crossbow when one of the guys spoke a foreign language, saying something he didn’t understand. They appeared to be a Latino family, speaking Spanish. 

“Speak English.” Daryl says. The man says something in his language again before resuming to shoot the rest of the walkers. Daryl joining in to with his crossbow. The man with the gun was reloading as one came in front of him. Not being able to reload in time, with the walker now right in front of him, backing him towards the bridge’s edge, he punches it to send it back a couple steps. Merle watches from behind, not doing a single thing, leaning on the opposite side of the bridge. Daryl retrieves his arrows before sending them out again at the last couple remaining walkers. He looks over at the man still cornered by the walker punching it again, so he drops his crossbow and grabs his knife, unsheathing it from his belt. Striding over, he plunges it into the walker’s head, pulling it out just as quick, taking a couple steps back before kicking it back over the edge of the bridge into the creek below.

Watching it fall, both Daryl and the man look back up at each other, but Daryl doesn’t stay standing with him, walking over to pick up his crossbow as Merle came up to the car. He peeled a walker off the bonnet before opening one of the backdoors to the car. The man exclaimed in his foreign language, approaching Merle, who pulled his gun on him in response.

“Slow down, man.” Merle instructed as Daryl watched coming up along the other side of the car. “That ain’t no way to say thank you.” Merle states. The man speaks and Merle still holds his gun at him. “Let him go.” Daryl orders calmly.

“Eh. The least they could do is give us an enchilada or something, huh?” Merle mocks as he holstered his gun and Daryl walked around the car. Merle ducked into the back of the car, looking for anything of merit to take as the woman and baby continued to cry in the front. “Easy does it, Senorita. Everything’s gonna be fine.” Merle says as the younger guy, probably the man’s son, had come down off the truck and approached his father, saying something in Spanish at Merle. Daryl watched as the man held his arm out, gesturing for his son to stay put as Merle looted through their car. Seeing this, and the discontent and slight worry on the man’s face as they watched Merle, Daryl sighed before holding his crossbow at Merle from behind him.

“Get out of the car.” He ordered as he poked his back with the front of his crossbow.

“I know you’re not talking to me, brother.” Merle says, continuing to look through the car.

Daryl looked to the man and his son. “Get in your car and get the hell out of here. Go! Get in your car.” Daryl yelled and the man gestured for his son to go around and get in the car as he followed. Merle came out and rose up from the car, looking at Daryl as he held his crossbow at him still. He closed the door and stayed stood in front of him as the family reversed the car off the bridge and left. Merle brought his hand up to push the crossbow down, but Daryl lifted it up out of his reach before marching off back towards the way they came off the bridge, grabbing his backpack and arrows on the way.

Now back in the woods, Merle had caught up with Daryl. Both of them in a mood at one another as they strode through the woods. “What the shit ya doing, pointing that thing at me?” Merle questions.

“They were scared, man.” Daryl replies.

“They were rude, is what they were. Rude, and they owed us a token of gratitude.” Merle retorts.

“Naw, they didn’t owe us nothin’.” Daryl states.

“Yeah. Ya helped them people out of the goodness of your heart, even though ya might die doing it. Is that something your sheriff Rick taught ya? Or girly clawing her way into your heart?” Merle riled.

“There was a baby!” Daryl yelled, stopping to turn and face him.

“Oh, otherwise you woulda just left ‘em to the biters, then.” Merle retorts. They stare at each other.

“Man, I went back for ya. You weren’t there. You left. You chose to leave.” Daryl exclaims, bringing up the past that had been lingering over them since they reunited. “Y/N was even decent enough to stay back for ya, but I sure as hell don’t know why for your sorry ass. You don’t even deserve her forgiveness. Why she thinks there’s good in ya, I don’t know.” He continued, taking a breath.

“Y/N may have cut off your hand, but you did that. Way before they locked ya up on that roof. You know, you asked for it.” Daryl explains, his voice raised in anger.

“Heh, ya know- ya know what’s funny to me? Hm? You and girly. You and sheriff Rick. Like this now. Right?” Merle points out annoyed, holding up two of fingers crossed together. “Mm. I’ll bet you a penny and a fiddle of gold, huh, that you never told him or her, that we were planning on robbing that camp blind.” Merle guesses.

“It didn’t happen.” Daryl defends.

“Yeah. It didn’t. Cause I wasn’t there to help ya.” Merle retorts.

“What? Like when we were kids? Huh? Who left who then?” Daryl snapped, everything seeming to come out to surface.

“What? Huh? Is that why I lost my hand?” Merle shouts.

“Ya lost your hand because you’re a simple-minded piece of shit!” Daryl yells back as he turns on his feet to walk away. 

“Yeah? You don’t know!” Merle exclaims, grabbing at Daryl’s back, getting a grip on his shirt. Pulling him back it rips the back off instead as Daryl gets sent the ground. Merle’s expression changes from anger to a shock realisation when he sees Daryl’s scars across his back. Daryl coldly brushes Merle’s hand away and Merle lets go of his hold on Daryl’s now ripped shirt as he stands over him.

“I-- I didn’t know he was--,” Merle stuttered as Daryl tried covering his back to no avail, his shirt was truly torn at the back. 

“Yeah, he did. He did the same to you. That’s why you left first.” Daryl spits, strapping his backpack back on and collecting his arrows and crossbow before coming to a stand. 

“I had to, man. I woulda killed him, otherwise.” Merle defends as Daryl began walking off. “Where you goin’?” he calls out.

“Back where I belong. I shoulda never left Y/N for you.” Daryl exclaims looking back to him.

“I can’t go with ya. I- I tried to kill that woman. Damn near killed that Chinese kid.” Merle explains.

“He’s Korean.” Daryl snaps. “Whatever. Doesn’t matter, man. I just can’t go with ya.” Merle replies.

“Ya know, I may be the one walking away, but you’re the one that’s leaving. Again.” Daryl declares before continuing to walk away, headed back to the prison.

-

Rick was shooting at whoever was aiming for him from the treeline over near the truck, still being kept tucked behind the bridge. I kept myself low as I propped my elbows against the ground, holding the rifle and aiming for the Governor and his few men at the truck they’d parked on the other side of the prison. The grass wasn’t much cover against their bullets, but I began firing anyway, raining bullets on them as the group began to do the same in the courtyard. It was a battle of gunfire until eventually they stopped firing, causing everyone else to stop momentarily also when the sound of an approaching vehicle in the distance came into earshot.

Shortly after, a large van came speeding up to the prison and burst through the gates, destroying them as it charged through and into the middle of the yard. It stopped but with its engine still running. It just sat there. I stared at it, waiting for whatever was going to be happening next. I heard the fence rattle and looked over to see Rick had crawled over to the first fence and was now crouched by it, looking on at the van also. 

The back of the van suddenly creaked, falling open, with the end crashing to the ground with a thud turning into a slope from the van to ground. That’s when a large cluster of walkers begin to stumble their way out down the slope and into the yard. Shit. They were in between me and getting to the courtyard. I stayed low, in hopes the walkers wouldn’t see me and stagger around away from me as the driver came out the van, in all protective gear, and shot at the group to cover his escape back out the prison. Shots then sounded behind me at Rick again, landing around him at the fence which drew the walker’s attention over and a large group of them started towards my direction. The gunfire resumed, with the courtyard shooting back at the Governor and his men again, as Rick continued to take fire.

“Y/N! You gotta get the hell outta there!” Rick shouts.

“You don’t think I know that! As soon as I stand, I’ll be shot!” I shout back but I don’t hear a reply. The walkers were staggered but still approaching me and the gunfire continued. At least they were staggered, I wouldn’t have take them all on at once. I took a deep breath, knowing I was going to have to get up one way or another, before biting the bullet and quickly rising to a stand. I aimed and fired at the truck. Not stopping now I had a better stance and aim. I could see the Governor and a couple of his men crouch for cover as my bullets began hitting the side of their truck where they were uncovered from me and not the courtyard. I saw one of the men go down as the Governor and another got back in the truck. I was still shooting at them until my ammo run dry. I could hear Rick had started shooting his python at walkers, that had now gathered around the prison and him, drawn from all the gunfire as I faced the onslaughts that were now closer to me in the yard. I dropped the empty rifle and unsheathed my katana, ready to take down as many as I could.  
I strode forward, coming to the closest walker and took it out with ease with a simple swing to the head. Moving from one to the next, I sliced and swung and chopped down the walkers staggered around me, grunting from one to the other as my body brought down as many as I could. The Governor’s truck had left and the group had opened the gate from the courtyard to stand at the top of the yard, firing at the walkers now stretched across the whole yard. Even over the echoing gunfire I heard Rick exclaiming behind me outside the fence as he took down walkers without his bullets, having run out of them. The fence rattled and I had a moment before the closest walker would get to me to look back. When I turn, I see him pinned to the fence, holding off two walkers, yelling at the force when I then clock two men ahead of him. An arrow flies through one of the walkers as Daryl fires his crossbow and Merle yells as he runs toward the other with a metal rod. They came back. Daryl was back. He reloads as Merle sends the rod through the other walker holding Rick. All three of begin fighting off the rest if the walkers around them as I feel a grip on my shoulder and a snarl. In that moment of seeing Daryl again, I forgot about the walkers still approaching me until I felt that hand. I immediately moved forward, spinning and cutting it’s arms off that were stretched out at me before bringing the sword down on it’s head.

I resumed cutting my way through the walkers when Glenn drove back into the prison in the truck, driving up to the gate where the others were and stopping. I wasn’t sure how many I’d killed but it wasn’t enough. There was more filling into the yard through the now destroyed gates. More of them gathered around me and were becoming more clustered together, making it harder to take them on all at once. I heard the rev of the truck and saw it turning at the gate, headed in my direction. I persisted in taking down the walkers in front of me, swinging at their heads, arms and bodies, not stopping until the group that had formed in front of me where suddenly taken out by the front of the truck coming in from the side. I didn’t hesitate to open the door and climb in, seeing Glenn at the wheel still.

“Go.” I exclaim as I slam the door and he drives back towards the courtyard gate. “Thanks.” I pant. “This was the Governor, wasn’t it? I saw the truck speed past as I came back.” Glenn states. I nod in reply, breathing heavy, instead of using words.

As I got out the truck, now back in the courtyard, Hershel and Maggie were at the doors to meet us. Maggie made her way around to Glenn as Hershel stood before me. “You alright?” he asks. “Yeah. Fine.” I reply as we walk back over to the others at the gate.

We all looked on at the now overrun yard, filled with walkers. “Is that Daryl? And Merle? Stood over there with Rick?” Hershel asks and everyone looks to them over by the fence, looking in at the infested yard same as us.

“They came back.” Glenn says, sounding a little shocked. 

“They saved Rick. Merle included.” I state before turning and going to sit on one of the cabinets that laid in the rubble of the courtyard to the side of the gates.

The others watched as the three of them approached the gate. Opening it, Rick walked straight to Carl, crouching down to hug him as Glenn closed the gates behind them. I saw Daryl look over the group, as if searching for me when he looked to the side and saw me. I stared at him and I didn’t know whether to be relieved to see him or mad that he left in the first place, or both. I got up from my sit and strode towards him, both of us looking into the other eyes as I approached him. As I got in front of me, his mouth opened slightly to speak but his words never came out as my fist collided with his face, punching him. He stepped back from the force, his head jolting back before bringing it down and his hand to his face.

“The hell.” he exclaims as he drops his hand and looks back to me, Merle chuckling to the side. I guess I was mad. I didn’t plan on doing that when I stood up, it just happened. But as soon as I did it, the anger left and I was filled with relief to see him and hear his voice. Even if it were in irritation that I’d just hit him. 

We stared at each other. “Alright. Probably deserved it.” Daryl mutters.

“Damn right, Dixon.” I breath as I step forward, wrapping my arms around his neck, resting my head on his shoulder. He wrapped his arms around me as I did mine, to then hold my head against him. “Don’t ever do that to me again.” I whisper, still in his hold. “I won’t.” he answers.


	20. twenty

We’d all reconvened after the shootout, and the return of Daryl and Merle, back in the cellblock, all except Axel. He’d been shot dead. No doubt being that first, single shot that echoed at the start. The group was talking over what was next, with Merle being once again locked in the common area. Trust wasn’t going to come easy when it came to him. Rick and others had started conversing on our next steps as I cleaned my katana listening. 

“We’re not leaving.” Rick declares, cocking a rifle.

“We can’t stay here.” Hershel states.

“What if there’s another sniper? A wood pallet won’t stop one of those rounds.” Maggie bursts.

“We can’t even go outside.” Beth points out.

“Not in the daylight.” Carol adds.

“If Rick says we’re not running, we’re not running.” Glenn backs.

“No, better to live like rats.” Merle chimes in, standing by the cell door listening. 

“You got a better idea?” Rick questions.

“Yeah. We should’ve slid out of here already, live to fight another day. But we’ve lost that window, ain’t we? I’m sure he’s got scouts on every road out of this place by now.” he answers.

“We ain’t scared of that prick.” Daryl retorts.

“Y’all should be. That truck through the fence thing. That’s just him ringin’ the doorbell. We might have some thick walls to hide behind, but he’s got the guns and the numbers. And if he takes the high ground around this place, shoot. He could just starve us out if he wanted to.” Merle explains.

“Let’s put him in the other cellblock.” Maggie says.

“No. He’s got a point.” I back, discarding the rag having now finished cleaning my katana, putting it back in it’s case.

“This is all you. You started this.” Maggie exclaims at Merle.

“What’s the difference who’s fault it is? What do we do?” Beth chimes, questioning.

“I said we should leave. Now Axel’s dead. We can’t just sit here.” Hershel points out as Rick looks down to him sat on the bottom of the stairs, before beginning to walk off towards the common area to leave again.

Hershel brings himself to a stand. “Get back here!” he shouts. It takes us all by surprise. I’d never heard him shout so loud before and it stops Rick, but he doesn’t turn around. Hershel moves towards him on his crutches as we all watch.

“You’re slipping, Rick. We’ve all seen it. We understand why, but now is not the time. You once said this isn’t a democracy. Now you have to own up to that. I put my family’s life in your hands. So get your head clear and do something.” Hershel announces, with Rick having turned to face him in the middle of it.

They stared at each other, Rick not responding at all before lightly nodding and continuing to walk out. We all watched as he unlocked the cell door and pushed past Merle, heading outside. No one said anything but Carl eventually walked out after him. 

It wasn’t too long when Rick and Carl came back into the cellblock, instructing people on our next steps. Carl had clearly said something to get through to him. He was taking charge, finally.

“Take watch. Eyes open, head down.” He ordered, handing Maggie his keys.

“Fields filled with walkers. I didn’t see any snipers out there, but we’ll keep Maggie on watch.” He announces to the group.

“I could get up in the guard tower, take out half them walkers, give these guys a chance to fix the fence.” Daryl suggests. “Yeah, and with them all spaced out like that now, I could pick them off easy. Make my way around, clear the other half.” I add.

“Or we use some of the cars to put the bus in place.” Michonne points out, referring to the overturned prison bus that we’d moved out the way of the entrance when I arrived at the prison, when we first cleared up.

“We can’t access the field without burning through our bullets. And it’s too risky having you out there alone with just your sword against them all. Even with Daryl shooting.” Hershel states.

“So, we’re trapped in here? There’s barely any food or ammo.” Glenn announces.

“We’ve been here before. It’ll be alright.” Daryl assures.

“That’s when it was just us, before there was a snake in the nest.” Glenn says.  
Daryl glares at Glenn. “Man, we gonna go through this again? Look, Merle’s staying here. He’s with us now. Get used to it.” Daryl spits. “Hey-” Rick starts. “All y’all.” Daryl finishes, not waiting to let him speak before walking off and going up the stairs to his cell.

“Seriously, Rick, I don’t think Merle living here is really gonna fly.” Glenn spits quietly.

“I can’t kick him out.” Rick retorts.

“I wouldn’t ask you to live with Shane after he tried to kill you.” Glenn snaps.

“Merle has military experience. He may be erratic, but don’t underestimate his loyalty to his brother.” I point out.

“You mean the one he left in Atlanta.” Glenn chimes.

“He’s a different person to what he was in Atlanta. He may act the same, but he’s changed. And we can use him. We need every man we can get.” I counter.

“How you can say that after everything he’s done. In Atlanta, and Woodbury. He nearly killed us. How can you be okay with him here?” Glenn questions, annoyed.

“Because I love Daryl. And he’s his brother.” I snap, getting increasingly vexed at Glenn. He’d been a hothead for a while now and it was starting to get on my nerves. There was a moment of silence before Glenn spoke, again.

“What if we solve both problems at once? Deliver Merle to the Governor- a bargaining chip. Give him his traitor, maybe declare a truce.” Glenn suggests.

“We don’t exchange lives, Glenn. That’s not who we are.” Hershel declares.

“Well maybe it should be, if we wanna survive.” Glenn spits.

I roll my eyes somewhat at Glenn’s remark. “Glenn, give it a rest. Maybe you should step down from your rage before you fall.” I retort before walking off towards the common area away from them all. I loved Glenn, like he was my own brother, but he was starting to get under my skin.

I came into the common area and sat down at the table, taking a breath, with my elbows propped up on the table, holding my head in my hands.

“Well, hello girly. I woulda thought you’d be bumping uglies with Daryl already, now we’re back. Seems to be my baby brother doesn’t know how to take care of ya properly. Too bad he got to ya first. I still think me and you woulda had a mighty fine time together, girly. Now, if ya were mine, I’d be making sweet, sweet love to that pretty face of yours, right about now.” Merle joked from up ahead, chuckling a little to himself.

I scoffed at his joke, looking up at him as he sat himself at the other side of the table, a big smirk on his face. “You know that don’t work on me, Merle. I see right through your ‘flattery’.” I state, pausing at the word flattery, making it obvious that it was exactly not that.

“Oh, you do now, girly. Alright, you got me. So, am I to assume you came in here for a reason? Kick me round the head again? Punch me like you did Daryl? Ask for an apology, perhaps?” he questions.

“No.” I answer, and he looks a little surprised but not much. “I’d only want one of those if you truly meant it. And if I have to ask for it, you won’t.” I add.

“Mmm, smart.” Merle replies. We stare at each other for a moment, as I process my thoughts.

“Why’d you want me to come with you two? Back before when you both left.” I ask.

“Well, like I said before girly. You’ve given me more credit than any of ‘em. To me, you earned a place at the Dixon table, sweetheart.” Merle answered, a small smile creeping onto his face.

“For the record, Merle, I don’t need to earn my place with you. I helped you once, and you shoved it back in my face. I tried to help you a second time, trying to get you reunited with your brother, with me, and you flat out said no. Then used that as cover story so you get us talking, to only kidnap us. And- well- we both how that ended.” I state, glaring at him and for once Merle doesn’t say a word. “Now, how’s it go? Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me, right? I gonna try not to make that mistake again. Believe me when I say that.” I continue.

He laughs, almost seeming impressed. “Ya know, you’re one badass chick, girly. I respect ya. You’re skilled, smart, you’ve even knocked me on my ass. Which is more than what I can for Darylina.” He chuckles.

“I’m sure he’s got a plenty good, justified, licks in. And he is all that, and more.” I retort.

We both sit there for a moment before Merle turns serious. “Aren’t ya mad at me, girly? I mean like how your buddies Glenn and Maggie are with me. after everything’s that’s gone down?” he questions.

“Maybe. But it’s hardly worth it now though, is it. What’s done is done. And you’re not the one I wanna see dead.” I reply.

“I nearly killed ya. And ya friends. You don’t want to at least hurt me for some of it?” I just stare at him before he continues. “Ya keep helping me, humouring me. Why? He asks.

I sigh. “Because, maybe I’m naïve to think that even assholes like you need people now and then. Cause otherwise, you stay assholes. And I believe that you can be as good a man as any, if you truly wanted. Daryl’s your brother and he’s one of the greatest men I know, even if he doesn’t know it himself.” I explain.

“Wow. Ya know something, girly. I think you really got your hooks in him.” Merle teases. I scoff in response, seeing what I said probably went straight over Merle’s head. “Then again, maybe that’s a good thing. Girl like you, not a bad catch at all- you seem to be doing him good- leading him on a good path.” He continues, making me think perhaps what I said did resonate a little.

“I didn’t do anything. He did it himself. He’s come far from the man he was when I first met him in Atlanta. And you have to for that matter, albeit as small as it is. Although, I don’t want to get too ahead of myself, you definitely could still use leading onto a better path Merle.” I point out.

He snorts, but I wasn’t sure if it was in amusement or in disbelief. I wondered if anyone had ever talked to him this way before. “What? And you’re gonna be the one to do it, I suppose, girly? Ya gonna hold my hand and make me feel good or you saving that all for Darylina at bedtime?” Merle jokes, not being able to stay serious for long without poking a joke.

I roll my eyes, getting up from the table to leave. “If only you showed more of yourself to people, Merle, like you have with me. Your crude, obnoxious, and somewhat traitorous parts aside, they’d probably open up to having you here, and to you more.” I point out and he scoffs, dismissing what I said.

“You’ve got a chance in here. I have faith in you, Merle. Even if others don’t. Don’t let it go to waste.” I add, before turning and starting to walk back towards the cellblock. “You got it, girly.” Merle replies as I walk away.

Coming back into the cellblock, I headed up the stairs to seek Daryl after he’d stormed up into his cell before. As I came into the gateway of his cell, I saw him sat on his bunk, his legs stretched out in front of him as he leant against the frame of the bunk cleaning his arrows. 

He looked up at me, seeing me stood at his cell. “Glad I caught you in here. I haven’t had a moment alone with you yet.” I announce as I walk in and sit on a chair. He raised his eyebrows at me, almost with a look of anticipation. “To talk.” I add with a smile, figuring out his look as a small smirk shines on his face and it’s the first time I’ve seen him somewhat smile after being back. A welcome sight, as always.

“I’m glad you came back.” I say.

“To what? All this?” he questions looking around his cell.

“This is our home.” I reply.

He stares at me. “This is a tomb.” He retorts softly.

I sigh, looking down. “That’s what T-Dog called it. Maybe you’re both right.” I point out.

I look back up to him. “So what made you come back?” I ask.

“Well- leaving you. The group. It may be a tomb, but I should never have left.” He answers. “And Merle was being an ass.” he adds, earning a scoff of amusement from me.

There’s a pause, both of not speaking for a moment, as my thoughts wandered to Merle.

“He’s your brother, and there may be good in him, but he’s not quite there yet. He’s not good for you. Don’t let him bring you down. After all, look how far you’ve come.” I declare comfortingly. He looks down before looking back to me, still staring. He stares back until he scoffs, smiling at me. I smile back before moving over to sit on his bunk.

“May I?” I ask, gesturing to the space between his legs his arrows occupied, and he leant forward grabbing them, putting them to the floor. I lowered onto his bunk and laid in between his legs, nestling into his body as my head rested on his lap. He started stroking my head gently, stroking and playing with my hair. I closed my eyes to the feeling, revelling in the sensation. I loved my hair being played with and caressed, especially by Daryl’s hands.

“You keep that up, you'll send me sleep right here in your lap.” I point out.

“Ya mean, I found a way to shut ya up.” Daryl teases.

I elbow his leg, smiling, knowing full well he was smirking without even opening my eyes and I hear a chuckle come from him. “Nice one, redneck.” I mock, earning a pinch and jolt, squirming with a smile. I lean up on the bunk, out of his lap, and turn myself around to face him. I stare into his eyes before planting a kiss on his lips. I hovered in front of him before he held my cheeks and brought me in for another. It turned deep and quietly passionate, both of us melting into it. His hand caressed and stroked down my arm but I placed mine on top of his and broke the kiss. I knew if we didn’t stop, we’d probably get carried away.

I looked at him with a smile. “Perhaps screwing around in the middle of an open cell isn’t the wisest decision. Or did we learn nothing from the showers with Glenn.” I point out, leaning back from him as he leant back against the bunk frame with a low grunt. I chuckle slightly at him before getting off his bunk. I turn and lean forward, planting a kiss on his cheek before I left.

The day was starting to lose light outside, so I figured I’d ask if Carol needed help starting dinner, knowing she was probably already in the common room preparing something. I made my way down the stairs and towards the cell door and when I came into the doorway, I saw Merle was just perching himself on the table. He was looking down at Michonne in front of him, who was on the floor exercising.

“Smart to stay fit.” Merle says as I stay by the cell door entrance, leaning against it to listen. Michonne didn’t respond in anyway, she just continued as he talked. “Don’t leave out the cardio.” He adds.

“You know, if we’re gonna live under the same roof, we should clear the air.” Merle proposes and I’m a little surprised. Was this him making an effort?

“This whole hunting you down thing, that was just business. Carrying out orders.” Merle explains.

“Hm. Like the Gestapo.” Michonne chimes, not stopping her exercises.

“Yeah, exactly.” Merle replies. I scoff lightly, shaking my head a little at his reply, only the tiniest bit amused at his acceptance to the comparison.

“I done a lot of things I ain’t proud of, before and after.” He states. “Anyway, hope we can get past it. Let bygones be bygones.” He finishes before walking off out the common area. I wondered if I’d genuinely got through to this man. If he really now trying to make a go of fitting in here, with us all. It was a step. And if Merle tried, the others would see it and feel less inclined to kick him out on his ass which make Daryl happier. Which would make me happy. I knew there was some good in Merle, however deep it was buried.


	21. twenty one

The new day brought on a new surprise. It had been relatively quiet since the Governor drove off after his attack, but we kept on watch in the courtyard. A couple of us staying on watch at a time in the cover of the entrance gates surrounding one of the doors, lining it with the wood pallets, along with the upper walkway that stretched over the courtyard from one part of the prison to another. I was on watch that afternoon with Carl and it was still quiet, only except for the walkers that staggered around in the yard and the surrounding fences of the prison.

“Psst. There’s something weird out there.” Carl whispers from looking through his binoculars. He points in the direction and I poke my rifle through the wired fence to look through the scope at whatever he was seeing. I saw a walker stumbling out of the shrubbery from the woods but it looked as if someone was behind it, leading it forward. I couldn’t quite tell who it was until they came into view, moving slightly to the slide revealing themselves as they directed the walker in the direction of the broken gateway.

“It’s Andrea. Get your dad and the others.” I announce, whispering back.

Carl quickly left, heading back inside as I stayed watching her make her way into the prison yard. She had this walker attached to some sort of snare pole, using it as a deterrent from all the other walkers. Walking past the walkers that seemed curious, she held her walker more toward them to deter them away from her, but she swung a small axe in her other hand at one that got too close. 

Carl came back into the watch spot with me as the others burst out another door of the prison, coming into the courtyard, rifles in hand and Daryl with his crossbow. Glenn, Maggie, Carol and Beth appeared in the overhead walkway, rifles in hand also for another spot of fire if needed. Rick, Daryl, Michonne and Merle took cover behind one of the trucks, now parked in the middle of the courtyard in a diagonal line with the other vehicles, before Merle moved over behind one of the over vehicles.

“Clear.” He called back and the others began jogging over to the gate where Andrea approached.

“Are you alone?” Rick yells to her.

“Open the gate.” Andrea demands.

“Are you alone?” Ricked shouts louder, repeating himself as he stands against the fence covered by the guard tower.

“Rick!” she calls coming up to the gate, walkers now approaching her after hearing her. Rick threw the keys to Daryl who started unlocking the gate. Rick and Merle held their rifles up to Andrea as she stood at the gate.

“Open it.” Daryl calls and Merle pulls the gate open slightly for Andrea to slip in. She discards the walker on the pole and strides inside, the gate closing abruptly behind her. 

“Hands up!” Rick yells. I’d decided to come out of the watch spot and gradually made my way over watching as Rick then grabbed her, pulling her over up against the fence. “Turn around! Turn around now!” he continues as he pushed her.

As Daryl locked the gate back up, the others held their rifles and weapons out at the prison in case anyone else surrounded the area as I approached, a little shocked to see her here watching from afar as Rick patted her down. He pulled her gun from her belt before pulling her from the fence and dragging her down to the floor. “Get down. On the floor.” He ordered her down to her knees.

“I asked if you were alone.” He exclaims before snatching her bag off over her head and shoulder, throwing it to Michonne. “I am.” She pants.

She clocks me and we stare for a second before Rick grabs her arm. “Welcome back. Get up.” He spits before dragging her towards the door to our cellblock, all of us following behind covering.

Daryl had chucked me the keys as we entered the common area as I was the last one coming in and I locked the cell door, turning to see Andrea and Carol hugging. Everyone spread around the room, looking on at them as I came down the few steps and leant on the railing at the bottom, crossing my arms. “After you saved me, we thought you were dead.” Carol spoke, almost in a whisper as they held each other.

Andrea didn’t respond, just holding Carol as her head started to tilt up, looking out in front of her behind Carol at Hershel. “Hershel, my god.” She chimes, noticing the missing part of his leg, coming out of the hold with Carol.

She looked around at us all, around the room, in a slight state of shock. “I can’t believe this.” She states. She continues looking around. “Where’s Shane?” she asks, looking to Rick who just looks around, not saying a word and neither does anyone else, but answering all the same.

“And Lori?” she questions. Rick stares at her for a second, before looking down.

“She had a girl. Lori didn’t survive.” Hershel explains.

“Neither did T-Dog.” Maggie adds.

“I’m so sorry.” Andrea says, looking around the group. “Carl,” she starts as she sees him, trying to be comforting but stops her words seeing his cold stare. She turns back to Rick. “Rick, I--,” she begins as he continues looking down before staring at her too with no words.

Andrea looks around at the room again. “You all live here?” she asks.

“Here and the cellblock.” Glenn answers.

“There?” she points towards the cell door leading into the cellblock, Glenn nodding ever so slightly. “Well, can I go in?” she asks before stepping forward.

Rick steps forward in front of her, blocking her. “I won’t allow that.” He states sternly.

“I’m not an enemy, Rick.” She retorts.

“We had that field, until your boyfriend tore down the fence with a truck and shot us up.” Rick explains.

“He said you fired first.” She announces, a little confused and in disbelief. Of course, he told her that. That man was a snake and he had Andrea wrapped around his finger, he had done since we both came into Woodbury.

“Well, he’s lying.” Rick spits.

“He killed an inmate who survived in here.” Hershel declares.

“We liked him. He was one of us.” Daryl points out.

“I didn’t know anything about that. As soon as I found out, I came.” She says before turning to Glenn and Maggie. “I didn’t even know you were in Woodbury until after the shootout. I only saw Y/N but Philip said you’d snuck in alone, came back to kill him.” She continues, facing me as she mentioned me. Philip? She clearly was close to the Governor.

“For once, that’s not all false. We didn’t come voluntarily, but I did try to kill him. You stopped me, remember.” I coldly and calmly say as she stares at me.

“Andrea, that was days ago.” Glenn points out.

“I told you, I came as soon as I could.” She reiterates in defence.

Andrea looked around at everyone, seeing they all had cold looks on their face, unconvinced by her. She turns to me, seeming a little annoyed. “What have you told them?” she spits.

“Nothing.” I simply reply, calmly.

“I don’t get it. I left Atlanta with you people, and now I’m the odd man out?” she points out in annoyance.

“He almost got Michonne killed, and he would of have killed us.” Glenn declares.

“With his finger on the trigger. Isn’t he the one who kidnapped you? Who beat you?” she raises her voice, pointing at Merle. No one responds. She sighs, holding her hands to her head. “I cannot excuse or explain what Philip has done, but I am here trying to bring us together. We have to work this out.” she announces.

“There’s nothing to work out. We’re gonna kill him. I don’t know how or when, but we will.” Rick states.

“We can settle this. There is room at Woodbury for- for all of you.” She says.

“Heh, you know better than that.” Merle chimes. “Yeah. You really think he’s gonna want to live with me and Merle after what’s happened. Let alone the rest of us.” I point out, earning another slight glare off of her.

“What makes you think this man wants to negotiate? Did he say that?” Hershel asks.

“No.” she answers.

“Then why did you come here?” Rick questions.

“Because he’s gearing up for war. The people are terrified. They see you as killers. They’re training to attack.” She answers.

“I’ll tell you what. Next time you see Philip, you tell him I’m gonna take his other eye for what he did.” Daryl says.

“We’ve taken too much shit for too long. He wants a war. He’s got one.” Glenn declares.

Andrea looks back to Rick. “Rick. If you don’t sit down and try to work this out, I don’t know what’s gonna happen. He has a whole town.” She speaks but he says nothing. “Look at you. You’ve lost so much already. You can’t stand alone anymore.” She continues looking to the rest of us.

Rick moves around in front of her. “You wanna make this right, you get us inside.” He declares. “No.” she quickly replies.

“Then we got nothing to talk about.” He spits backing away.

“There are innocent people.” She blurts as Rick walks away into the cellblock.

She sighs, looking back around to us all before facing me. “Can I talk to you for a sec?” Andrea orders more than asks, stepping towards the me and the stairs. “Go ahead.” I reply as she nears. “Outside?” she states as she stops at the first step before moving up the rest. I drop my arms and push off the railing. Perched on the table still, Daryl nods to me making sure I’m good and I nod back before following Andrea outside.

Both of us walked outside into the courtyard, my walk was slow as she walked ahead, stopping in front of me. “You’ve poisoned them.” she states, turning to face me.  
“I just told them the truth.” I answer.

“I didn’t choose him over you. I wanted a life. Once we entered Woodbury, you became hostile.” She announces.

“That’s cause I could see it.” I retort. “See what?” she spits.

“That you were under his spell from the second you laid eyes on him.” I explain.

“That is not true.” She retaliates. “And you still are.” I state.

“No. I am there because those people need me.” she defends.

“And what about us?” I ask, staying calm with my words as Andrea becomes defensive and annoyed.

“I am trying to save them too.” she declares.

I scoff, staring at her. “I did not realise the Messiah complex was contagious.” I mock.

“Go to hell, Y/N.” she spits, brushing past me to go back inside.

“You know he raped me.” I announce without turning to face her, stopping her before she got to the door. “With my own katana case. That’s one reason I went after in his apartment.” I continue.

“No. Philip wouldn’t do that.” Andrea defends.

I turn around to face her. “You think I’m lying? We spent eight months together, alone. You know me. You really think I’d lie about something like that?” I retort and she says nothing, looking down with a face of slight defeat.

“Eight months. Together on the road. You did choose him. After all that, you didn’t come with me. Mm-mm. You chose a warm bed over a friend. That was the other reason I went to his apartment. Expose him for what he is. I knew that it would hurt you.” I explain as I gradually walked up to her. We stared at each other and I could see the shock and hurt in her eyes, even some tears forming before gently brushing past her to go back inside. 

We were all waiting in the common room while Andrea was in the cellblock with Carol, meeting Judith. Coming back in from outside she’d said she was going to head back, but that she wanted to meet the baby before she did. Rick actually allowed it, to my surprise, easing up a little around her now. When Andrea eventually walked back into the common room with Carol, we all walked her outside back into the courtyard.

It was nearing sunset when we all came outside to see Andrea off back to Woodbury. Maggie and Carol opened the large steel gates at the back of the courtyard that led to a front part of the prison where all the squad cars were kept. Glenn drove one out into the courtyard, with the two closing the gates shut again. He parked it and get out to let Andrea in. She stood at the car with Rick as some of us stood around while others kept a look out.

“Can you spare it?” Andrea asks after being handed her bag back by Carl. “Yeah.” Rick replies.

She looks around at everyone, stopping at me as we shared a sad stare across the car.

“Well, take care.” She responds, getting in the car and shutting the door.

“Andrea.” Rick starts, before handing her back her gun and ammo. “Be careful.” He finishes.

“You too.” she replies before starting the car and driving towards the gate. Merle opened the gate, yelling ‘go’ for her to drive off quickly so he could close it again. We all watched as she drove away through the yard of walkers before heading back inside.

It had turned to night and after eating, we’d all convened in the lower cellblock. Morale seemed low lately and we stood and sat around the lower level, no one talking until Beth started to sing. I didn’t mind listening to her sing. She had a great voice and it was somewhat soothing to listen to. She was sat by a lantern and burning candles on the floor with Carol and Carl. Rick was coming down the stairs with Judith, passing Maggie sat on them at the bottom. Glenn came and sat next to her, putting his arm around her as Merle emerged out the common area, leaning on the open cell door to listen to Beth. Michonne sat with Hershel in the corner as Rick approached Daryl and I leant up against the wall near the lower cells. I had my head rested on his shoulder as I listened to Beth sing.

“Some reunion, huh?” Daryl quietly points out as Rick comes to stand next to me and I lift my head up, all of us looking over at everyone.

“She’s in a jam.” Rick replies. “We all are.” Daryl corrects. 

I sigh. “Andrea’s persuasive. She may be hand in hand with the Governor, but she’s under his thumb. He’s not giving her the full story. She wasn’t lying. I could tell.” I state.

“How?” Rick asks.

“Same way you probably could with everyone here. You spend eight months on the road with someone, you pick up on things.” I explain.

We take a moment before resuming the topic to the Governor.

“He’s armed to the teeth, bent on destruction, Rick.” I announce, keeping quiet still as Beth sang.

“So what you wanna do?” Daryl questions Rick.

“We match it. I’m going on a run.” Rick declares.

“I’ll head out tomorrow.” Daryl states.

“No, you stay here. Keep an eye on your brother. I’m glad you’re back, really. But if he causes a problem it’s on you.” Rick announces.

“I got him.” He replies. “What about Michonne?” He asks.

“She seems good to me. They both do.” I declare, looking from Daryl to Rick, referring to both her and Merle. “Yeah.” Rick replies.

We all watch Beth sing for a moment. “I’ll take you tomorrow, Y/N. And Carl. He’s ready.” He announces as I turn my head to face him. “We’re going back to our old town.” He adds.

I look at him in surprise. “You serious?” I ask. “Yeah. You up for it?” He questions. After a short moment, I nod in confirmation. We were going back to our homes. After everything that’s happened, after everywhere we’ve been, it felt odd to think we were going back. It was only to pass through, to look for guns and ammo, but the idea of going back to a place of a past life felt strange.

“You hold it down here, Daryl.” Rick orders, breaking me from my thoughts, gently rocking Judith in his arms to Beth’s singing.

“You got it.” he replies before we all look back to Beth.

“You be careful out there tomorrow, ya hear me.” Daryl whispers next to me. 

I turn my head to face him, giving him a small smile at his remark. “Nine lives, remember.” I tease before resting my head back on his shoulder and he brings his arm around my back, resting his hand on my hip as we all listened to Beth still singing her song, echoing through the cellblock.


	22. twenty two

It was quiet in the car. We’d set off that morning headed off to our old town, leaving Daryl to look over things and take charge while we were gone for the day. I was driving whilst Rick sat in the passenger seat and Carl in the back. I don’t think anyone was in the highest of moods as of recently and today hadn’t been an exception. No one talked as we drove. 

Coming along a road on our drive, I spotted a figure up ahead on the road. At first, I thought it was a lone walker but as we drove closer I realised a walker most likely wouldn’t have a bag strapped to it’s back. That’s when the figure turned and began waving his hands at us, shouting at us to stop.

“Hey! Hey! Slow down! Slow down! Slow” he yelled as he jumped and waved at us. None of us said a word about him, nor did I stop for the man. He broke into a run, his bright orange backpack and gear moving about on his back, as we came up next to him, seeing we weren’t stopping. “I’m begging you! Please!” he screamed as we drove past. Looking back in the rear view mirror I saw he dropped to his knees on the road. I started to feel a little guilty, slightly, he was alone and didn’t look like a threat at all. But he was soon forgotten the further we drove up the road, still no one saying a word.

Eventually, we came upon a wreckage in the road, some upturned and abandoned cars and an RV. I was forced to drive off the road onto the grassy strip of land that lined the road before the treeline of the woods. I drove slow between the wreckage on the road and one of the upturned cars that was on the grassy strip, passing the vehicles to see dead bodies in cars and a couple stuck walkers amongst the wreckage of it all. On my side, I heard snarls and saw a walker with half its body squashed under the upturned car on the grass, stuck under it as it clawed to get at our car to no avail. From looking at it, I’d drove too slow past it and abruptly came to a stop, bringing my attention back forward. I pushed my foot on the accelerator, revving the engine but the car doesn’t move. Great, we were stuck. In mud, no doubt. I keep trying, but still nothing.

I sigh, slapping my hands to my lap in frustration. “Sorry.” I say, looking over to Rick.

“Don’t be. Honest mistake.” He replies as he opens his door to get out. “Come on.” He calls to us both getting out and shutting the door.

Rick had already begun looking through the abandoned cars for things once Carl and I had joined up behind him. We weren’t exactly sure what he was looking for, so we stood watching him.

“Yeah, this’ll work.” He announces, holding up a couple items of clothing before walking around and picking up large and thick sticks around the grass. “Put something under the car, like this, with a little gravel and sticks. It gives you-“ Rick was explaining. “Traction.” I finish, arching the corner of my mouth into a small smile. He mirrored it. “Right.” He confirms.

“Carl, help me with this.” He asks as he crouches to the tires and Carl moves forward towards him. “Take these, copy what I’m doing.” He instructs, handing him some of the sticks and an item of clothing.

I walk back toward the driver’s side of the car around them. “Tell me when.” I say.

Waiting in the car to start the car, I suddenly hear a man shouting in the distance and look back in the rear view mirror.

“Hey! Help me! Begging you! Don’t leave! Please! Hey!” the man from before had caught up on the road far away in the distance, shouting at us and running for us once again. Rick and Carl had stood up to look at the man before Rick banged on the roof of the car for me to start the car. The engine ignites and I accelerate; the car moves forward out of the mud. 

“Let’s go.” I hear Rick say outside the car as the man continues shouting up the road. “I’m okay! Please! Please!” he yells as the other two get back in the car and I pull away. “No!” he screams as we pull back onto the road, driving off. I watch him stop running and a tiny bit of guilt runs through me again before I move my eyes back to the road. Silence once again taking over the car.

Having come into our old town, it looked even more of a sorry state than when we’d left it, about a year ago now. It was strange to think how our lives had changed so much in this last year. This place that was my home for years, Sophia’s home, now just looked like some abandoned tombstone of our past. Just a place we all left behind to rot, devoured by this new world we lived in. Making our way through the street, towards the police station, we noticed that someone had graffitied around the area, although we hadn’t seen anyone yet, but it wasn’t art, it was arrows.They were pointing in the direction we were headed but continued after the police station. Someone obviously wanted you to go somewhere, probably into a trap.

Rick led us through the station and I started to recall it from the last time we were here. We had only taken several guns from the weapons locker last time, taking as many as we could carry in the bag, leaving several more behind. I did think it would be incredibly lucky, after all this time, that there would be some left and I was right. As Rick walked into the locker, Carl and I behind him, there was nothing left, nothing but a few empty ammo boxes. Rick rubbed the back of his head as he walked into the locker, kicking one of the empty gun racks in frustration before holstering his gun with force. I walked over to a cluster of empty ammo boxes on the floor, picking up one single bullet from the floor. 

“The town stretches out quite a bit, did we have any other police stations or similar places in town?” I ask as I look at the bullet, noticing it would fit Rick’s Colt Python.

“No. I was the police here. It may stretch out, but it ain’t a big town.” He replies.

“I know. It was a reach.” I defeatedly retort, my arm falling to my side still holding the bullet. 

Rick sighs. “There’s other places to check. We may not get as many guns as were in here.” He announces. 

“We need as many guns as were in here. Ammo, too.” I interject looking around the empty locker.

“Yeah we do. But right now I only got a line on a couple. There’s a few places on our main street- bars, a liquor store. Owners had a gun or two behind the counter. The people didn’t know about it. I did. I signed the permits. They might still be there. Doc’s bar is closest, we’ll start there.” Rick explains.

The mention of Doc stirs a collection of memories, now sad ones, within me as I remember what our life was like here, when it was me, Sophia and Doc.

“Start somewhere else. There’s nothing at Doc’s.” I state.

“I signed a permit for him, he’s got a weapon.” Rick points out.

“Not any loaded ones.” I retort.

“How do you know? You check it at the start?” he asks.

“Somewhat. I knew the one he had behind the bar was always unloaded. The one’s on the wall were the same.” I answer.

“You knew him?” he questions. “Yeah. He took us in. I worked there. He became family.” I explain briefly, looking down as I thought about the man who granted us a new life here.

“He may have some ammo tucked away somewhere. It’s worth a look.” Rick points out.

“I worked there for over ten years. If he had ammo, I would have found it. I would have known where it was. It’s a dead end; empty guns are of no use. Anyway, I’d rather not go in and open up old wounds.” I announce.

Rick pats my shoulder gently. “We’ll start somewhere else.” He states.

Looking at him, I nod lightly, grateful, before holding up the single bullet in between us for him to take and he did as he realised what it was. “Come on, let’s go.” He motions to us both as he walks out the locker.

Walking back through the town, the arrows continued and got more frequent but painted words and short warnings began to appear on walls, paths, roads too. Warnings for us to leave. But we still hadn’t seen a single person around. We were following the arrows with caution as we headed further into the town. Eventually coming more towards the centre, we rounded a corner of a building to be faced with an abundance of what looked like traps in the street. Walking warily up to it all, I reached up, holding the handle of my katana on my back as Rick unholstered his gun. A cluster of cars, wooden pallets, metal cylinders, pretty much anything, had wooden spikes all stuck out and around from them. Vehicles and other things were lined staggered up the street, like deterrents and written on the road before it all was another painted warning. ‘turn around and live’ it said. Nothing about this was making me feel at ease. Rick and I shared a glance before he took a step forward to start making his way through it all, Carl and I beside him. There were ropes and wires stretched across the road, as well as rodents trapped in cages like bait. It was a street full of walker traps from the looks of it.

“Looks like somebody’s made the town theirs.” I state.

“Doesn’t mean they found what we’re looking for.” Rick points out as we gradually walk through and past the traps, ducking under rope.

“A couple of the places are just up ahead. Let’s get in and get the hell out of here.” he announces.

We duck under some barbed wire as Rick points a building out ahead in the street. “There. Terrell’s. Shotgun. Two handguns.” He declares. “Alright.” I say as Carl taps Rick’s arm looking behind us. We turn to see a walker stumbling towards us through the way we came amongst the deterrent filled street and Carl aims his gun at the walker, but Rick stops him.

“Wait. It’ll get caught.” He says and Carl lowers his gun. We watch the walker walk into the barbed wire, pressing against it and being held at a stop before she’s suddenly shot in the head but it didn’t come from Carl, it came from above somewhere.

“Hands!” a masked man shouts from a rooftop as we look up to him with our hands raised. “Now you drop what you’ve got, and you go! Your gun! Your shoes! And that sword! All of it! Ten seconds!” he demands holding a rifle at us from above, shouting.

“Run for the car now.” Rick orders quietly. “Dad?” Carl worryingly starts as the man begins counting down.

“We need that rifle.” I whisper as he shouts nine. Rick looks to me as if working out what to do next. “I think I can get up there.” I state as the man gets to six.

Rick looks back up to the man. “Carl. Go.” Rick orders before suddenly shooting at the man on the roof. I split and head towards the building as Rick takes fire. The man shoots at me too but I use everything in the street for cover as Rick and him shoot at each other. As I get to the side of the building, I can hear the man shooting down at Rick but no return fire from him as I start climbing a ladder on the side of the building to the roof. While climbing, the gunfire stops and when I get to the roof the man isn’t there. I quickly look around and he’s gone. I rush up to the edge to see Rick holding his gun up at the roof and shrug my confusion down to him as to where he’s gone when a moment later gunfire starts again from below the building. Rick moved along the street for better cover as the man followed up the pavement. I rushed to get back down the way I came up, listening the bullets echoing in the street when I hear a final gunshot before coming out onto the pavement. The man was on the ground and Carl was up in front of him, just having shot him with Rick behind him. They both moved towards the motionless man on the ground as I stood over him with my sword in hand and the both of them with their guns.

“You okay?” Rick asks, looking to Carl. “Yeah.” Carl plainly replies.

“I told you to run for the car. I didn’t want you to have to do that.” Rick points out.

“I had to.” Carl states. Rick looks at me as if slightly surprised, but I just raised my eyebrows with a small nod as if confirming what he’d said. He was a tough kid and could handle himself, I knew that already, I guess Rick hadn’t completely realised it yet.

He crouched down to one knee, next to the man on the ground and pounded his fist on his chest a couple times. The sound of protective gear coming from under his shirt.  
“He’s wearing body armour.” Rick states before ripping open the man’s shirt to reveal it with the bullet stuck in it. He unstrapped it from the side the bullet was on and lifted his shirt to see a bruise forming already from the impact. “He’s alive.” He announces. I don’t respond, I just watch as Rick goes to remove his mask and when he does, Rick shares the same look of shock on my face at the identity of the masked man. Holy shit. It was Morgan.

We’d moved him onto a gurney we found amongst all the stuff in the street before Rick and I checked out the entrance to the building Morgan had come out of as Carl watched over him, gun in hand. Wooden spikes lined outside the front of the door like a small pathway, leaning slightly inwards into the path, and I began to think that Morgan had quite obviously changed into a man I probably no longer knew.

“Keep an eye for booby traps. Looks like he’s gotten pretty creative so far.” Rick points out as we look over the entrance. 

“Yeah, you said it. We still gonna get in and get the hell out of here, like you said?” I question.

“We can’t leave him on the street.” He retorts.

“I didn’t say that. But once we get him in there, are we gonna get out of here?” I clarify.

“Don’t you want to at least see that he’s alright?” he asks.

“Yeah. And when he’s up there he will be. But I’m not sure I wanna stick around long enough to find out who he’s become.” I say and I can see Rick thinking about what I’d said. “Plus, you see or hear Duane anywhere?” I question, already knowing what must have happened and what must have inevitably lead Morgan to all this no doubt.

Both of us looked to the entrance. “You think he’s up there?” Rick asks. “Do you?” I answer as we share a look, both of us knowing he wouldn’t be.

Rick started to slowly walk forward towards the doorway and he ducked under one of the spikes that leaned in far into the path, making him go into a crouch before the doormat which was neatly sat in front of the door. It was sporting the words ‘welcome’ on it which seemed a little out of place and character.

“Don’t.” I quietly blurt causing Rick to retract his step and look back to me. “You said booby traps.” I elaborate and Rick faces back down to the mat. He peels it back and reveals and hole beneath it, the size of it, with blades and spikes sticking up from it. “Thank you.” He says.

“Let’s just get him inside and go.” I reply before turning and walking back to Carl and Morgan.

Rick and I had hold of him, both of us supporting each side with his arms across our shoulders as we brought him through the entrance and up some stairs which had a sheet at the top blocking whatever was waiting for us there with another painted warning. 

“Wait!” Rick suddenly breathed, stopping my movement onto the next step. I look down to see a thin, barely noticeable wire across the next step that I nearly just triggered. We carefully stepped over it and got Morgan over it before coming to the top after the last step and Rick pulled the sheet back that separated in the middle to reveal an axe. It was set up to swing at the pull of that wire and it was covered in blood. Looking at it in slight shock, we moved around it coming onto a floor of the building.

“Carl. Watch the wire.” Rick warns down to Carl behind us as he begins coming up the stairs.

We brought Morgan into what was an apartment he’d been inhabiting, dragging him through into a room. As we came into it, all we saw was guns, ammo, weapons, the room was full of them. That and the walls were covered in words, looking like inner thoughts of a man having lost his mind.

“I showed you two that weapons locker last year. He clearly went back.” Rick announces.

“This wasn’t all in it. Not even half.” I state.

“Yeah. He’s been busy.” He replies.

“The cot.” Rick says, nodding towards it on the other side of the room and we dragged the still unconscious Morgan over, laying him down on it. I went back over and joined Carl to pack up the weapons; grabbing a bag, starting to load up the guns as Cark loaded up ammo. We weren’t packing for long when Rick spoke out to us.

“No.” he says, causing us both to stop and look over to him. I see the largest writing on the wall first, the words saying ‘duane turned’. So, he had lost his son. His steppingstone to becoming whatever it was he’d turned into after being left alone whenever Duane turned and having no one there for him, stuck in a worse limbo than before with his wife. Then I notice the radio in Rick’s hand, the one that he’d given Morgan to stay in contact with, the one he never heard back from him from. “We’re going to wait for him to wake up. Make sure he’s okay.” Rick announces, turned to us.

“Rick, he tried to kill us.” I state.

“He told us to go. He didn’t know who we were.” Rick clarifies.

“If he didn’t recognise us, he’s changed.” I retort.

“He was your friend. You were with him. You saved me with him. How can you not want to at least see that he’s okay?” Rick questions.

“He tried to kill us and we didn’t leave him for walkers. We brought him back up here, he’s had a good day. He-- Rick- he’s a different person from when we last saw him. I don’t want to find out how different. Now, he doesn’t need half of these guns. We do.” I explain.

“We’re waiting for him to wake up. That’s it.” Rick reiterates.

“Have you taken a look around this place? The axe? The spikes? The walls?” I point out.

“You think he’s crazy?” Rick blurts.

“No. I think he’s dangerous.” I answer.

“We know him.” He declares. 

“We did. He may have been my friend- he may have been our friend, once, but do you really believe he’s gonna think the same when he wakes up?” I state.

“We’re gonna wait for him to wake up.” Rick declares, repeating himself.


	23. twenty three

Rick had seen and grabbed some zip ties. He had strode over to Morgan and was now tying his hands as Carl turned into the room before. I look around to see what it was that caught his attention to see him stepping towards and staring at a wall with a map drawn on it. I joined him in the room, standing next to him as we both looked on at it. It was a rough map of the town. I scanned over it, seeing descriptions of what had happened to some written over them, figuring out which was Doc’s house, where we lived. When I found it, I saw the words ‘taken’ which had been crossed out. There was probably not much left of it.

“What do you see?” Rick asks from behind us and I look to Carl. 

“It’s the neighbourhood.” He answers and I follow his eyeline to see him looking at a spot that I saw had a house with the writing ‘ricks house’ with ‘taken’ crossed out too but also ‘burnt out’ as well. So, they really had nothing left of their home. “It’s gone.” Carl adds before I turn back for the other room, going past Rick as he continued to talk to him. I looked around and found some food. I contemplated eating one of the bars for a second, I was hungry and now not in the best of moods. This run had gotten pretty heavy and depressing already, so I grabbed one of the bars and sat down as I unwrapped it. 

Rick, having heard the wrapper, turned to face me. “We’re eating his food, now?” he says coming back into the room.

I shrug. “Mat said ‘welcome’. Besides, it’s just one bar.” I defend as Rick starts organising weapons.

Carl after a moment approaches us back in the room, after having stared at the map long enough, and I could tell in his face that he was thinking of doing something, or at least wanted to do something.

“I’m going on a run.” he states. There it was. “Where?” Rick questions.

“I thought maybe the one thing people didn’t loot was cribs. And there’s that baby place that mom’s friend Sarah ran. It’s just around the corner.” Carl explains.

“Carl.” Rick starts, not liking the idea. “Dad. It’s just around the corner. And there’s all those walker traps.” Carl interrupts before he can say anything. I wasn’t sure if he was being genuine about the crib story, but he wanted to go out there for something and seeing as we were in our old town, whatever it was it was most likely important to him. So, I played along.

“You’re going to need some help carrying the box.” I announce, chewing my last mouthfuls on the bar. “What?” Carl questions, sounding a little confused.

“You’re going to get a crib, you have to get the box. It’s big and heavy. You’re going to need help carrying the box.” I explain. “You are getting a crib, right?” I ask.

“That’s what I said.” he answers.

“Then I’ll go with him.” I state, looking over to Rick.

He looks between us both, considering it. “Right there. That’s the deal.” Rick announces and Carl lightly nods. “You get into trouble, you holler, okay? I’ll hear it from here.” he affirms.

“Okay.” Carl replies before walking off to leave. I rise to a stand and strap my katana to my back, nodding at Rick assuring him we’d be fine, getting one in return before leaving to follow Carl.

He was marching out the building into the street amongst the traps and a few walkers had got themselves caught at the end but we were headed in the other direction. Carl strode in front of me as we walked along the street.

“You don’t have to come with me. I can handle it.” Carl announces.

“I said I’d help you.” I reply. “Yeah. Okay.” He says, a little dismissingly.

Coming to the other end of the street, a lone walker was staggering around and spotted us marching through.

“Guess you should take care of that.” Carl points out. “Mmhmm.” I mumble as I unsheathe my katana and walk towards it as it stumbles into some barbed wire. I stand in front of it as it claws at me before stabbing it through the head. It falls to the ground as I flick the blood and when I look back to Carl he’s not there. Looking around, I just catch him jogging around the corner of the street. 

“Shit.” I whisper to myself as I go to follow him. Sneaky. I’m surprised I didn’t see through it. I rush to catch up to him, coming around the corner and jog up behind him. He turns around just as my hand reaches his shoulder. “What the hell was that?” I question.

“I want to do this on my own.” He answers before starting to walk off again. I knew he wasn’t talking about a crib. He was walking off ahead and the baby place was right opposite us on the other side of the street.

“You just passed the baby place.” I point out.

Carl stopped ahead, turning back and sighed. “I’m getting Judith something else first, okay?” he finally admitted before resuming his walk away as I followed behind him.  
Carl had led me to one of the cafes in town. The windows were all dirtied and dusted up and after wiping at the door window, I could see there was a group of walkers in there. They were laying around, as if they were dormant but as soon as we made a noise they’d all be up. We’d need a plan if we were to even attempt to get anything from inside here. Just then, Carl goes to open the door, grabbing a hold of the doorknob but I stop him, grabbing his arm and pushing him back. I remembered this place had a bell on it’s door, alerting the workers someone had come in and we didn’t want to announce our presence this time. He resists and shrugs my hold off him, glaring at me but I return it. He soon marches off back towards the street, very visibly in a mood, as I follow behind.

“You think I was going to let you go in there?” I call out.

He turns around to face me. “I just think it’s none of your business.” He retorts.

I scoff. “You got a mouth on you today, kid.” I point out. “I came out here to help you get something. Not to help you get killed. If we’re gonna do something, we gotta be smart about it. Not just go in guns blazing everywhere.” I add.

“What do you think I’m doing. This is important. I’m going to do this. And I know how I can. You can’t stop me.” he declares before starting to walk off again. Carl was coming into his own mind and he was definitely Rick’s son, that was for sure. I was fighting a losing battle.

“Hey.” I call, stopping him. “I can’t stop you. But you can’t stop me from helping you.” I point out as I walk up to him. “What’s your plan, Sheriff?” I ask, trying to bring down his mood, flicking the front of his hat and it earnt me a small arch of a smile.

There was a photo in the café that Carl wanted, a photo of the family with Lori and I now understood why he was so insistent on doing this run. We’d taken a couple things back from the walker trap street. Two cages with a rat in each and strapped them to a skateboard each that were back there amongst all the junk. I opened the door carefully and slowly, bringing my hand around to hold the bell quiet before Carl pushed the two skateboards with the caged rats into the middle of the cafe. I held the door open only a crack so I could watch the walkers. The noise and the rat’s squeaks drew the group of walkers into the middle, trying to get at them in their cages. Once they were all occupied with the distraction, Carl quietly went in first as I followed, both if us making our way around the edge. We were behind a wall of dividers that separated the café seating area from the building wall, creating a walkway to the bar. We crept our way to it, watching over to see the walkers were still distracted with the rats. Carl climbed onto one of the stools as the photos of families were hung above around the bar. I stood next to him, keeping watch on the walkers as he reached for the framed photo. He’d just got it down from the wall when his ankle was suddenly grabbed from behind the bar. A walker pulled itself up from the floor, leaning over the bar but I stab it through the skull before it could do anything. I hold it there for a second, checking over at the group of walkers to see they haven’t heard anything. Holding the top of the walker’s head, I gradually pull my katana from its skull, quietly resting its head on the bar to not draw any attention. Carl got down from the bar stool, holding his photo, as we both crept back around the dividers and made our way along the walkway. When we got near the end, one of the rats scurried around the corner, making us stop, realising what that meant as the walkers staggered around the corner after it. I pulled Carl back, pushing him forward back the way we came.

“In the kitchen.” I order as we rush back towards the back.

As we pass the bar to the back, close to the kitchen doors a walker emerges from them and Carl takes it down with his gun and changes direction to go around the back, coming out on the other side of the bar. Another walker comes out the kitchen as I pass the doors and swing, taking its head off. I hear a snarl from behind, too close for comfort and bring my sword up over my head into the walker’s behind before following Carl. We ran through, coming into the seating area where a few walkers remained. Carl shot a couple, before flipping a table to block another from the door. He called out ‘no’ and I saw that he’d dropped the photo but it had been kicked by a walker. I grabbed his arm and I hurried him out there, slamming the door shut behind me where the walkers now clawed from the other side.

“I’ve got to go back in.” Carl states.

“Where is it?” I ask.

“It got kicked back. We have to go back in. We have to. I have to. It’s the only one left.” he exclaims as we stare at each other. I don’t say anything, thinking what to do.

“Fine.” He says going for the doorknob, but I stop him, grabbing his shoulder.

“Not like this.” I start. “Can you do something for me? Wait. Here.” I order. “No.” he retorts.

“No! No more bullshit.” I snap. “You wait here. That’s how we get it done.” I instruct and Carl holds our stare but eventually backs down, giving a defeated nod.

I sigh and nod towards the door for him to hold closed. As he takes over, I rush around for the back of the building. All the walkers would now be at the front entrance, so slipping in the back would now be easy. Any other walkers that were in the kitchen were now at the front with the rest. I slyly made my way through to the bar, keeping quiet as I overlooked the seating area and scanned for the photo on the floor. It had been kicked back into the middle of the space. If I kept my footsteps quiet and made sure not to touch anything, I could grab it, and that’s exactly what I did. I carefully placed one foot in front of the other, careful of the tables, chairs and things scattered everywhere, all while keeping my eye on the cluster of walkers still clawing at the front doors. I quietly crouched by the photo, now quite close to them, picking it up and rising back to a stand before backing the way I came, even more cautiously. Coming back to the bar, I see a piece of décor at the back of it that I had noticed before, it caught my eye again and I decided to take it before slyly fleeing back out the building. 

“Hey.” I call rounding the corner back to Carl, who was still leant up against the front door. He faced me as I held out his photo frame, a photo of him, Rick and Lori on one of his birthdays from the looks of it. He smiled as he looked down on it, which made me smile in turn.

“I just- I just thought Judith should- should know what her mom looked like. Thank you.” He gleamed. I patted his shoulder before we began walking back.

“I was gonna go back in, anyway.” I tease, picking up on his light mood. “I just couldn’t leave this behind.” I state, smiling, pulling out a small cat sculpture, covered in colourful squares from behind my back to show him.

“That? It’s ugly. Why would you go back in for that?” he questions; I could see he was stifling a small laugh.

“Yeah? Well, it is ugly, I’ll give you that.” I chuckle. “But, it’s full of colour, and I’m sick of looking at light grey and dark grey back there at the prison, alright. You work with what you can get.” I explain, both of us smirking.

“Fair enough.” He replies. “It’s still ugly, though.” He snorts.

“Yeah, alright. Let’s a crib now, shall we, punk?” I suggest, nudging his side.

On the way back to Rick and Morgan, we stopped off at the baby place and found a crib, along with some more baby supplies and formula, collecting it all in the crib to carry it back to the street. As we walked down the pavement, I could see someone up ahead moving around the traps. Coming closer, I clocked it was Morgan and I wondered what had happened when he woke when Rick came out the building with a collection of bags filled with weapons. Looked as if we got what we came for in the end and Morgan was letting us. Perhaps he wasn’t as far gone as I thought.

“Hey. I was just about to look for you.” Rick announces as we approach him.

“Sorry.” Carl says. “It’s alright. You’re here now.” he replies as we come up in front of him. I suddenly noticed blood coming from Rick’s left shoulder and Carl had to.   
Rick looked down to it before facing back up to us. “Ah, it’s nothing.” He assures.

“He do that?” I ask. “It’s nothing.” He repeats. I hold my hand out for me to take one of the bags and I strap it to my shoulder. “Thank you.” He says and I nod before Carl and I resume our walk, carrying the crib.

We walked through the traps towards Morgan ahead, who was collecting the trapped walkers to dispose of them from the looks of it. I watched him as we came closer, considering if I should converse with him or not.

“He’s okay?” I ask quietly. “No. He’s not.” Rick replies as we come up opposite him to leave. I decided to bite the bullet and say something. The man helped me once, he was a friend and I thought I’d regret it if I didn’t. 

“Morgan?” I call softly, stopping Carl and I with the crib and Rick too in front, and he slowly turned to face us. He looked me up and down, pausing a moment before speaking and for a second I thought he didn’t recognise me, that he’d forgotten me, that he had changed. 

“Y/N? You’re alive.” He spoke gently, slowly approaching us.

“Yes. Are you?” I question, referring to his state of body and mind considering how we found him. He stood in front of me and I could see the pain in his eyes, but I was glad to see it. It meant he hadn’t lost himself completely, he still felt emotions. He wasn’t just empty.

“I’m not sure.” He replies. It wasn’t a yes, but it wasn’t a no. It was at least something. I held the crib with one hand as I brought my other to his, squeezing it in a kind of comfort. 

“I’m sorry about Duane.” I whisper but he’s quick to dismiss it.

“Sophia?” he asks. I shake my head in response, looking to the ground. “I’m sorry too.” he whispers.

I let go of his hand, regaining the grip on the crib. “Take care of yourself. Don’t let the world-- don’t let your anger on the world consume you.” I say and he nods as he turns back to resume his disposal of the few walkers.

“Hey. Morgan. I had to shoot you. You know I had to, right?” Carl calls and Morgan looks to him, giving him a slight nod. “I’m sorry.” Carl adds before all of us step forward to leave.

“Hey, son.” Morgan calls over, turning our attention back to him. “Don’t ever be sorry, not for that.” He announces, before turning back to the gurney and we resumed to leave the street, to finally leave this, now, sorry town.

When we got back to the car at the edge of the town, we loaded everything into the boot and whatever didn’t fit, in the back next to Carl. I had seen a crossbow in one of the bags and I had got it out, strapping it to my back, thinking how Daryl would appreciate a nice, new one and I, a little selfishly, wanted to be the one to hand it to him. I walked round to pick up the last couple bags of weapons as Rick told Carl to get in the car. When I walked back to the boot, I caught him staring into space and I wondered if he was still seeing people, seeing Lori. I stepped forward to put the last two bags in the boot and snapped him from his stare and thoughts. 

“You see something?” I ask gently and he looks at me as if I caught him. “I know you see things. People. Lori. You told me yourself.” I add softly and he looks down like there was something wrong with it, but in truth, there wasn’t.

“I used to talk to my dad after he passed when I was little. I saw Sophia a couple times after the barn. It happens.” I explain, in an attempt to comfort him.   
He nods. “Wanna drive?” he asks. “Sure.” I reply.

“Good.” He says, handing me the keys. “I see things.” He mocks, arching the corner of his mouth into a small smile, which I return, before we walk to our sides of the car.  
The drive back was quiet like before, but this time it wasn’t clouded by a dark mood, it was just a comfortable silence. It had been a successful run. We’d got what we’d come for and in an abundance. We were more than equipped to fight the Governor and his men now. I just hoped we hadn’t left Morgan worse than we found him. I hoped he would be able to get out of the funk he had fallen into.

On the way back, the light had started to fade as we came back upon the wreckage on the road we’d got stuck by before. I drove around it on the other side, to avoid the risk of getting stuck again and got back onto the road with ease. Driving back along the road, we soon came across a bloodied carcass on the side of the road with blood stretched and splattered around the side of the road. An unlucky someone a few walkers had gotten to, but then I noticed the bright orange backpack, with gear attached to it. The unlucky someone had been that screaming man at the start of the day, pleading for us to stop. I cruised by it, as we all looked at it. If I hadn’t felt guilty before, I did now.

“Stop. Go back.” Rick quietly instructs. I looked at him before reversing the car back to the bright orange backpack. “Carl.” Rick says as the car came to a stop and Carl got out. He grabbed the pack and got back in before I resumed driving. It felt a little wrong to take from a dead man that we could have previously helped but there was nothing we could do about it now.

Daryl and Merle were in the courtyard on watch when we arrived back at the prison. They opened the gate for us to drive back in, both of them coming up to the car as we got out. I strapped the crossbow to my back before shutting the car door.

“You good?” Daryl questions as he stands in front of me, his hand on my arm comfortingly.

“Yeah. Been a long day, you know.” I reply.

“Get what ya were lookin’ for, Sheriff?” Merle asks from the other side of the car with Rick.

“Yeah. And then some.” He replies going to the boot with Carl and Merle behind him.

Daryl moves to look with them, but I touch his arm to stop him.

“I’ve got something you’ll like.” I announce before taking the crossbow off my back and holding it between us. He looks at it with a slight smile. “Merry Christmas, Dixon.” I joke.

“It ain’t Christmas.” He replies. I roll my eyes. “Well- happy birthday then.” I correct.

“Ain’t my birthday either, woman.” He retorts. “Would you just take the damn crossbow, you stubborn redneck.” I tease, pushing the crossbow into his body. He lets out a huff as I smirk.

“You think ya funny, don’t ya.” He toys.

I chuckle. “Well, I know it annoys you.” I reply, planting a light kiss on his cheek. “Mmhmm.” He mumbles back. “Thanks.” He says, putting his arm around my shoulder as we walked to the boot to help the others with all the bags and supplies.


	24. twenty four

The following day, it was back to our reality we faced at the prison. The run had felt like a break from it all. Sure, we’d been on that run because of the Governor, so we could fight him but the whole day felt like we were away from it all and now it was back to it. Daryl and I had managed to get some time alone when we got back, spending the night in the guard tower before the new day when Rick went to meet with the Governor. 

I hadn’t liked watching them go off that day. Daryl and Hershel had gone with Rick to this meeting, to an old feed store, an arranged spot by Andrea. We thought it best I wasn’t there, considering how much the Governor and I hated each other, it wouldn’t have helped the already tense situation. 

The rest of us were waiting back at the prison for them to return later in the day. A plan had been laid out by Rick and we had to stick to it. Everything was laid out on tables in the common area. We were organising and loading all the guns, ammo, all the weapons, so we could be ready for what came next. Merle of course, just watching. 

“Carl, come here.” I call and he walks around to me. “You stash these at the loading dock, alright.” I instruct, handing him a box of ammo. “Beth, put more up on the catwalk.” I add, handing her some next to me. “If anyone gets pinned down, we need to make sure that they have plenty of ammo.” I declare.

“Alright. I’m gonna go work on the cage outside.” Glenn announces, grabbing the welder and gear to make a hole in the cage around one of the entrance doors to the cellblock, so we could rest rifles through it. 

“What we should be doin’ is loadin’ some of this firepower in a truck and paying a visit to the Governor. We know where he is right now.” Merle suggests.

“You suggesting that we just go in and kill him?” Glenn questions.

“Yeah, I am.” Merle affirms.

“We told Rick and Daryl that we’d stay put.” I point out.

“I’ve changed my mind, girly. Being on the side line with my brother out there- ain’t sittin’ right with me.” he explains.

“Three of them are right in the middle of it. No idea we’re coming. They could get taken hostage or killed. A thousand things could go wrong.” Glenn points out as Carl comes up to his side, heading out with him to put the ammo out in place.

“And they will.” Merle states.

“My dad can take care of himself.” Carl snaps at Merle before walking up the steps past Glenn who stood by them.

“Sorry, son, but your dad’s head could be on a pike real soon.” Merle replies as Carl unlocks the cell door and walks out.

“Don’t say that to him.” I sternly say, giving him a glare as I loaded mags. He splayed out his hands, showing he’d stop.

“It’s not the right move. Not now. I don’t like Daryl, or the others, out there anymore than you do. But we can’t take the risk of putting them in the crossfire. It’s my decision. It’s final.” I declare and Merle backs down. Glenn heads outside to the cage and the rest of us continue loading the weapons as Merle wondered around. 

We’d finished loading the weapons and all gone into the cellblock out the common area, now only waiting for the others to return. When I heard Glenn shut the cellblock door, I came into the common area with Maggie to see how he’d got on with the cage, only to find Merle packing a bag with guns. I sighed. I got why he wanted to go, but he couldn’t.

“Hey, you’re not going.” Glenn calls down from the cell door.

“I don’t need permission.” Merle retorts.

Glenn and I share a look. “We can’t let you.” I say.

“You can’t stop me.” Merle declares.

“If you’re gonna live here with us, it’s gonna be on our terms.” Maggie states but he ignores her, bringing the bag off the table and stepping towards the stairs.

“If Michonne can do it, why can’t you?” Maggie calls out, raising her voice. 

He turns to face us. “’Cause it’s my brother out there, that’s why. What’s the matter with y’all?” he snaps.

“Don’t think you’re the only one worrying about Daryl, Merle. But we can’t risk it.” I spit back but he doesn’t respond, instead turning back and going up the steps, only to be stopped by Glenn standing in front of him.

“I’m not gonna let you put them in danger.” Glenn says calmly.

“Nut up already, boy. This guy cops a feel of your woman, and you pussy out like this. Get out of my way.” Merle retorts.

“No.” Glenn sternly answers, standing his ground. When Merle suddenly pushes Glenn but he moves to the side and grabs hold of his torso, pushing him back, sending them both down the stairs. In the struggle, Merle gets on top of Glenn.

“Merle!” I shout, for him to stop but he doesn’t of course. Maggie gets hold of Merle over him, getting him in a headlock as Glenn held him off, keeping his blade from stabbing him. I grabbed his arm with the blade, holding it back and away from Glenn. All four of us now in this struggle when a gunshot suddenly echoes in the room, causing us all to stop and look. Beth was stood by the table, holding a gun in the air to the ceiling, shooting to stop the commotion. Glenn aggressively pushes Merle’s hand off his chin as Maggie steps back. I grab hold of Merle’s other arm, holding them behind his back and he began to resist. 

“Let me go. Let me go!” he yells. I kneed his back to the ground, holding him there. 

“I will when you calm the hell down and accept that you stay here.” I order. “Can you do that?” I question but he doesn’t respond, but he also doesn’t resist, so I take it as a yes and let go. He brushes himself from me and rises to stand, storming off up the stairs onto the perch in the common room as the others dispersed. I watched him walk onto it and stand by the window, looking out for the return of his brother. He was worried and to be honest, so was I. They’d been out there a long time and I couldn’t wait to see them return. It’d put Merle at ease as well as me.

-

The Governor and Rick sat opposite each other at a table, not really getting anywhere through the day during their talks. They were staring for a moment until the Governor rose from the table, slowly stepping around the space they were occupying in the old barn.

“You know, the truth is, I didn’t want any of this. They chose me because there was nobody else around.” The Governor chuckles lightly. “And they still think that I’m the man that can keep them safe. They still think I know what I’m doing.” He adds, shrugging. 

He walks over to his weapons belt he’d hung up earlier, strapping it back to his waist. “I know you got guns. That was quite a stash you brought back.” he announces, finishing strapping his belt back. Rick tried to hide his annoyance he’d found out about the guns somehow. 

“My people, they’re not combat tested like yours are, but, I’ve got more of ‘em. So this Friday, we’ll go down to the last man.” He continues, walking back over to the table.  
“So let’s end it. Today. Let’s not do this. We can walk away.” he suggests and Rick stares, waiting for whatever was coming next out of his mouth. 

“You have something, that I want. One thing that makes this all right.” He tells Rick, standing over the table.  
“I’m not giving up the prison.” Rick declares.

The Governor chuckles as he takes his seat back at the table. “No, I- I don’t want your prison. That doesn’t sound safe at all. I mean, you lost your wife, another man.” He jabs.  
“We’re not moving on.” Rick sternly states.

“What good would that do me? Best you stay where I can keep my one good eye on you.” He replies, his evil smirk now turning to a cold flat expression before he begins to remove his eyepatch from his eye and head.

He stares at Rick, his wounded eye on show as if to defend his next words with reason.

“I want Y/N. Turn her over and this all goes away.” The Governor demands and annoyance runs through Rick. “She worth it. One woman, worth all those lives in your prison. Is she?” the Governor questions causing Rick to question what he’d have to do next.

“I don’t get it. You’ve obviously got big plans. So, why waste your time on a two-bit vendetta? Why risk it all? You could have a statue of yourself in the town square, Governor.” Rick goads. “Killing Y/N is sort of beneath you, don’t you think? He adds.

“You could save your son, save your daughter, everyone you know. It’s your choice.” The Governor states, unfazed.   
Rick goes back to feeling torn, taking a moment to think things over. His children, the whole group, versus Y/N. How could he make a choice a like that? 

“Say I give you Y/N, how do I know you’ll keep your word, that you’ll stop?” Rick questions.

The Governor leans onto the table, lacing his fists together. “You can have everything you want. I told you, I don’t care about you. You think about it. Tomorrow, before the sunset. I’ll be here.” he declares before rising from the table and walking out, Rick not far behind. 

-

Merle was residing in the common area, where he usually lurked around. I’d come back in from outside, stocking up our offence points with weapons and ammo. I’d put back on the table what I had left with me and headed into our cellblock, walking past Merle leant against the cell door. I could see he was watching me and was clearing itching to say something but I kept walking.

“You know I’m right.” He says. There it was.

I stopped and turned to see him stepping towards me. “Folks here, they’re strong. Good fighters. But they ain’t killers.” He continues.

“Rick is, Maggie is, Carl put down his own mother.” I retort.

“Mercy killin’, that don’t make him an assassin.” He points out.

“Mm. But you are.” I reply. 

He scoffs. “When I have to be. Just like you, girly.”

“You see me as an assassin?” I question.

“Ya crept in and attacked the Governor, didn’t ya? Left a callin’ card in one of his eyes.” He points out. I don’t respond, seeing he was actually making a fair point, but I stare at him in defiance, nonetheless. 

“Ya comin’ with me.” Merle starts and have to stop myself from rolling my eyes somewhat, that we were still on this. “Me and Daryl, we have a few calls we use when we hunt.” He continues. 

“I know. He taught me.” I interject.

“Well, there we go. Even better, girly. I’ll give him a heads up. He’ll warn the others. You shogun the Governor’s ass, I’ll take care of the rest. We’ll be home before you know it.” Merle explains.

“And what about Andrea?” I ask, humouring his idea.

“Bullets fly, she’s goin’ to have to make her choice real quick.” He replies.

“You’re on your own. You get people killed, it’s on you.” I state, raising my eyebrows at him as I stared, before turning to walk away.

-

We’d all come out into the courtyard, having heard Merle shout from the perch in the common area that they were back. Seeing Daryl was alright set me at ease, a lot, and I could tell it had done the same to Merle a little. Rick looked as if he was going to be delivering bad news, which he probably was, it was plastered on his face.  
“Let’s get inside.” He called out to us all and headed inside to the cellblock.

“What happened?” I ask Daryl, stood next to him at his bike, as everyone began to follow him inside.

“Don’t know. They came out and didn’t say a word to no one. Can’t be good.” he answers.

“Yeah. Can’t be.” I say. “Come on.” He urges and we walk inside after the others.

We all stood around in the cellblock, looking at Rick, waiting for him to announce whatever it was had gone down and been spoke about. I was stood with Daryl, leant against the wall with Merle at his side.

“So, I met this Governor. Sat with him for quite a while.” He began.

“Just the two of ya?” Merle asks and Rick nods.

“Should have gone when we had the chance.” Merle points out, looking to me and Glenn as he walks past us to stand behind us all.

“He wants us gone. Dead. He wants us dead, for what we did to Woodbury. We’re going to war.” He declares before walking out the cellblock. This was it. We were at the endgame with the Governor, and I was not going to see him win. 

-

Hershel joined Rick outside, up on the catwalk above the courtyard, standing with him looking out at the prison yard.

“The group’s taking it as well as could be expected. Merle and Michonne are convinced we should hit first. Carol and I think we should take our chances on the road. We’re in this together. So if we stay and fight, so be it.” Hershel tells Rick and he nods in response, creating a moment of silence between them.

“He gave me a choice. A way out.” Rick announces. 

“What does he want?” Hershel asks.

“Y/N.” Rick answers sombrely. 

“He’ll kill her.” Hershel states.

“And then kill us anyway.” Rick replies, taking a pause. “But what if he doesn’t? What if this is the answer?” he questions.

“Why didn’t you tell them?” Hershel asks.

“They need to be scared.” He answers.

“They are.” Hershel replies.

“Good. ‘Cause that’s the only way they’ll accept it.” Rick explains.

“They won’t. And you know they won’t. That’s why you haven’t said anything to them.” Hershel points out but Rick only looks to him, not responding. “She’s saved people’s lives. Sometimes at the sacrifice of her own. Merle, Andrea, Carol, Carl, Judith, yours. Then what she did for Maggie, with the Governor. She’s fought hard to be here, and to protect us, going through hell herself. She’s one of, if not the best fighter and shot we have. You know, they all look to her when you’re not here. She’s a natural leader, even if she doesn’t know it yet. She’s smart, skilled and not to mention well liked. Have you even thought about what Daryl is going to think about you even considering this?” Hershel explains but Rick just looks down in defeat, knowing that everything he’d said was true. He didn’t know what to do.

“She earned her rightful place amongst the group a long time ago, and at your side, Rick.” Hershel adds.

“Yeah. Yeah, I know. She has.” He answers, taking a sigh. “But if you had to choose between your daughter’s and her, you’d pick your daughters every time, right? Your children over anybody, right?” Rick questions and now Hershel didn’t know how to respond, knowing that any parent would do that. “Are you willing to sacrifice your daughter’s lives for her?” Rick adds.

Hershel sighs. “Why are you telling me?” he asks.

“Because- I’m hoping you can talk me out of it.” Rick answers.


	25. twenty five

“It’s the only way. No one else knows.” Rick states.

“You kept this from us all night? You going to tell them?” Glenn asks, having now been told of the situation the following morning.

“Not until after. We have to do it today. It has to be quiet.” Rick answers.

“How do you even suppose you’re gonna do this?” Glenn questions, still shocked.

“One of us tells her we need to talk, away from the others.” Rick explains.

Glenn looks to Hershel, who is looking down, not at all on board with the plan. “This is Y/N we’re talking about. She was the one who said we don’t exchange lives, and- she’s right. It just ain’t us, Rick.” Glenn argues.

“No. No, it isn’t.” Hershel snaps before walking away across the courtyard back towards the cell block.

“We do this, we avoid a fight. No one else dies.” Rick announces. 

“You do this- you think Daryl is going to let that happen, let that go? You go through with it; he’ll never forgive you. It’ll break the group, Rick.” Glenn points out.

“Better that than dead.” Rick retorts.

Glenn shakes his head, not agreeing with the plan in the slightest, looking away from Rick.

“Glenn. I don’t like it either, but this-- this is how we survive.” he defends.

“And that doesn’t include Y/N?” Glenn replies.

Rick sighs, looking down in defeat and the two stand there in silence. 

“Alright. Well, I suppose whatever you say goes, right?” Glenn spits, earning a slight glare from Rick.

“We need someone else.” Rick states after a moment. “And it can’t be Daryl or Maggie.” He adds.

“Yeah, no shit.” Glenn retorts. “Well, you know who it leaves. And you can talk to him.” Glenn points out before turning back to the cellblock, leaving Rick behind him.

-

Merle was crouched on the floor, ripping up bunk mattresses in another cellblock when Rick found him, climbing the stairs to the perch towards the cell he was currently in. He stopped at the top of the stairs when he came into Merle’s eyeline from across in the cell.

“Just lookin’ for a little vacation. Best dope I ever had was in a mattress. But, nope. Not there. This place must have been no fun at all.” Merle says, sitting himself down on the floor as Rick approached him.

“We need your help.” Rick states. Merle laughs. 

“Do you even know why you do the things you do? The choices you make.” Rick asks, slightly annoyed. Merle says nothing.

Rick sighs. “If we give the Governor Y/N, Woodbury stands down. I don’t like it, but it’s what needs to be done. And we need to make it quiet. We need your help with that.” Rick explains, bringing Merle to a stand from the floor of the cell.

“You ain’t told any if the others, huh?” Merle asks.

“Just Hershel, Glenn and you.” Rick answers.

“Huh. The inner circle. I’d be honoured, if you weren’t givin’ someone up who was in it.” Merle replies.

He scoffs. “You know, when we’d go out on runs he’d bash somebody’s skull, slash somebody’s throat. He’d say, never waste a bullet. And I always thought it was just an excuse. Nah. You go on. Give him that girl. He ain’t gonna kill her, you know. He’s just gonna do things to her, probably take out one of her eyes, both of ‘em most likely. You’d let that happen for a shot?” Merle explains, questioning Rick, who doesn’t respond, just stares.

“Huh. Y/N is the only one here, besides my brother, who even talks to me, you know that. Hell- she’s the only one who shows a little humanity towards me now that I’m here, after everything. Y’all people look at me like I’m the devil, grabbin’ her and those lovebirds up the way I did. Now y’all want to do the same damn thing I did, snatch someone up and deliver ‘em to the Governor.” Merle continues.

Rick looks down at his words, before regaining his stare on Merle. “Hm. You’re as cold as ice, Sheriff.” Merle adds and they stand in silence for a moment. 

“You’re going to need wire, not rope. Wire-- nothing she could chew through.” Merle suddenly announces.

He scoffs. “You know something? You’re right. I don’t know why I do the things I do. Never did. I’m a damn mystery to me. But, I’ll tell you what I do know. You ain’t got the spine for it. and I’ll tell you what else. That girl deserves better.” Merle coldly points out.

“We need to get her to the Governor by sunset.” Rick spits before walking off.

-

I wasn’t sure where Rick had been all morning, so I took matters into my own hands after his announcement last night. Getting the others to help with some defences for the prison. We’d managed to get some of the curled barbed wire from the top of the fences to make some more defences against their vehicles, after finding a couple tire spikes. Maggie, Carl and Beth were in the fence walkway, making noise to keep the walkers in the yard away from us as Daryl, Glenn and I laid the wire and spikes around the yard in places vehicles would drive into. Daryl and Glenn pulled the defences out the back of the truck, as I covered them from any stragglers coming at us, taking down a few walkers we’d drawn attention to.

“Come on, let’s go.” Daryl calls and I come back over and hop in the truck’s driver seat with the two of them sat in the back of the trailer. I drove the truck back up to the courtyard and found Rick opening the gate for us. As I parked, Daryl and Glenn hopped off the back towards Rick who approached the truck. I got out and headed towards them myself.

“They try to drive up to the gate again, maybe some blown tires will stop ‘em.” Daryl announces to Rick.

“That’s a good idea.” Rick affirms.

“It was Y/N’s.” Glenn adds and I see them share a quick look. I couldn’t tell if he was surprised or disappointed it was my idea, but I dismissed it, not thinking too much into it.

“We don’t have to win. We just have to make their getting at us more trouble than it’s worth.” I point out.

Rick nods, looking around the yard and back to Glenn as Maggie and the others came back into the courtyard. “Alright. Let’s go.” He says, walking towards our cellblock with the rest of us following.

-

“Merle! You down here? Merle!” Daryl calls out, coming to the generator room, looking for Merle as he couldn’t find him anywhere else. He hears sounds coming from the room and strides into it with his crossbow up only to find Merle stood in there, looking a little suspect. He dropped his bow.

“Hey, little brother. I was just about to holler back at ya.” Merle says.

“What the hell ya doin’ down here?” Daryl questions as he scans around the room. He moves to go past Merle but he moves in the way, blocking his way around one of the generators. “Just looking for a little uh- crystal meth.” He answers, earning a little disapproving look from Daryl before he turns back around. 

“Yeah, I know. I shouldn’t mess my- my life up when everything’s going so sweet, right?” Merle chuckles.

“You talked to Glenn yet? Daryl asks.

“And why would I do that?” Merle retorts.

“Come on, man. Are ya even gonna try with anybody? Try to fit in?” Daryl queries.

“And what? Sit in line and listen to ya Sheriff? Abide by his rules and plans and do what I’m told?” Merle counters.

“He got us here. He leads us. Whatever he says goes.” Daryl declares.

“Man. Do you even possess a pair of balls, little brother? Are they even attached? I mean, if they are, they belong to you. You’d just do whatever it was your Sheriff Rick told you, huh? No matter if you didn’t like it? You used to call people like that sheep. What happened to you?” Merle questions, trying to rile him up.

He doesn’t let it get to him. “What happened, with you and Glenn- everything that happened at Woodbury.” Daryl points out, bringing the topic back. “I’ve done worse.” Merle interjects. “You need to grow up. Things are different now. People do what they got to do or they die.” He adds.

“Can’t do things without people anymore man.” Daryl states.

Merle scoffs. “Maybe these people need somebody like me around, huh? Do their dirty work. The bad guy. That’s how y’all people see me, in’t it? Hell, maybe that’s how it is then, huh? Maybe your girl was wrong about me. Guess I’m always the bad guy, no matter what I do. How does that hit ya?” Merle says, sounding deflated.

Daryl holds Merle’s shoulder, an attempt to get through to him for once. “I just want my brother back.” he states softly.

Merle seems taken by surprise a little and doesn’t know what to say. “I’m here, man.” He mutters, looking away from Daryl, who removes his hand and moves to leave. Once, Daryl has left, Merle looks to the doorway after him, thinking about what he was doing and what it was going to do to his brother. They’d never shared a moment like that, a genuine show of affection or whatever it was but he shrugged it off before grabbing a phone for its wires. He walked around the generator to his bag he had sat on the floor, filled with supplies and a rifle, the one he didn’t want Daryl to see and start asking questions. 

-

Rick walked around the courtyard, looking amongst the junk that laid around in spots. He crouches down at finding a long wire, staring at it before he began wrapping it around his wrists. As he looked down at the wire around his wrists, he thought about what it was he was doing and tears formed in his eyes. He brought his fingers to his eyes, holding them to stop the tears from falling. Eventually removing his hand and composing himself, he looked up and suddenly saw Lori standing above him in the catwalk. He looks down away from her.

“You’re not there. She’s not there.” He whispers to himself and looks back up, only to see her again, smiling down to him still. He rubs his eyes, before looking back at his wrists.

Staring at the wire, he contemplates what it is he’s doing. In answer, he unravels the wire from his wrist and holds it in his hands. As he rises to a stand, he throws it to the side with force and heads back inside to the cellblock.

He finds Hershel sat at the table with Maggie and Beth when he walks into the common room. Before he can even say a word, Hershel calls out to him.

“Rick.” He calls as Maggie and Beth head inside the cellblock. “What you’re about to do-“ Hershel starts but Rick holds his hand up between them. “I can’t.” he interjects.

“I won’t.” he adds before walking off to call off the plan.

-

Merle had told me that Rick wanted us to go and check out a breach in the tombs, that we needed to see what we were dealing with before we brought the others to fix it up. Merle led me towards it through the tombs so we could see what the extent of the damage was and what could have caused it.

“So where is it?” I ask as we walked through the tombs.

“Around the corner. We got to clear some walkers, then get the others down here to barricade it. A breach like this could be an open invitation to the Governor.” He answers as we made our way down a hall. 

Thinking the Governor wouldn’t sneak in, he’d make a grand entrance and let us know he was here, I point out, “He’s not much for subtlety.” As we come towards the end of the hall. 

Low snarls start to come into earshot and we both stop. A couple walkers come around the corner and I see Merle look to me in the corner of my eye.

“Hey, you want to take your chances?” he says, gesturing to the walkers now approaching us.

“Well, mine is bigger than yours.” I joke, holding my sword and looking to him and his hand blade before stepping forward and stabbing the walker closest to me through the head. Merle then stabs the other as a few more walkers come around the corner. I stand there waiting for them to stumble upon us when I suddenly feel a pain at the back of my head and then nothing, everything goes black.


	26. twenty six

I’d never have thought it would have come down to this. But here I was. Merle had yet again, taken me hostage and was taking me to the Governor, but now it was under Rick’s order. I’d woken up with a bag over my head and the feeling of my hands tied. Merle took it off seeing I’d woken up and forced me to walk out the prison with him, to meet the Governor. I understood why I was going, it didn’t take much to figure out why, the Governor hated me the most for what I did. I just couldn’t believe Rick would hand me over to him. He must have been feeling desperate to save the lives of the group, but he should have known not to take the Governor at his word. He’d take me and still kill everyone, it’s who he was, and it was who I’d take great pleasure in killing once I got to him. I didn’t know how I’d do it, but I wasn’t going to let him be the one to kill me. 

We were walking on the road, headed to the old feed store where the Governor would be waiting, whilst I listened to Merle. I wasn’t surprised it was Merle doing this, that he agreed to it, but it still annoyed me. He had me on a wire lead connected to my tied hands, walking by his side. There was no point resisting, the wire would be near impossible to get out of without anything sharp and I was now more than willing to meet the Governor, for him to meet his end.

“Governor made Rick an offer- turn you over then we all give peace a chance. I agree with you though. He would have blinked.” Merle announces.

“But not you.” I poke.

Merle scoffs. “I’m bein’ straight with ya.” Merle retorts.

“Oh, and you were straight when you led me into the tombs?” I jab.

“Okay, maybe I wasn’t straight.” He admits.

“You put a bag over my head.” I add, assuring he wasn’t.

“I got it done. He wouldn’t uh. Keep moving.” Merle defends, pushing me a little to keep the pace up in front of him.

“Ya know, I figure that’s why I was back there in the first place, do the dirty work.” Merle theorises and I stop to face him as he comes to my side.

“You keep thinking like that, that’s all you’ll ever be doing.” I reply.

He stares at me until we hear snarls to our side. Merle looks over and chuckles lightly to himself looking at the walker crossing a yard to get to us.

“May I?” he says before unsheathing my katana and walking over to meet the walker. “I’ll take that as a yes.” He answers himself as I said nothing.

I watch him kill the walker with one swing to the head and he stands over it on the ground. He turns and looks back to me. “Huh. Ya know what? I figured ya woulda run.” Merle calls as he returned my sword to its case.

“Wanted my sword back before I get away.” I state with an obvious annoyed fake smile.

Merle laughs as he comes back over. “It may go down that way. But if I were you, I wouldn’t get my hopes up.” He points out before regaining a hold on the wire lead behind me again. “Move.” He orders and we carry on walking down the road.

-

Rick marches into the courtyard, finding Glenn and approaching him with determination. 

“It’s off. We’ll take our chances.” Rick announces as he strides over to him.

“Thank god. This is definitely the right call, Rick.” Glenn breathes.

“What’s off?” Daryl calls, having come out the cellblock into the courtyard. Rick and Glenn look at each other before Daryl continues. “You seen Y/N around? Merle? Can’t find either of ‘em.” He asks coming up to them both.

Rick takes a breath. “The Governor wants Y/N. Said he’d stop if we gave her over.” Rick states.

“Ain’t no way.” Daryl immediately replies.

“Daryl- I- I was gonna go through with it. I was, but-,” Rick starts to explain.

“Wait, you’re tellin’ me you was just gonna hand her over to the Governor. After everythin’!” Daryl interjects, yelling in frustration.

“Daryl, it’s off! She’s not going.” Glenn assures, raising his voice to get through Daryl’s yelling.

“Then where is she?” he snaps looking to Rick, who looks worried.

“What’s wrong?” Glenn asks.

“I can’t find Y/N or Merle either. They’ve gone.” He announces.

“Son of a bitch! So you got my brother to do your dirty work, and now they’re out there, on the way to the Governor!” Daryl yells. “Daryl-,” Rick holds his hand up to try and stop him yelling but Daryl continues. “You really think that prick is just gonna leave us alone?” he adds.

“Daryl! We don’t have time for this. You can shout at me later. But right now, we’ve got to find them. Where’d you last see Merle or Y/N?” Rick states and Daryl thinks for a second, collecting himself.

“Come on.” He says as he starts running off into the prison, Rick and Glenn behind him.

Daryl led them to the generator room, where he was last with Merle. He thought back how he slyly covered him from looking around the generators, not seeing much in it before, but now he did.

“He was in here. Said he was lookin’ for drugs. Said a lot of things, actually.” Daryl points out entering the room.

“Like what?” Rick asks as they walk around the generators.

“Don’t matter now.” Daryl replies before spotting a bag on the floor. “Here we go.” He says, crouching down and picking it up. “Yeah, he took her here.” he states, throwing the bag down with force and anger.

“Damn it. I’m going after her.” Rick declares going to walk out the room.

“Nah. You can’t track for shit.” Daryl announces, stopping him.

“Well, then both of us.” Rick retorts.

“Nah. Just me. I said I’d go and I’ll go. He’s my brother, and she’s my girl. I’ll be faster on my own and she probably ain’t your number one fan right about now.” Daryl explains as he walks past him and stands at the door. “Plus, when they come back here you need to be ready. Your family too.” he adds before leaving.

-

“I wanna be with my brother. My brother- he wants to be in the prison. Though, I’m not so sure after this. But, this little trip-- maybe it’ll keep that place standing. If I pull it off, maybe all is forgiven.” Merle says as we walk along a road coming into a small abandoned housing town.

“That’s a whole lot of maybes, Merle. And if you think that, then you’re an idiot.” I point out.

“You gotta play the hand you’re dealt. I only got one.” Merle defends as he spots a car in the first driveway we pass and walks towards it. 

“You gotta get over that. You asked me to do it, remember.” I retort as he checks inside the car, not responding. I can see the tyre is blown at the front and he eventually realises too, closing the door and walks back over to me.

“You talk about the weight of what you have to do, how you can handle it. A bad man, someone truly evil—they’re light as a feather. They don’t feel a thing.” I announce.

“I’ve killed sixteen men since all of this went down.” Merle admits looking remorseful. 

“This world makes us all killers, it’s inevitable now. But how you handle it, how you feel about it, shows if you’re a bad person or not. Now, the Governor- he’s lighter than a feather. You give off this persona that you don’t give a damn about no one but yourself. But just then, just now- you looked as if you were weighed down by a rock. You showed remorse when you thought about those sixteen men. We’ve all had to do bad things, Merle. Hell- Daryl and I beat on this kid once for information, just like you did Glenn. We’ve been there, we’ve done things and you’ve done some bad things. But you come back from it-- you’re not a bad person. Even if you don’t believe it and I’m the only one who can see the good buried within you.” I explain.

He stares, scrunching his mouth and chin as he nods, taking in what I’d said. “Let’s go.” He finally says, stepping forward as we hear snarls coming from the woods behind, spotting a cluster of walkers. We both start into a jog, going further into town away from the walkers.

“Alright. I think we’re good.” Merle announces as we came to a small motel along the side of the road, with a couple cars parked out front. We slowed into a walk as we approached the building by one of the cars.

“Yeah, we’re great.” I mock, being pulled by Merle in front by the wire to one of the pillars of the building. He ties the wire lead around it, keeping me held there as he walked to the car, proceeding to break into it as I watched. He managed to get in and was laying down under the wheel, trying to hot wire it. The engine sputtered a few times until it eventually started, but then it suddenly started blaring its car alarm. I wasn’t too worried, thinking Merle would cut it quickly and we could get out of here, but the alarm kept blaring and after a moment, moans and snarls started to mumble around. Looking around, a large amount of walkers were emerging from the woods ahead on the other side of the road, as well as every other direction, all coming towards us as the car alarm was still screaming.

“Merle!” I shout as walkers were getting closer to us in the car lot. 

The alarm was still going as Merle continued to try and turn it off. “Come on Merle!” I yell, trying to free my hands from the wire, to no avail, when a walker emerges from one of the motel rooms ahead, spotting me and stumbling over. I had no weapons and my hands weren’t getting out these wires. I was panicking. 

“Merle!” I shout once more as the walker staggered closer as well as another from the car lot, which was coming right for me. As soon as it was close enough, stepping in front of me, I kicked it which sent it to the ground. I stomped on its head with considerable force, smashing it in as the walker coming from one of the motel rooms comes at my side. I move to the side, running around it whilst I held my hands up by my neck, trapping it with the wire as I came around the pillar. Pulling the wire, it tightened around its neck, keeping it held against the pillar. I pulled as hard as I could, pressing my foot against the pillar to give myself enough force to pull the wire through her neck. I heard the alarm stop as Merle had finally managed to cut the car alarm just before I cut the head off the walker. I look over to see him killing a walker attacking him from the car door, he stabs its chest with his blade to push it off him before grabbing my katana from the car, swinging it around and slicing the walker.

Walkers were everywhere now, coming at us from all directions. I suddenly heard close moans from behind me and turned to see one coming out the motel room directly in front. It lunges forward and grabs me, stopping me from moving back to untangle the wire. I struggle with it for a second until it slumps to the ground, being shot in the head by Merle. He shoots several walkers closest in the car lot before running over and bringing his blade down on the wire, cutting me from the pillar.

“Let’s go!” he yells rushing back to the car and opening the door for me to get in before slamming it and quickly going around to get in himself and speeding off.

We’d been silent for a while in the car, which was a first for Merle I thought, as he drove us to the feed store. Sat in the car, I’d been thinking it all over. I was mad at Rick and a small part of me still was, but he’d been given an impossible ultimatum. His children, his new born daughter, were at the prison, as well as the rest of the group he was responsible for. He had to think about it, and he made a decision for the safety of the group. I couldn’t blame him for that; it was the Governor who had put him in this position in the first place, but he should have known that he wasn’t going to keep his word. So, in that respect, I was a little mad he’d decided to strike a deal with my life, rather than fight, not seeing through his lies. I’d bet anything the Governor was at this feed store, ready and waiting to ambush whoever arrived with me. I wondered what Merle actually had planned. The Governor wanted him dead as well as me; we were probably the two he wanted most dead and he was taking both of us straight to him. He had to have a plan. He couldn’t be that stupid; he knew how the Governor was. I don’t know how he always ended up in this situation. Even when he tried, and he seemed like he was back at the prison, he ended up right back in the dirty work. But that was him. He was the only one who could stop this recurring trait of his, no matter how many times I tried with him.

“You making this your thing then? You take out the trash?” I poke, after a long silence, getting slightly annoyed the more I thought about everything. 

“Don’t be so hard on yourself, girly.” Merle says.

“The Governor, Rick- anyone who needs their piss bucket emptied and you come a running.” I jab.

Merle chuckles but says nothing, unfazed. “Things are different for Daryl.” I add.

“Yeah, they are. Rick says jump and he wants to know how high.” Merle states.

I shake my head. “Rick respects him. Needs him. Even if I weren’t with Daryl, he wouldn’t have asked him to do this little job.” I point out.

“Nah, he wouldn’t, because he wants it done.” Merle defends. “You keep telling yourself that.” I retort.

“The truth is this could have been your shot. With your skills. A whole new beginning. But you choose to stay on the outside. You could have proved yourself to the group. To Daryl. Showed that you could live and play fairly under the same roof. But you still let the same man that left me back in Atlanta rule you. No matter what I do, no matter what I tell you. Daryl’s your brother, but he’s got a new family. And the sad thing is you could have been a part of it if you’d just tried. You had a chance to show you weren’t the bad guy, that you were more than what they thought of you. But no- you rolled over, played into it, and here we are.” I explain.

“You keep tryin’ to get under my skin, I’m gonna cut that tongue out. Your buddy’s turnin’ you over because he’s tryin’ to save his own ass. You’re as much on the outside as I am, girly.” Merle announces.

“Maybe. But once the Governor’s done with me at least I won’t have to live with myself.” I counter.

We go a little while with another silence and my annoyance fades, having got it out before, and my mind wondered. I stared out ahead of us, my head leant against the headrest.

“You said you killed sixteen men since this thing started? You ever kill anyone before?” I question gently out the blue, once again breaking the silence. 

“No.” Merle softly answers.

I roll my head to face him. “And how about before Woodbury? Before you met him?” I ask and Merle shoots me a little glare, not saying a word seeing where my point was going, but still answering all the same.

“Hm. So, he saved your life, cleaned you up, fed you a line of bullshit. Why would you kill somebody else for him?” I question but he still doesn’t respond, not even looking at me this time.

“You know, we can go back.” I point out.

“Hm. Ain’t happening.” He states with a smirk.

“Both of us. We can just go back. It’s that easy, it’s not too late.” I assure.

Merle shakes his head and he looks slightly deflated. “I can’t go back. Don’t you understand that? I can’t.” he dismisses.

“Why?” I ask and he hits the brakes, bringing the car to a stop in the road. He stares at the wheel as I stared at him, waiting for a response. He eventually turns, resting his arm on the shoulder of my seat, moving his stare to me before suddenly cutting the wire around my hands with his blade. I look down at my wrists and remove the wires before looking back to Merle, his face full of emotion. He looked almost sad. 

“You go back with him. Get ready for what’s next.” Merle instructs as I hold my stare on him. “I’ve got somethin’ I’ve got to do on my own.” He adds.

He nods to the door for me to get out, but I don’t, I just keep my stare. I knew what he wanted to do; was going to do. “You don’t have do it alone, you know. We can go together. Ambush their probable ambush. Take him out.” I suggest and he starts shaking his head as I continue. “Be the two assassins you wanted us to be, right.” I joke, with a small smile and he lets out a light chuckle looking out ahead at the road.

“Merle, if you’re worried about coming back, don’t be. What you’ve just done proves you can live with the rest of them. What I said earlier, I was annoyed. The man in Atlanta, he is gone. You’ve changed and you know you have. Coming back will prove it to the rest of them. You don’t have to do this. You can come back. We just turn back together.” I explain.

He faces me, sadness in his eyes. “Nah. This is just somethin’ I gotta do.” He reiterates.

“Well- like I said- you don’t have to do it alone.” I state.

He holds my stare before breaking it as it got emotionally tense. “Y/N, would ya just get your fine ass out the car.” He says as he leans over and opens my car door. I scoff in amusement and smile at him. “What?” he asks leaning back, seeing my smile. I then lean over and plant a light kiss on his cheek. He squirms slightly as I lean back, unsure of what to do or make of it.

“The hell was that for?” he questions, looking a little uncomfortable, probably not at all used to any sign of affection.

“You’ve never called me by name before, Merle. I told you, you’ve changed.” I point out.

He stares, swallowing before turning his confused expression into an amused smirk. “Just get out of the car, Samurai.” He orders nodding to the open door.

My smile turns sad. “Go on, get.” He adds and I reluctantly get out the car.

Standing in the open door, I look back in and he hands my katana back to me from his side.

“A mighty weapon, for a mighty woman.” He says after I took it from him, strapping it to my back and give him an appreciate, but still sad smile. I knew I probably wasn’t going to see him again. I hoped that I was wrong. I’d just got through to him, truly this time.

He was slightly smirking now. “Hey, I’m sorry for bein’ such an ass.” he apologises.  
“Yeah, I know. You’re forgiven, Dixon.” I assure.

“Good.” he replies. “You keep makin’ Daryl happy, girly. Keep that baby brother of mine on his toes.” He teases. I nod in response, smiling at him, holding the door open still. He then nods once more at the door, making me look to it.

“Be seeing ya, Y/N.” he says as I close the car door and he drives off.

I stand there, watching him drive away. He’d just said goodbye without saying the words. I shouldn’t have got out that car. I looked back and I knew I couldn’t go back to the prison, not yet. Whatever he was thinking of doing, I didn’t want to leave him to do it on his own. So, I start following and head for the feed store after him, hoping I’d catch him on the way, figuring he’d stop somewhere before to figure out a plan.

I hadn’t come across Merle yet, but I still kept hope I would. I’d been jogging and walking, switching between the two, after him for a little while when I came across a few walkers. I’d killed them easily and as I swung at the last one I heard a familiar voice.

“Y/N!” Daryl called.

I turned to see him jogging up to me. He’d tracked us all this way. I sheathed my katana as he came in front of me, putting his hand on my shoulder as he looked me over. “You good? I didn’t know I swear. I’d never have let ‘em.” He states, his words coming out quick. “I know. Daryl we’ve-” I reply, about to tell him we had to move, to keep going after Merle but he interjects.

Where’s Merle?” he questions, seeming understandably worried and confused.

“He let me go. But I’m going after him. He’s gone after the Governor and I’m afraid he’s gonna do something stupid. We gotta go.” I explain quickly, stepping backwards as I said we had to go, to start moving.

“Come on.” Daryl says, touching my arm to turn me around as we both broke into a run after Merle. I just hoped we weren’t too late.

-

Rick had gathered everyone outside in the courtyard. Hershel, Beth, Carl and Carol, who was holding Judith, were sat at a table as Rick came back to them having got Glenn and Maggie from watch to join. Rick stood in front of everyone as they both walked and stood beside the others at the table. They all looked to him, waiting to hear what he had to say.  
“When I met with the Governor, he offered me a deal. He said—he said he would leave us alone if I gave him Y/N. And I was gonna do that. To keep us safe.” He began and the few that didn’t know, looked around at each other, obviously noticing certain people weren’t here.

“Well, I changed my mind. But now Merle took Y/N to fulfil the deal and Daryl went to stop him. And I don’t know if it’s too late. I was wrong not to tell you. And I’m sorry.” He continues, looking down in guilt.

“What I said last year, that first night after the farm-- it can’t be like that. It can’t. what we do, what we’re willing to do, who we are-- it’s not my call. It can’t be. I couldn’t sacrifice one of us for the greater good because – because we are the greater good. we’re the reason we’re still here, not me. This is life and death. How you live, how you die-- it isn’t up to me. I’m not your Governor. We choose to go. We choose to stay. We stick together. We vote. We can stay and we can fight, or we can go.” Rick explains, leaving them with the thought as he walks off to take over watch.

-

Arriving at the old feed store, it was a mess. There were walkers feeding on bodies dotted around all over. They’d been a fight. It was eerily quiet, except for the eating and munching sounds from the walkers scattered around. Walking through the place, I spotted the car Merle was driving, sat in the middle of the area, with the driver door open and bullet holes now decorating it. We moved through, seeing dead bodies and walkers, one after another. Coming near to a couple walkers sat, hunched over, eating, the closest heard and moved around to see us coming towards it. Daryl stopped to shoot it as I kept walking ahead, I knew he’d kill it before I got to it. The walker got up to a stand, only to fall back down by Daryl’s arrow. I walked past it to get to the other in front ahead as Daryl came up to the one he killed to collect his arrow. While he did, I came to stop, not too far away but not too close either from the walker still eating in front. Except it wasn’t just a walker. I’d come to a stop because I suddenly noticed this walker had a metal contraption on its arm, with a blade for a hand. I was looking at Merle, now a walker. 

The realisation made me look down and close my eyes, not really wanting to see him this way. He’d sacrificed himself for us. He had gone on a suicide mission and we had been too late. I felt Daryl come to a stop at my side, making me open my eyes and look to him. The realisation hitting him as he looked on at his brother, I could see the sorrow brewing in his eyes while he stared. Turning back to Merle, I could feel my own sadness building tears in my eyes as he stopped eating and looked up at us. I heard Daryl start to sniffle as Merle rose up, turning into quiet cries when he got to a stand. Silent tears fell down my face at it all, especially when I saw he had a gunshot wound in his chest. He’d been shot and probably purposefully that way, so he’d turn. It only fuelled my hate for the Governor more, whether he did it himself or not.

There was nothing I could do but watch as Daryl was inevitably going to have to put down his own brother. The only thing I could do was be there when he did, like he had been for me with Sophia. Merle stumbled over the body he was eating, approaching us. Daryl kind of shrivelled at the sight of the snarling Merle, his cries increasing in volume, before he finally stepped forward, pushing Merle back as he got in front of him. Merle came at him again, and Daryl pushed him a second time. He repeated himself until the fourth time, he stabbed Merle in the chest, pushing him back until he stumbled to the ground with Daryl on top of him. He breathed heavily before suddenly stabbing Merle in the head. I looked on in slight shock and sadness watching him now repeatedly stab Merle’s head, grunting and gasping with every blow through his cries. He wasn’t stopping, so I came up crouching behind him and grabbed his body, wrapping my arms around his chest. I pulled him off of Merle, the two of us falling backwards to the ground with him still held in my arms. Daryl was still breathing heavy, he let out cries and gasps as we just sat there on the ground, both of us crying as we looked on at Merle’s body. I forced myself and my tears to fall quietly, wanting to stay somewhat composed for Daryl as I held him. The only thing I could do after losing his brother. So, I didn’t let go of him; I didn’t want him to feel alone.


	27. twenty seven

Rick and the rest of us, all of us, had to seriously consider if the prison was worth defending, worth fighting for, as the Governor’s impending attack loomed over our heads. We’d come to the decision that it was. We’d lost people here, that was true, but it only meant fighting for it and making it a home was all the more important. That we didn’t lose people for nothing. We’d come up with a plan and it was to let them in, but only to drive them out. We would pack everything up, make the place look like we’ve already left to get their guard down slightly and then drive them out, in the hopes they wouldn’t return.

Coming back to the prison beforehand, I found everyone to look relieved at my return with Daryl and they embraced me when greeted. It was nice to see but Rick looked the most guilty I’d seen him and didn’t greet me like the others, instead somewhat avoiding me. He’d approached Daryl to my side as others came to me and asked of Merle. Daryl didn’t use words, just shaking his head in response, still grieving. Rick looked to me but said nothing, just one slight nod before looking and stepping away. I didn’t blame him for wanting to avoid me after what happened, so I let him do so until I felt it right to approach him, knowing I’d be the one to do it.

We had all packed up our stuff from the cells, the common area, everywhere, and loaded it up in the cars. Hiding our weapons away where they wouldn’t find them. We were all outside, packing the last few bits before we had to get ready for the rest of the plan. I was putting a box of my things in the boot of one of the cars as Carl walked past to another. Rick went to stop and talk to him.

“Carl.” He spoke, touching his arm to stop him but Carl shrugs him off, making his annoyance apparent, as he continued walking on. He didn’t like the plan, but mainly because he wasn’t going to be fighting, that we weren’t really fighting, not how he imagined.

I walked over to Daryl besides the car, who was packing up his last bits onto his bike.

“You know, Merle never did nothin’ like that his whole life.” He says crouched next to his bike.

“He became the good man I knew he was. He gave us a chance.” I assure. I hold out my hand for him to take; he holds it as he rises to a stand. I squeeze it a little, bringing it up and lightly kissing his hand before letting it go.

I see Rick head back into the cellblock and decide to take this moment to talk to him. I wanted him to know I wasn’t mad before the Governor attacked and god forbid something happened. I walked through the common area into the cellblock to find Rick coming down the stairs from the perch, probably checking we got everything. He clocked me at the cell door, stopping on the stairs and looking down before resuming to descend them. He gradually walked forward, approaching as I began to talk to him.

“I’ve never seen Carl so visibly mad. Even with Lori, he just shut down.” I announce, easing into the conversation.

“He’s still a kid. It’s easy to forget.” He replies.

I nod, agreeing, creating a pause between us as he came to stand in front of me. We looked at one another.

“The deal the Governor offered about me. You had to think about it. You had to. I get it.” I assure him and the look of slight surprise crosses his face, probably expecting me to say something else. 

“Yeah. Well, I’m sorry. I came real close.” He speaks softly.

“But you didn’t.” I point out.

He looks at me, still with a sad expression of slight surprise that I perhaps wasn’t angry with him. “You saved me. You’ve saved my kids, saved others. I’m just sorry I’ve let you down, twice now. I know sorry doesn’t quite cover it but-,” he begins but I interrupt him.

“I know. I know.” I gently interject, touching his arm in comfort and assurance.

“Shouldn’t you be mad. How can you forgive something so easily?” he questions.

“Because it’s easier to forgive some things than hold grudges. They’ll only drive us apart, and there’s plenty of people out there that will try and do that to us anyway. We go through it all as one; we deal with them as a group. When we face things- when we overcome things together- it’ll only make us stronger.” I answer, giving him a comforting smile.

“Come on. We’re ready out there. Merle gave us a chance, let’s not waste it.” I declare, stepping around to walk out, Rick by my side as we walked through the common room.

“What he did- letting you go. Giving us a fighting chance. You said he was good. The only one who was willing to see it; you were right.” Rick states as we walked up to the cell door out the common area. 

“Yeah. It’s just a shame he didn’t realise it sooner.” I point out, before we came back out into the courtyard.

The plan was in motion, everyone was in their place. Carl, Hershel, Beth and Judith were outside the prison, hidden and covered in the treeline, away from any gunfire, while Maggie and Glenn were in the courtyard. Maggie placed in the catwalk and Glenn in one of the fortified cages to one of the prison entrances, both tucked away until their part. The rest of us were in our place inside the prison. It was just a waiting game now.

At some point the rubble of an explosion erupted outside from the yard. The Governor had arrived, and an array of gunfire followed. We waited for them to come inside the prison. They’d go in the cellblock first, sweeping the place before coming into the tombs, where we were waiting for them.

The tombs echoed every sound, so we heard them enter, no matter how quiet they were and how slowly they swept the corridors looking for us. They got closer and closer to where we were, tucked around a couple corners at the end of a hall that split off in two opposite direction. Some of us were one side, the rest the other. Rick was stood at the corner of one side with Michonne and Carol behind him, while I was stood at the other with Daryl behind me. It was dark, and we could just about see each other. So, when the Governor and his people came into the corridor, getting close enough to our end, I saw Rick’s nod signalling us. I nudged Daryl and he, and Michonne on the other side, detonated the smoke and flash grenades throwing them into the corridor with the people of Woodbury. They scream at the commotion and gunfire ensues. Rick and I shooting at them from the corners through the smoke, which had now set off the alarms. I could hear the Governor shouting at his people to hold their fire, but they were screaming and panicking. Rick, Michonne and Carol, with the cover of the smoke, quickly made their way to our corner on our side, having let the walkers out from behind a cell door at the end of theirs. They made sure they followed them up their corridor before racing ahead over to us. We stayed flat against the wall and kept quiet, ceasing shooting, slightly covered by the smoke, so the walkers would turn up the corridor through the smoke following the people’s screams and shouts, cutting them off and driving them back out, forcing them to flee. And it worked. They were still screaming in panic as they’d started to shoot the walkers but were retreating as they did, seeing as I heard the Governor shouting for them to stand their ground. They soon fled out the tombs, but we waited where we were for the smoke to clear. 

Gunfire was heard outside, meaning they’d got back out into the courtyard and were now facing Maggie and Glenn’s ambush. We’d made them wear the riot gear, head to toe, to protect them from any retaliation fire. Once the smoke cleared, we proceeded to take out any last walkers that were now roaming the tombs before heading back outside. Not wanting any surprises later on. We quickly swept the tombs, killing the last walkers with ease, during which the gunfire had stopped outside, and turning the alarm off from the generator room as we did.

Coming back outside from another cellblock, we met Glenn and Maggie in the courtyard as we spotted Hershel and the others now entering back into our cellblock. Coming up to the courtyard gate, which had been closed now, all of us outside looked out at the yard. They were gone and had fled back to Woodbury. One of their trucks was left, right in a spot we’d laid some of the tire spikes and barbed wire. I was glad to see my idea had worked with one of them. Our yard entrance guard tower was on fire, clearly what the explosion had been. All the walkers in the yard were now dead, having been shot down by the people so they didn’t have to worry about getting attacked by them in their assault. Guess they did us one favour, but many would soon be at the fences having heard all the noise, so really, they hadn’t. Despite the destruction, we’d drove them out. But they were still out there, which meant it wasn’t over. 

“We did it. We drove ‘em out.” Rick announces.

“We should go after them.” I declare.

“We should finish it.” Daryl backs, nodding in agreement. 

“It is finished. They hightailed it outta here.” Maggie points out.

“They could regroup.” I argue.

“Yeah, we can’t take that chance. He’s not gonna stop.” Glenn announces.

“They’re right. We can’t keep living like this.” Carol agrees.

“So we take the fight back to Woodbury? We barely made it back last time.” Maggie counters.

“He don’t care.” Daryl retorts.

“Yeah.” Rick mumbles, listening to everyone’s words. “Let’s check on the others.” He says and we all head back into the cellblock.

Having seen the others were okay, it was decided we’d go after them, after him, and finish it. If we got them on the run, got them at their weakest, we could take them down. Stopping this feud, letting everyone live in peace with the Governor dead; that was the only way I wanted to see this end. With the Governor dead at the end of my sword. Or a bullet between the eyes, I wasn’t going to be picky, as long as he was dead. 

We unloaded one of the vehicles, a few of unpacking it as others took things back inside, so we could load up to drive to Woodbury and end this. We were just about ready, the truck was and Daryl now had his bike pulled up beside it. I closed the truck door as Rick called my name. I look over at him about to pass me, holding his rifle out for me to take. I grab hold of it and step out to see where it was he was going. I watched him approach Carl, who was still in his mood, but he’d apparently shot down a kid. Hershel had told me this boy, a little older than Carl, was handing over his weapon when he’d been trying to get away through the woods, being left behind. It was a cold and savage action, but that didn’t mean it wasn’t true and I believed it was. Everything Carl had been through and witnessed was making him this way in these situations and it wasn’t exactly his fault. He was a kid growing up in a cold and cruel world. I leant against the truck, waiting for Rick as he crouched before Carl. I began to hear and listen to them talk.

“Hershel told me about the boy you shot.” Rick announces.

“He had a gun.” Carl states.

Rick lightly nods his head. “Hm.” he mumbles. “Was he handing it over?” he asks.

“He had just attacked us.” Carl points out, avoiding the answer.

“Yeah. Yes, he had. Was he handing it over?” Rick questions again.

They stared at each other. “I couldn’t take the chance. I didn’t kill the walker that killed Dale. Look what happened.” Carl defends.

“Son, that is not the same thing.” Rick points out.

“You didn’t kill Andrew. And he came back and killed mom. You were in a room with the Governor, and you let him go. And then he killed Merle. I did what I had to do. Now go. So he doesn’t kill anymore of us.” he argues before walking off back into the cellblock. He was mad and his argument made sense, it was just cold.

Rick walked back over to us all, looking a little crushed and deflated. I pushed off the truck, holding the rifle back out to him.

“Thanks.” He says standing before me. “He’ll come around. He’ll see and he’ll learn in time.” I assure him before we stepped over to the others.

“Rick, we’re staying. We don’t know where the Governor is. If he comes back, we’ll hold him off.” Glenn announces.

“Just the four of us?” Daryl questions. “Alright.” He nods, strapping his rifle to his back.

“Well, I appreciate you staying.” Rick thanks before we move to our vehicles. Rick and Michonne get in the car as I hop on the back of Daryl’s bike. It been a minute since I had, so I opted for it rather than the car and it meant I was close to Daryl. The others got the gate open, stabbing walkers through it before and after as we left.

We were headed to Woodbury but it wasn’t too long before we came across one of Woodbury’s vehicles in the road, abandoned. But what was odd was that there were bodies laid around, with some walkers now feasting on a few of them. we stopped before it and I hopped off the bike as Daryl cut the engine and put the bike stand down. I unsheathed my katana as Rick and Michonne got out the truck, holding their rifles and Daryl with his crossbow. No one was here but the dead. What had happened? We walked over to the large vehicle, Daryl shooting a walker as I killed another. I walked up to a couple more over the same body and sliced both their heads in one swing. Rick walked up ahead and stabbed another at a car with his knife when suddenly a thud came from inside the large tanker truck Daryl and I were stood beside. The pound made Daryl duck and move back, bringing his crossbow up to the noise. It was a woman with her hands splayed on the glass, she looked distressed. Rick came striding over with his python cocked, Michonne too with her rifle, both pointed at the woman. Daryl opened the door and motioned for her to get out. when she hopped down and out, he glanced inside to see no one else was before closing the door. Rick laid down his gun, causing Michonne to do the same but I kept a firm grip on my sword.

“Where is he?” Rick questions.

“I don’t know. He left. He shot at us and left.” the woman explains. So he shot on his own people. He massacred them. All of them. He really had gone over the edge. 

We looked at one another, not sure what to say until the woman spoke again. “Is Andrea with you? Did she make it?” she asks and our looks of pity turned to confusion.

“Why would she be with us? What happened?” I question.

“She left. Got over the wall, headed for the prison. I wondered if she made it.” she answers. Andrea never made it to us which meant she was either taken down by walkers in the woods or taken back by the Governor, and I was betting it was the latter. If she escaped to come to us and didn’t make it, she had to be at Woodbury. He had to be holding her back there.

We took the woman with us, Karen, back to Woodbury as she said she’d need to explain to the people on guard what happened, so they’d let us in and not shoot us on sight. It was now dark when got there, the night giving us some cover in our approach, but we parked away from Woodbury, close so it wasn’t far to get to on foot but far enough away so they didn’t hear the bike and truck engine approaching. We moved in on the front entrance, coming to a car near it for cover when a shot suddenly goes off and lands next to us, sending us quickly behind the car as we returned fire, now getting more in retaliation. There was a short moment of quiet as we ceased fire and the guards reloaded and Karen took it to call out.

“Tyreese! It’s me! Don’t-,” Karen shouts out, standing up from behind the car bonnet, but Rick grabs and yanks her back down. “Get down!” he yells as he does. One of the guards was Tyreese? The guy from that small group Rick had chucked from the prison. So they ended up here.

“Karen! Karen are you okay?” Tyreese screams back.

Karen shoves away from Rick and out from the car with her hands up. “I’m fine!” she shouts.

“Where’s the Governor?” he yells.

“He fired on everyone. He killed them all.” She calls out and there’s a moment of silence from Tyreese.

“Why are you with them?” he shouts eventually.

“They saved me!” she announces.

Rick shouts after a moment. “We’re coming out!”

Daryl and Michonne both shake their heads as he moves his rifle back around to his back. I sigh before doing the same as Daryl moves around the end of the car, rifle still in hand. Rick and I walk around the front of the car with our hands up, with Karen, as Michonne follows behind, holding her rifle up in the air with her other hand up. Daryl looks to us all before doing the same with his rifle, pointing it up. As we walk with our hands up towards the front gate, it’s suddenly opened and Tyreese appears with the woman that was with him at the prison, Sasha. The other two that were with them weren’t here, so they were probably amongst the massacre. They didn’t hold their guns at us so we dropped our hands as we stopped in front of them.

“What are you doing here?” Tyreese asks.

“We were coming to finish this, until we saw what the Governor did.” Rick states.

“He-- he killed them?” Tyreese stutters. “Yeah.” Rick pitifully replies.

“Karen told us Andrea hopped the wall, going for the prison. She never made it. She might be here. You gotta let us in. She’s our friend.” I announce.

Tyreese and Sasha look at each other, debating it with their eyes but not for long. They look back and Tyreese nods for us to come in and we rush inside. We knew exactly where to go if he was holding her here.

Coming back to the cells was not a nice feeling, at all. We all came in, leading Tyreese and Sasha behind us and they seemed to have no idea that these rooms, these makeshift cells were even here. Not that I was at all surprised, the Governor hid most things from everyone.

“This is where he had our people.” Rick announces as we approached the corner before the couple doors to the cells.

“The Governor held people here?” Tyreese questions, sounding shocked just at the thought of having people simply held prisoner.

“Did more than hold ‘em.” Daryl points out as we rounded the corner with Rick and I in front, with Daryl and the rest behind. Looking at the doors we lowered our weapons, seeing that the one at the end opposite us had a pool of blood seeping from under the door, coming from inside through the bottom of it. We slowly walked up to it and I moved my rifle onto my back and unsheathed my katana looking down at the blood, praying it wasn’t about to see a repeat of Merle.

Rick looked over to me as the three of us stood at the door with the others staying behind. “Will you open it?” I ask with slight impatience and worry, gripping my sword in anxious anticipation.

Daryl holds up his rifle at the door as Rick looks back and holds his python. He holds the door lock before he whispers up from one and unlocks the door, swinging it open on three. We see a bloodied dead body, that was only recently a walker from the looks of it, in the middle of the room by a chair and I recognise it to be Milton, that researcher that worked alongside the Governor. What had he done to get there I wondered but my thoughts were immediately cut short and he was pushed from my mind when I suddenly noticed Andrea slumped against the wall by the door. The blood was from her.

“Andrea!” I call rushing into the cell around to her side and dropping my sword without a thought as I crouched down to her. I grabbed her arm gently and pulled her up, supporting her head and back while Rick and Daryl moved in. She was weak and I could feel her skin was hot from just the back of her neck. I got her to lean on me sat at her side as Rick crouched down in front of her and Daryl stood at his side. 

“I tried to stop him.” She weakly spoke as I brought my hand to her forehead.

“You’re burning up.” I quietly state and she pulls back her top from her shoulder to reveal a severe bite wound at the lower side of her neck, sighing in pain. Rick looks down away from it, but my eyes don’t let me look away. I stare at it before she covers it back up and I could feel my tears forming in my eyes.

“Judith. Carl. The rest of them.” Andrea mutters, the beginning of a question.

“Us. The rest of us.” Rick corrects looking back at her.

“Are they alive?” she asks as I gently stroke the hair out her face, trying to hold back my tears.

“Yeah. They’re alive.” He answers and she smiles, glad to hear it.

She turns to face up at me. “You really were a stubborn bitch all through those months, saying we’d find them.” Andrea softly mocks with a weak, but big in heart, smile, getting a sad chuckle from me as I sniffed. “But I wouldn’t have had it any other way. It’s good that you did.” She continues causing the tears to fall down my face as I cried from her words. “So, did you finally tell him?” she questions with a smile, referring to Daryl, making me scoff and slightly smile too knowing she was talking about how I felt towards Daryl. 

I looked up to him. “Yeah. I did.” I confirm before looking back down at her, seeing her now face Daryl. “Good. Nearly eight months I had to watch her pine woefully over you.” She teases with a smirk getting a cried chuckle out of me from her joke.

“No one can make it alone now.” she pained.

“I never could.” Daryl softly replies.

She faces Rick again. “I just didn’t want anyone to die.” She states.

“We know.” I nod, crying.

She pushes herself from me slightly, propping herself up against the wall. “I can do it myself.” She announces. “No.” I protest.

“No, I have to. While I still can.” She points out, looking at me crying over her.

“Please.” She turns to Rick. “I know how the safety works.” She says, jerking my memory back to the Atlanta camp. When her sister Amy had died and she pulled a gun on Rick when he came over to her. I can see he remembers too; the sadness in his eyes making it obvious before he unholsters his gun and puts it in her hand.

“Well, I’m not going anywhere.” I declare, stroking the back of her head. 

She looks around at us. “I tried.” She whispers.

“Yeah. You did. You did.” Rick replies sorrowfully.

He rises and we watch them both walk out the cell, closing the door behind them. I still held Andrea as I sat next to her, my hand supporting her neck while the other held her hand in her lap. She looked at me with sad eyes as I cried from mine.

“I’m sorry I was such a cold bitch. I should never have left you. I shouldn’t have let you stay and just walked away.” I confess.

She shushes me. “If you hadn’t had left, you wouldn’t of found ‘em. I should’ve just trusted you from the start. Gone with you.” She weakly argues. “I’m the one who should be sorry.” She adds as I sniffled and cried.

“So, after saving my ass all winter and despite everything. Here you are at the end, holding my hand.” she says, still teasing in her final moments.

She gets one last pained chuckle from me as I cry. “So, it takes all this, for you to finally admit, that it was me who saved your ass all winter.” I tease back through the tears.

“Guess so.” She smiles, but mine soon fades again.

She gradually brings the gun to the side of her head, and I don’t break eye contact with her as I’m crouched now in front of her but still holding her free hand, shaking a little from knowing what was about to come next. We stared, looking at one another for the last time as I cried but Andrea smiled.

I gently brought my forehead to hers, resting ours together. “Thank you, for being a friend.” I cry.

I pull my head back away. “No. Thank you.” She softly whispers, a smile still on her face.

She suddenly pulls the trigger. The shot echoes in the room and Rick’s gun clatters to the floor, her blood now splattered on the wall and floor, as she slumps to the side. But I pick her up and cradle her in my arms, my cries now exploding out of me. I sat there with her, sobbing alone, for a moment. I wasn’t sure how long, but eventually Rick and Daryl came back in, to help me with her, to bring her back home to us. Where she belonged.

Morning had broken when we arrived back at the prison. We’d brought Andrea back just like I wanted, what we wanted. But also, a bus full of the Woodbury people that had stayed in the town, that hadn’t come out to fight. Tyreese and Sasha drove them, following us, so we could bring them all back with us.

Glenn and Maggie opened the gate and we all drove into the courtyard as the rest of the group came out the cellblock. We gathered at the back of truck, the group looking on at the people Tyreese, Sasha and Karen were helping off the bus.

“What is this?” Carl questions, seeming annoyed.

“They’re gonna join us.” Rick states, looking around at the group, with a few of them nodding.

Carl storms off but the group walk over and help direct and lead the people inside to the cellblock. I stay by the truck, Daryl by my side, looking at Andrea’s body wrapped up in the back, thinking how and when we were going to be able to bury her in the yard with the others. I didn’t want to leave her in the truck too long. 

“Hey.” Rick softly speaks to get my attention, coming to stand next to me and I look up at him. “She’s gone. We did the right thing.” He says, looking at the Woodbury people, making us both turn to look at them too.

“Who’s gone?” I ask a little confused.

“Lori. I stopped seeing her. Every bad decision, she was there. She’s gone.” He explains.

Chewing my lip, I nod smally looking on at the people. I feel Rick’s hand on my shoulder, squeezing it slightly and I bring mine up and rest it on his, patting it gently as I sighed, before bringing it back down to my side. We stood watching as our people helped the Woodbury people in and I realised a sad reality. To get to this point, a place of peace, to finally make this place a home, each of us had lost someone close to us. I’d lost Andrea, Rick lost Lori, Daryl lost Merle and we’d all lost T-Dog. He had sacrificed himself and saved Carol. Merle had sacrificed himself for all of us, sparing me. Andrea tried to save us all, Woodbury included. And Lori had fought and lost bringing Judith into the world. And all that was exactly why we had to make the struggle worth it, for all of them.

“We’ve got to make this work. To make a life here. All of us. For our people who aren’t here now.” I announce. “Yeah.” Rick quietly says in agreement as Daryl brings his arm around my shoulders, planting a light peck on the side of my head. 

“We will.” Daryl states. I bring my hand up to his resting below my shoulder, entwining them together.

“And we’ll do it together. And we’ll be stronger for it.” Rick adds, looking to me as he reiterates my words I said to him back in the cellblock before the attack. I look back at him with a sad smile, knowing he was referring to what I said. He gives me one slight nod in affirmation and mirror it back. I rested my head on Daryl’s shoulder, still holding his hand at mine, as the three of us stood there. We would make this work because we had each other.


End file.
